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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

has anybodys man srayed after baby is born

20 replies

starshaker · 13/09/2005 21:13

i know some have. i was just speaking to my friend and it turns out her man and mine both had something going on either with text or email was just wandering if its common or were just unlucky (were both still with our men)

OP posts:
morningpaper · 13/09/2005 21:15

I read this as 'spayed'

ssd · 13/09/2005 21:15

sorry starshaker, but I had to read your title to this thread twice.

I thought it said "has anybodys man been sprayed after baby is born" !!

starlover · 13/09/2005 21:17

me too ssd!

Fio2 · 13/09/2005 21:19

I done even understand

ssd · 13/09/2005 21:19

glad you aren't offended!

Blu · 13/09/2005 21:22

'strayed', Fio!
And sadly, it seems a fairly common problem .How are you now Starshaker?

I remember you posting about it...

Fio2 · 13/09/2005 21:30

oh crikey, i am so sorry, i just really couldnt work it out I never found out mine had done anything but have heard lots of stories about others

Lonelymum · 13/09/2005 21:33

Oh, I know there is no logic to this, but I assumed the title of this thread was has anybodys man prayed after baby is born ie sent up a prayer of thanks!

Lonelymum · 13/09/2005 21:34

Oh sorry, just realised the implication of the title. Sorry, not trying to make light of anyone.

Original poster
starshaker · 13/09/2005 22:09

its ment to say strayed lol spelt it wrong. yeah getting there but still not the same trying to do more thing together but still havent done "it" yet

OP posts:
Original poster
starshaker · 13/09/2005 22:13

by the way getting him spayed was 1 of my thoughts at the time

OP posts:
Blu · 13/09/2005 22:15

To be honest, i'm not surprised, Starshaker. It seems llike the ultimate cruel betrayal, doesn't it? It didn't happen to me, but I have always thought it was terrible behaviour when I have heard about it, and I would be utterely gutted.

I suppose from their point of view, they might be panicking, feeling alienated by the childbirth process etc etc

Actually, I made a point of resuming s*x quickly because I was so terrified of feeling that sexuality was being swamped out of our relationship - maybe men feel the same - but they shouldn't be so immature, insecure and untrustworthy!

Hope you can get some sense out of your DP soon, and regain your trust and closeness.

Original poster
starshaker · 13/09/2005 22:39

yeah theres days where i feel yip hes great and others i lie there thinking either why am i here, it would be better for dd if i got out now and god i wish hed leave

OP posts:
pesha · 13/09/2005 23:13

Yep, before, during and after. Well ok not literally during he was with me for the birth but had got back with his ex without me knowing while i was pg and then about 2 weeks after me having our baby he started seeing another girl aswell!

His was a major freak out though due to problems from his childhood and then family things happening and stuff.

And he's a compulsive liar.

And possibly a sex addict.

Lovely guy though!

Carlk · 13/09/2005 23:52

Actually DW was quite spectacularly sick all over me during DD's arrival I was a perfect gent and never batted an eyelid tho. I went home in one of her t shirts as we only brought a change of clothes for her.

not what you were asking I know but i was just reminded

nightowl · 14/09/2005 00:22

yes, mine didnt even wait until i was out of hospital!! nice of her to keep my bed warm for me.

nightowl · 14/09/2005 00:23

his shagpiece i mean

QueenOfQuotes · 14/09/2005 00:35

I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm really sorry - but I haven't read this thread yet - but each time I see the title I think it says

"Has anbodys man SPRAYED after baby is born"

kelli22 · 14/09/2005 13:35

Nightowl - i would have killed him - in your bed while you were in hospital fgs some men should not be allowed out without supervision!

Blu · 14/09/2005 18:59

Starshaker - this is obviously troubling you - start a new thread with a slighly different title? 'DS strayed at time of birth - still no trust'?

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