What made you walk away from your marriage and are you glad you did?

[charliecat]

This is for a friend who I will show the thread to next time shes here. She cant seem to make the decision to go, hes an arse and is not going to change, she knows that but cant get it together to walk away...

I wouldn't press it. Different people can/can't live with different things. It took me two years after my xh had a vasectomy to acknowledge that I did want to try and have children. That had always been the case but it took a sequence of events to make me understand what I really wanted. One was a good friend having a baby; another was suddenly having a vision of living with my xh in retirement, realising we had completely different views of what that should be like; another, embarrassingly, was watching a movie... oh dear.

Im not pressing it, promise, its been our main topic of conversation for months...hope you are happier now

oh sorry! yes, much. it took me some time to be happier exactly, but what disappeared from the day I left him was the knot of tension that used to be in my stomach every day. I was so used to it that I'd barely noticed it. It was joy to relax at last after 5 years with him.

I threw my first husband out after he physically abused me. It was a violent relationship and the love I had for him died years before.
I only stayed with him for the kids and the thought of being on my own was a major factor.
I just realised that I could do it no more as the marriage was damaging me physically and mentally.
I must admit if he was not thrown out I would of gladly left with the kids.

omg doormat, how brave