seperation.

[ozzywiz]

Question . . in your opinions when a none resident parent collects the children for contact should everything be provided like pram bottles with milk and nappies and cream and bongella etc for the one year old ? I do provide all these things just curious if the situation was reversed if I would of received all this.
the handovers can be so dificult in the sense of mixed emotions and also feelings that they gonna make allegations and pass judgments etc . . hopefully in time they will get easier. . .

Your opening message was a bit confusing. But, yes, I would give EX DH all this stuff, basically because he would not even think to go out and get it all himself.

thanks . sorry for the confusion. I think the post was a moment of despair that my ex has been gone now for 12 weeks after having an affair and has not paid a penny towards the kids or helped in anyway now wants loads of contact which ive not denied but also wants it on a plate. I have provided all this stuff also so the baby dont miss out.

So sorry to hear about your arse of an ex. I was in a similar situation myself two years ago...I got some great advice and know that you are entitled to some payment. Why is he not paying?!!

I do provide everything, though I bitterly resent the time I take doing it, for my kids when ex comes to get them. This is mainly because I want things to be as normal as possible for them, and to relax knowing they have everything they need. But a little bit of me is showing off to him just how much they need me and what a great mum I am. Childish, hey..!

I understand exactly what you meen. the question is why is she not paying . . apologies for not clarifying im a guy as a resident parent but this is clear in my other thread. I have no idea why she does not pay and everytime I ask her she replies her solicitor is dealing with it.

Ozzywiz, what is your solicitor doing? I hope you have one and a good one. I would also be concerned, is she just upping the contact because she is going to go for full residency?

My sol is doing very little to be honest . they just keep saying lets see what happens in mediation. And yes I feel my ex is now trying to change the status quo sso she can apply for full residency. she does want the kids back now so will probably go to court although we have discussed shared residency in mediation but its hard to know if she is being genuine. anyhow she cant do anything yet a she has no house to offer residency so for now she only wants contact but she asking for like 5 days a week which of course is not acceptable. Im concerned now cause she has the baby 4 days a week which is too much.

What is usually classed as resonable contact for a parent who does not put their kids first ? I know a lot of none residential parents are given contact centre contact so would this be a good option and am I in a position to enforce this ?

I am seriously concidering cutting contact down for my childrens mother. not somthing I want to do but feel it is best for the kiddies . She never asked for contact for the first 8 weeks of her leaving and now she has I have agreed to full days wednesday and saturday with thursday being a day just for her and the one year old but this day is just a 3 week trial agreed in mediation.

Anyways she left me and the kids for his bloke fueled by post natal depresion so before she left neglect for the kids was eveident. .

she is now sayin that she wants the kids full time but I am avbiously objecting as they best with me in the family home. .

For her up to now 8 contact days she has only ever taken them to her boyfriends house (not her registered place of living as she claims she is living at her grandads) . . The kids feel uncomfortable their and have only one meal between the hours of 10 and 7.30pm. and they are that bored sat watching tv whilst their mother is sat in back garden smoking that they fall asleep in the front room. I am shocked at this as my kids never fall asleep in the day and for all 5 to fall asleep there must be somthing wrong . . . so im concidering 10 - 3 saturday and wednesday from school to 7.00pm and forget the thursday with baby as this is getting the other kids jealous. . .would this have a negative affect if it went to court for custody ?

anyone any opinions. .