All they go on about is sex, are they all like this then?

[DogDays]

On a bit of dodgy ground with DP lately and stupidly found myself chatting to the ex via facebook. I hadn't spoken to him for a couple of years and the convo went like this:

Ex: "Hi! how are you??"
me: "ok thanks, you?"
Ex: "good, good ... "
me: "good"
ex: "so what you been upto?"

blah blah - the usual pleasantries ... fast forward 10 minutes in -

ex: "Well, I woke up in a funny mood, its erm ... been a while if you see what I mean "
me: "oh right "
ex "must admit, our sex was good, wasn't it?"
me: "I'm going to get going now, stuff to do"
ex "oh, ok, take care"

So basically now, whenever I speak to ex via facebook or msn he brings the conversation around the sex within 10 minutes. So I stopped talking to him and decided to try harder with DP. Last night we decided to get a bath together, he's crap with conversation and being in the bath together usually entices a good convo from him. Needless to say, within 20 minutes it was constant sexual innuendos, nagging me to do stuff to him, asking if he could do stuff to me .. why does it always turn to sex talk??? are men actually incapable of having a normal conversation that doesn't involve sex? sometimes I wonder if that's all I'm good for as far as men are concerned.

Umm, OP did say in her OP "he's crap with conversation and being in the bath together usually entices a good convo from him". So even if your DP equates kit off = sex, maybe hers always had lovely long, chatty baths with his mummy and feels safe there?

Whatever. DogDays, I'm afraid I don't think it's a coincidence that DP suddenly comes over all bathtime-sexy just after your tacky little chat with your ex. Granted, X was being sleazy & pathetic. He clearly hasn't had a shag in aeons and has regressed to the sexual age of 15, or is a misogynist twat who can't think past a woman's vagina when communicating with her. Well rid, either way

But ... being fancied is kinda sexy, isn't it, even if it's by a twunt with no brain. Or else, why would we secretly hope the builders will whistle? Caveat: I am now offically OLD, and it's true you grow out of that! So somebody has just treated you like a Sex Object. So maybe you feel a little bit like a Sex Object. So - you see where this is going, don't you? - maybe you acted a little bit more Sexy. You know, maybe your head was going "Need To Talk" and another part was going "Oooh, but I'm Sexy!"

Short version: Of course not All Men Only Want One Thing. Your ex does, maybe, and god help his next mistake. Your DP, though, he loves & respects you in all your guises I hope :)
Have your chat over the kitchen table, or the garden dead-heading. Then take your clothes off & ravish him?

Why don't you just shag him!! Treat hinm like a sex object - it's quite refreshing. :)

Put him in the bath on his own in the dark and leave saying, 'I will come back when you are ready to TALK'

TBD - best plan ever