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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

separation

4 replies

angieR · 01/10/2010 15:59

How do I tell my 7 year old we are splitting up? I have tried so hard for this not to happen but feel Iv'e come to the end of the line. My heart breaks for him,how to I mininmize the upset?

OP posts:

jellyrolly · 01/10/2010 20:50

I really feel for you angieR. I haven't been in your position, I hope someone comes along who can help but just wanted to add my sympathies.

What does your DS know at the moment? Has he asked you anything?

sandsad · 01/10/2010 20:54

I'm really sorry to hear this.

It's best to do it together, to show him you and his dad are a united front for him.

I think explaining that you will always both love him, and that won't change.

H told DS when I wasn't there, we hadn't agreed we were going to do it then, and it was all horrible.

You are right to plan it, but do it together. He will bounce back, and your new life will become normal very soon.

Good luck x

joshuasmummy06 · 01/10/2010 21:36

I'm going to be facing this very soon and have had to have a good think about what to say to our four year old, thankfully our youngest isn't two yet and so he will never really remember me and his dadd living together.

I'm just going to tell him that mummy and daddy have decided to live apart and make it more exciting by telling him that we are going to be moving to a new house etc and also make sure that he knows how much we both love him and his brother.

Not a fab example I know and i'm sure that when the time has to come I will hopefully have thought f something a little bit better. It's so hard isn't it? x

Original poster

angieR · 02/10/2010 23:06

Thanks so much for replying. It's nice to talk to others who are going through the same thing.My DH works away often and I have told my DS that daddy is away and at the moment he is happy with that.
A little background info,my DH has a drink problem and the man I married is just not there anymore. We have been married for 28 years and been together for 30. We have 3 older children who are a support for me, but they have lost all respect for their father.
I think we should tell him in the half term so he has a bit of time to get used to it.I will take your advice and we will tell him together. Trouble is, I am saying goobye to my life as I know it and I shall be upset and that will upset DS and it will be horrible.I know I can't protect him any longer from this, but I can do damage limitation, so I must get this right and hope his life settles down again soon.
Thank you again for replying x

OP posts:

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