Some of us may have to settle mightn't we?

[poshsinglemum]

I can't have the man I love or want. He's just not that into me.
I have started to do internet dating but can't help feeling that noone will make me feel the way he does due to our shared history. I know I should look to the future and create more shared experiences with a new man.
Another example is that I always wanted baby but instead of waiting to get married, I got pregnant in a relatively new relationship. I wa shappy to be pregnant but he wasn't which is not what I planned at all. I felt that my fertility was running out so I had to get pregnant before it was too late.

So our biological clock sometimes makes us settle for the wrong man dosn't it? Likewise some women ''settle'' for sperm donors and single parenthood because they didn't meet ''the one'' in time.

Read a book called....ummm I think it is
Mr Good Enough

Ia m not into self help books but this was really good. All about what you are talking about.

I've got a feeling I would have done the same if I felt my clock was running out and Mr Right wasn't about.

TBH I think I settled at the grand old age of 22 because I had such low self esteem I believed I'd never be able to get somebody who made me go 'wow'.

Regretting it now!

No don't settle! I've been very lucky in meeting my absolute soul mate, best friend etc but then again he may just dump me in 20 years at which point i'll become a nun or 'settle' for a 19 year old toy boy.

I settled at 19 through to 30 because, for one reason and another, it was just too hard to stop. As time went on, I began to forget how to not be with him and even now I cannot imagine being with anyone else. Not in a good way - I don't want him back, I just can't picture anyone else.

Don't settle without being absolutely sure of what you want. I think it's a balance of examining your own criteria to see if you're being too picky and valuing yourself enough to hold out for what you really want.If that makes sense?

i used to think aged 20 i'd never meet the ryt one & wel at 25 i met my soul mate so i thought. Got married to him at 28 & became preg with dd1. Things changed & we have now seperated. Moral of the story whether you settle or think you've met your soul mate things can change over time!!!
If your happy then id say go for it.

Personally, I blame fairy tales for all that, what we were brought up with "and they lived happily ever after" LOL

I met the father of my child, man of my dreams when I was 34, (while travelling),had my son at 36, and am now a single mother (long time), didn't work out, but that's ok.

You never know what life will bring you, but I am so glad I went for that!

I think finding 'the one' is just fairytale make believe. Especially when you think at least 1 out of 3 marriages fail. And love is normally conditional and very close to hate ...

I'm a single parent with a beautiful DS and I definitely don't feel like I've settled - I'm happier than I've ever been and feel totally liberated by not conforming to all the social rules that some people feel duty bound to live by.

No, don't settle. It's better to be on your own than be with someone you don't really want. Better for both of you, I would think.