I have a couple of friends who have been made redundant in the last year. they both worked in the private sector whereas DH and I work in the public sector.
In the past, both friends have earned way in excess of the money I've earnt. Both have had loads of "perks" like bonuses, company cars, gym membership etc. One of them has a holiday home abroad, something that we could never afford.
Since both lost their jobs, things have been tough for them financially, as you'd imagine. Both are looking really hard for something else, both have had interviews and neither has got anything.
Friend A (Jennifer) is having a particularly bad time because her DH was made redundant at the same time and they have both been unable to get a new job. They have three children. Friend B (Amanda) has a well-paid husband and only one child, so her position is not so bad as Jennifer's.
I'm finding it increasingly hard to know how to handle Amanda. Jennifer wears her heart on her sleeve - she'll come out for a drink and tell us all how worried she is about their finances and that they don't know how they're going to cope when the redundancy money runs out. Although I don't always know exactly what to say, I can usually give her a hug and buy her a drink and make her laugh - not sure there's anything else I can offer.
Amanda is entirely different. She hates going to sign on because of all the "scumbags" in the dole office. I can understand this must make her feel crappy and I know I don't have experience of this (not because I've never been unemployed because I have and I remember how I felt but I didn't claim benefits). She claims she saves her dole money for the family holiday (they're going to Florida). She is constantly having a "go" at what she perceives my husband's salary to be (she is wrong, by the way!).
We had two holidays this summer (first time ever - because we didn't have a holiday last year) and she wouldn't let this drop. Because we work in the public sector, she keeps writing things on my facebook page about how much of taxpayers money is being wasted on public sector salaries and pensions. She has questioned my husband's working patterns, shifts, hours, pay and his ability to earn overtime. She questions this with the air of somebody who can't believe how "their" money is being spent.
I honestly don't know what to say to her or how to handle her. Her position is rubbish, I know, because she's lost her job, but she still has a (lovely) roof over her head and a lovely DH who earns enough money to make them comfortable.
TBH I think my DH earns a fair salary for the amount of responsibility on his shoulders, and in any case, I don;t think it's any of her business. She has no real idea of what he does, only knows what she reads in the papers (which she uses on my facebook page....)
I don't want to make things awkward (been there before - she was wretched to me after I had my second child - she had tried to conceive a second child and failed) - but then again we have several friends in common and she tends to be the organiser of social functions/get togethers. Last time she fell out with me (when I had the baby) she stopped inviting me to things and I hardly ever saw our mutual friends because they didn't realise (until it was too late) that I hadn't been asked along.
Wat's her problem? Help!