Quite literally, so I need to list everything here, if you could give me your opinions that would be helpful. If you don't want to, then fine, just don't attack me please...
All the things that h has done:
I have overheard phone calls, he has said "I've met someone else, so I have to break up with you"...."ofcourse you're beautiful..' He has denied it, even though I walked into the room which is how I heard it, he has told me I am imagining it and once tried to make me think I was delusional and needed psychiatric help...I began to believe him. I was very confused. He even spoke to someone, at a supermarket and arranged a date with her, I was stood next to him, he even denied that. Again, apparently I was imagining it. Lots more similar things, can't list them here, I would be here all day. He still denies this now. This has been going on for ten years, I don't know why I stayed or why I believed that I am mad.
He had always made snide comments, sarcastic put-downs and said he is joking. I used to be slim, and he said I was fat, I was a size 8-10. It was awful. I am now a size 14-16,(after children) and I feel big for me, but because of how he has made me feel about myself, I can't seem to shift the weight. I have tried to join the gym, he refused to look after the children. I wanted to get a wii fit to use at home, he spent as much money as possible to make it impossible to buy one.
If I leave the house, he phones me every ten minutes and when I don't answer he shouts at me when he sees me. I once went to a childrens health centre, he phoned continuously, and then rang the receptionist there, so I had to call him back...it was not imortant. I was embarrased. I tried to make friends there.
At the moment I battle with agoraphobia, and he makes me feel worse. I make effort to leave the house each day with some excuse, like buying milk, going to the po, if he finds out, he does the errand so I am stuck at home again. Or he will hide my shoes, he must be doing that, because I can never find them at that specific point, or he hides my car key, door key etc.
Lately, his tactics involve trying to turn the children against me, and telling them "mummy will hit you if you do that' (I never hit my children), I know because my youngest ds told me what daddy told him.
I know I need to leave, but I can't bring myself to.
There is more, so much more, but I can't type it all out here...