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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Feeling very down today

3 replies

karen1961 · 09/12/2010 11:27

Main issue is in my thread earlier. Another man who has started a relationship elsewhere. Still missing him like mad, why am I such an idiot? As everyone who replied to my post said, he just isn't worth the time and energy, but it still doesnt stop me wanting to be with him. I've fallen really deep, probably the first time in my life if I'm honest and so I just dont have the tools to deal with this. I've always been strong with men, my husband is extemely difficult so I've had to be and if I look back, isnt helping although I loved my husband when we got married, I never had the feelings for him that I do with this man. Counselling isnt helping much, all I have started to do is try to put a smile on my face and brave it out, but its wearing having to smile all the time.

Anyone out there got any ideas how I get over this, I hate feeling this way I really do, I've always been happy sort of bod, now Im finding it really hard to keep a cheerful front up for everyone

OP posts:
WherecanIhide · 09/12/2010 12:07

Sorry - nothing helpful to say, just didn't want to ignore you xxx

Taghain · 09/12/2010 13:38

There's only one cure, and that is time.
relish the fact that you CAN get those strong feelings, and look forward to the next time but with a more suitable man.

Antalya1 · 09/12/2010 13:56

You want to be with him, because he's the idealised 'escape' from a life that you're not happy with atm. Just read through your previous thread and whilst our circumstances are different I can identify with how you are feeling. This OM represents the happy new start where every thing is clean and fresh.'A knight in shinning armour'???

It's probably not the man as such, he has shown himself as un-worthy,perhaps it's easier to focus on him than other areas in your life? Getting over it may be accepting that you may be 'stuck' in this process for a little while yet but then making decisions over what you have the power to change, Your marriage? Whether to stay or go?

I do understand 100% how you're feeling over the last couple of weeks I've been stuck in the same place as you, reviewing my year, and it wasn't one of my best ever!!...and ended with a very intense,brief crap relationship...

Could you give yourself some time to have a think about what your options are and what it is that you really want?

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