Lying about having heard from the ex

[Kushanku]

We have a few problems with DH's ex being unreliable and frankly quite strange. Anyway I asked him last night if he'd heard from her at all this week, he said no. I've just looked on the online account (mine is in there as well) and it turns out he actually text her twice last night. Once whilst he was "on toilet" (i.e. locked in the bathroom) and the second time when he told me he was going for a shower. So again, in the bathroom.
I don't understand why he'd lie and why he'd go to such lengths to text her away from me? I don't kick off or anything when he contacts her so why would he lie? I've not told him that I know but I did ask a general "you still not heard from *?" (as we are actually anticipating a text from her before weekend) and he said "no". ???

But your question was if he had heard from her, and he might not have done, so he answered honestly?

If you're anticipating a text from her then maybe he was chasing her about that? And maybe he does it away from you so you don't have to deal with it? Or maybe he just doesn't want to talk about it?

Alarm bells ringing! He's had contact and he says he hasn't. You say that she's unreliable and strange, is she really or is that just what he wants you to believe and why?

But all other times, he tells me and its very rare for him to text her unless she's text him first. I just really don't like being lied to. I'm not bothered that he text her at all, I'm bothered that he outright lied to me.

How Ex is she ? and who left who ?

I would be very suspicious, TBH

Well things have not been great between us lately, he's been very distant and cold towards me which is also adding to the oddness of it.

Sorry Breev, its been about 3 years I think and she left him.

I've just thought, rather than bring it up later, I'm going to try and get hold of his phone sometime tonight. In his sent messages SHOULD be these two I've seen on the account details and at least 1 from her in his inbox. If they've been wiped, I'll have to assume it's dodgy.

But did he lie? Maybe he hasn't heard from her? (yes, he sent her a couple of texts, but maybe he hasn't heard from her?!)

Re-phrase your question to him as has he contacted her, and see if he is honest then?

CB

Surely that is just pedantry ?

Or should that be semantics ?

Exactly, if someone said to me "have you heard from x" I'd automatically say "I text him/her earlier". I wouldn't just say no.

Even if its not a direct lie and she hasn't contacted HIM, its still avoiding the truth, isnt it by just saying "no"?

Uh oh.
Secret texs made from the bathroom are never a good thing , id want to see exactly what those texts said seeing as he went out of his way to do it away from you and then lie about it.

OP, your gut is telling you that something is wrong and it's probably right.