I've been posting about the relationship here for a while. You can track back through the threads here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1098949-Would-you-date-a-32-year-old-man-whose-longest-term-relationship-was-8-mos-Hes-slept-w-20-women-and-says-he-is-almost-always-the-one-to-leave
So that was last weekend. This weekend he shows up at my place on Sat. We didn't have any specific plans which I thought was odd. He starts out by telling me how crushed he is at work-- how things have been piling up and he just can't seem to get out from under it. He specifically mentions how he has to write a certain kind of document that I have a lot of experience with. I offered to help him with it. At that point, he stopped and said that we needed to have a talk.
I knew what was coming and he proceeded to tell me that he didn't think we had set a very good foundation to the relationship and that it wasn't feeling right to him. I agree with that-- he's totally right. I mean, I didn't even tell him I was in the process of getting a divorce until months in! That was so dumb. I was wrong in not being way more open with him from the start and he was wrong in exactly the same way.
He also said that due to his crazy workload (he does work 100 hours per week) he simply cannot afford even the small-ish amount of time we spent together. Which I can also see as I have a similar background and I know what it would be like to have the crazy job he has.
Furthermore, I was intending to leave the city we're in for elsewhere at the end of Feb. and would only be staying for him... But, to add complication to the matter, he's leaving for somewhere in May and he currently has no idea where-- it will entirely depend on where he gets hired. So that, to him, seems too complicated to work with. I can see that, but to me it doesn't really matter where I end up as long as it's not here and I have the career and financial flexibility to be most anywhere.
He also said that he just had a feeling that things were "off" and that he couldn't really explain why. I pressed him a couple of times and he had no real answer.
After that discussion, I brought up the notion of us continuing to see each other only for sex. He seemed amenable to that and we went back to my place and shagged a couple of times. After which he needed to leave to go attend to more work.
What would you do if you were me? Part of me wants to use the sex aspect for 1. the amazingly hot sex and 2. to see if there's any notion that maybe we could build a better foundation and work out the living thing.