XH being arsey about my new relationship

[Sukie1971]

I split with my H back in April, all fairly amicable (as amicable as it can be anyway). I began a new relationship in July, and told XH at the time - he wasnt happy. Divorce is in progress now, instigated by me, and not contested by XH.

Tonight I asked him to look after the dog next March overnight as Im taking our DS (14) to a concert and will be back home v late. I didnt explain fully at the time, just asked if he'd be ok to look after her overnight next March, to which he asked "why", with a nasty look on his face.

I assume he thought I was going away with my new man. The thing is, I AM planning on going away with him for 4 nights in February, and will need XP to look after DS and the dog.

Advice please as Im now worried he'll refuse to look after his son and the dog in order to stop me from going. Has anyone else had to deal with similar?

put the dog in kennels.

at 14 does your son not have a mates he can stay at for a night or twothen go to his dads at weekends.

anyway - what you do and what you can and cant do shouldn't be dependent on his availability. so adhere to an existing agreement re access or get one.

TBH the best advice I can give is to make sure you have someone else (grandparents?) who can look after DS and the dog when necessary, as men like this love to think they've got you over a barrel and will agree to look after the DC then cancel at the last minute, purely in order to screw up your social life.
ALternatively, if your XP is generably reasonable and is just having a bit of a temporary sulk about the fact that you are dating, you could point out to him that his DS loves him and wants to spend time with him.

I just feel angry, and sad for DS that XP will pass over the chance of spending time with his DS just to screw up my plans.

I dont have my parents living nearby, they're 90 miles away and not in the best of health, so I cant rely on them. Anyway, I shouldn't have to. XH may not be with me anymore, but he is still DS' father.