Have just told dh I want to separate. Its the hardest thing.

[Shaxx]

I think I still love him sometimes but I can't live with him anymore. He's turned into a bit of a Jekyll and Hyde character. He flips and has mood swings at the slightest thing.
He wasn't always this bad but its got worse recently. He's turning 40 this year and I was wondering if that had anything to do with it?
I hate his mood swings. He's verbally abusive and swears at me. I do sometimes give as good as I get but thats usually after he's wound me up for a while. Other times I'll just tell him to shut up.

I don't know how to deal with it.
Ideally, I don't want us to split. I just want him to stop being an arse. We've talked about it before and he's not changed. I don't think he can.

Is there any hope?

I would say there is hope if you both really want there to be but you probably need some help. If he won't go to counseling with you then he's not really committed to changing things though.

Hi, just want to let you know that I am going through a similar situation (see here and here for my threads if you are interested.

Although I suspect the reasons for our split are different to yours, the fact that you ended it due to his behaviour but do still love him and want it to work out, as well as being in a situation when you have talked about it and tried to resolve the problems but have failed sounds all very familiar.

I wish you all the luck in the world.

Thanks.
He's just texted me to tell me that he'll burn the house down and wreck everything in it before he lets me have anything. He's gone on about how I've wasted his money (we've just ordered a car)

He just goes mental. This is normal for him now.

Just gonna read your posts Notthehappiest.