This thread is done on a new account, I don't want anyone to find it, it's my thread to just look back on this next week to remind myself I am doing the right thing.
DH or not, I have had enough and I am going, I will be spending the next week sorting myself out and finishing appts etc I already have, making arrangements.
Today was the final straw in a long line of shit. I have one child who has learning difficulties had an appt today for a general check up. As usual as he never bothers with the educational/hopsital appts he went in and totally underplayed it all. Ok for him he is not the one at home all bloody day coping with it, he is not the one who has no life whilst I put mine on hold sat at home coping all day. His early years has extra funding as he has so many issues, so basically DH has gone in and contradicted everything I and his key workers have ever bloody said 
.
I just knew he'd do this, he underplays everything, it's ok though as he can just fuck off to work and forget about it, and I am left sorting it out. I had no choice but to let him take him, usually it would be me at appts.
I am so cross right now, but he never listens, ever. So his response was to call me a fucking retard and maybe I am the one who has issues. Straw/camel/back for me.
He has been verbally nasty before calling me names etc, which has stopped lately as I pulled him up on it, but easily slipped back I see.
His problem is he thinks he knows it all, he thinks he knows everything and under plays everything. This is the guy who when I was sick with gestational diabetes, which included many a hospital visit, bought me chocloates to help. Most might think ahhhhh how lovely, I think if he ever bloody listened to me and knew the seriousness of my condition he wouldn't have done that. Just a couple of examples of how he plays everything down and has no bloody clue when he thinks he does.
Sure remaining calm is important, but just not listening, or pretending it's all ok as you are always right, even if you are not so acting like a cold eejit is not good.
Don't get me wrong he is a lovely guy, most of the time, others he is a complete shit and really nasty, speaks to me like crap etc. As much as I love him, I have come to realise, the good times don't outweigh the bad for me anymore I don't want to carry on like it, it's dragging me down and has been for a couple of years.
I could go on writing lists of all the things he has said and done, then turns it around to me as me being unreasonable. All the times I have been a hassle when it's him just not listening to me, all the other stuff, I could go on all day but for now I am done.
I just know now the fact I love him and the fact, he can be mr nice guy is not enough. I want my life back, with the kids, I'd rather be by myself than be with him, I know this now.
I'll sort out all the big stuff another time, I just want out into a private rent so any tips would be I would be greatful :)