Hypnotheraphy?

[tefal]

I am going to find this hard to put into words. Basically because I don't really have a clear picture of my childhood in my own mind.

I am thinking about asking my GP for a hypnotherapy referral (if there is such a thing).

I have been to a counsellor before but found myself telling the woman what she wanted to hear simply because I don't have the clear picture of what happened to me in my childhood.

What I do know is that I believe I was abused and potentially my mother covered it up/refused to acknowledge it. My mother before she died, only really wanted me in her life because she needed help at the end.

The abuse I feel I suffered feels more like one of those real types of dreams that you have. You know the ones where you wake up and think goodness, was that real and it may be throws you off for the day.

I've tried remembering more but it is like a curtain over part of my memory. I don't have any memories of my childhood - AT ALL. No birthday's, christmas, days out etc. Nothing at all. My first memories are from probably 5th/6th year at school.

I hate knowing there is something there but not being able to reach it so I am wondering if some form of hypnotherapy might help?

Do you really watt to know though?

If your brain has not remembered the first 10 years of your life, there is a reason, and I guess it's not pleasant.

Could you afford hypnotherapy privately ( I think it's about £50/60 per session) If you go, meet they hypnotherapist first and find someone you feel you can trust.

I have no idea about GP referrals, but it's worth a try.

Hypnotherapy can possibly help reveal things in that it involves being in a state of deep relaxation, which can help counteract the stress associated with the past event. This can make you stop yourself remembering it, as a sort of self-preservation.

All I can add, is that after EMDR in connection with past events, a little more came into focus - a bit like sharpening up an out of focus image. However, it only revealed a little bit more, and I already had a memory of most of the event.

You may already have some clues, in that some things may seem unpleasant without any logical reason, or a bit weird.

Hope that helps, didn't want to leave the post unanswered.

Thank you both for your kind words. It isn't something I am just going to jump at first thing Monday. It needs proper consideration.

At the moment, I do want to know/remember rather than not. It has such a knock on effect with my relationship with my husband.

I'd be very careful OP using hypnotherapy to retrieve 'hidden' memories.

How about you seek out a specialist sexual abuse/trauma type counsellor and take it from there?.

I am a survivor of abuse and cannot remember much before the age of 7/8.I think this is very common with survivors.

I'd also recommend this book

Thanks for the book link. Will have a look.

I've had appointments with a counsellor but didn't get anywhere as I just can't put into words/remember properly what happened.

May be worth another try though with a different person?

You say that your first memories are from your 5th/6th year at school, is this primary school? If so, this is not unusual.

You may find it difficult to get a GP referral to a hypnotherapist in order to uncover buried memories as this has been widely discreditted and has lead to many therapists being pursued in the courts. You say that in regular therapy you had a tendency to say what you thought the therapist wanted to hear. This is a sign of vulnerability and at this time I would think that hypnotherapy could exploit your vulnerability.

I do think that you are in difficulty for some reason and if you can find a good therapist, then go and be honest. Tell them that you can't remember and that it is having a detrimental effect on your present. A psychodynamic therapist may be able to help as they tend to concentrate and help with returning to childhood stages. Psychodynamic therapy takes time, but I think that in your case it would be a better bet than hypnotherapy. Good Luck.

Yes,def worth another try.

I had very specific counselling,it was very hard going but worth while.I had to learn how to let go as I had kept my childhood abuse a secret all my life until then,trusting another human being and unleashing my scared inner child was very tough.

I hope you find your safe haven to open up Tefal,even vocalising the smallest,dim memories helps.

The book was a great help to me btw

X

Reputable hypnotherapists won't do regression therapy under these circumstances (though you may well get a self-promotional reply from a certain hypnotherapist in West London!) I know just what you mean, though. I haven't remembered much at all from my own childhood but have, through psychotherapy, put enough pieces of it together to clarify the true picture and my feelings about it. I worked through John Bradshaw's "Homecoming" with the support of a therapist, then continued with my treatment.

There are lots of different ways to uncover - and resolve - issues remaining from a difficult childhood. The counsellor you saw probably wasn't up to the job. I feel you'd do better with an experienced, BACP-registered psychotherapist who understands your predicament. Also, have a read of therealsmithfield's introductory post to the Stately Homes threads :)

As far as hypnotherapy goes, I love the stuff! I use it myself for pain relief & confidence-boosting purposes. It just isn't an appropriate tool for long-term issues of such a pervasive nature.

Go gently on yourself - don't look for quick fixes, but do give yourself 'permission' to feel badly about your family if you wish. x

tefal, I am in the same position as you. I posted about it on chat a while ago.
I also don't have a clear memory but vaguely remember something bad happening to me. I have approximately 3 clear memories before the age of 13.
I asked my GP if they would refer to a hypnotherapist and my doctor says they don't do that, but that may just be my area.
I have considered for a long time (since January) and have decided I would rather know because the not-knowing really upsets me.
I am still considering going to see a hypnotherapist but I would like to find one personally recommended and don't know anyone that has seen one!
I am also considering seeing a psychotherapist but wondering if this is something you can do through the nhs or have to pay for privately? Am a little short of funds atm. Does anyone know about this?

Sorry to hijack your thread a little there, mainly I just wanted to tell you that you're not alone! I hope we can both resolve this soon.

Psychotherapy on the NHS is a postcode lottery (and is undergoing further cuts as we speak). NHS psychologists are pretty top-notch on the whole, though. If I'd know about all this when I started my process, I'd have pushed harder for a referral and probably made faster progress. You need to lay it on really thick for the GP. I'm not talking about faking an illness, but one of 'our' difficulties is that we were brought up to think of our families as normal. Lacking a healthy benchmark, it can be hard to express the problem (as you know!)

It helps to write down all the things you feel distressed about; GPs are interested in how your psychological condition impacts on your daily life - again, this is hard to identify for oneself but you can surprise yourself once you start writing it down. Posting to Mumsnet can help you get perspective, too ... so keep on posting!

What you are talking about isn't hypnotherapy, it's regression hypnotism, not available on NHS. Provision for therapy on the NHS for people with abusive childhoods is a postcode lottery and sadly lacking in most areas. Your average therapist available via the GP surgery may have done a top up course on it but probably won't have deep knowledge. There may be specialist traumatic stress services offering EDMR in the area but, again, postcode lottery.
Have a look at this site and see if you can find some advice about where to start
www.napac.org.uk/