Must I spend hateful Xmas at MIL's???!

[Brozzer]

I've always had great advice on MN about MIL issues.
I posted about awful showdown with MIL some months ago.
We've since very superficially patched things up but I don't like her, don't trust her and don't want to wake up in her pad on Xmas day.
She thinks it's her turn to have us for Xmas despite this row.
Is it OK for me to say no, not ready to spend Xmas with you, want more time?

good idea dramaqueen - my only experience to get over the whole in law thing was that from the first year we had our son, we became a family - so we don't go anywhere we stay at home with OUR family, same at new year too.

We barely get enough time together as a family anway, so I'll be damned if I'm spending it anywhere other than where we want to when we get a decent break from work.

Brozzer remember you are calling the shots. You are the mum so it's up to you to decide where you'll go. It's good enough just to say, 'We want our first christmas together as a family' or to get dp to do it.
Perhaps you could let dp go and visit her before, with your ds, and have a break or go and do some christmas shopping. That way she gets to see her son and grandson but you don't have to be part of it yet.