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Relationships

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Original poster

Sex drive

5 replies

ParadiseRegained · 22/09/2010 19:14

Evening ladies,
gosh, even in text this is embarrassing to write. I have a 7 month old baby, and since he has been born I have lost my appetite for sex. He sleeps from 5.30pm until 7am so I can't blame tiredness...I know having a baby has knocked my confidence, but it isn't even that...I love (and fancy) my dh but I'm just not wanting to have sex-I'm partially scared it'll hurt after childbirth my dh has been so patient and wonderful saying he will wait until I'm ready but I can't expect him to wait much longer...can anyone either relate or shine some light on this for me? (although I don't think candles and sexy underwear/texts will fix this...I think it's a mental block...)

OP posts:

ChaoticAngel · 22/09/2010 20:36

If it's a mental block can you see you doctor or maybe some counselling.

To take the pressure off how about non penetrative sex to start off with. Tell you dh that you're scared that it might hurt. Maybe use lube the first few times when you get to the stage of trying penetrative sex and ask your dh to be gentle and to agree to stop if necessary.

celticfairy101 · 22/09/2010 20:42

You can't expect him to wait much longer. I hate to read this phrase. What do you think he's going to do?

The more you think your DH is going to go off looking for sex elsewhere the more pressured you'll feel to doing it.

What I would advise is to just do it. With a lot of lube. And to not expect fireworks. You'll get back on track gradually. Good luck.

Rosedee · 23/09/2010 10:41

I had a bit of a mental block and thought it was gonna hurt. Lots of lube and it was fine. To be honest though still don't have a very high sex drive at all. I am just not interested. Tis very common. Dp and i trying to figure it all out at the mo so he doesn't feel neglected and I don't feel pressured.

Original poster

ParadiseRegained · 23/09/2010 12:04

Thanks, I'll give it a go ! Watch this space. Celtic Fairy-I know he won't go elsewhere!! What I meant was, I don't expect him to just wait forever because I'm probably just being paranoid, it isn't fair on him, same time I'm just a nervous wreck about the whole thing :(

OP posts:

Mumcah · 23/09/2010 13:02

My sex drive has just started to come back,my DS is 4 months and I had a C section so don't have the worry of that.I do find that breastfeeding (and pregnancy!)has a huge impact on my sex drive i.e it disappears.
Apparentlt it takes a year for your body to recover from pregnancy so it's understandable that you don't want to get straight back to it.

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