Does a mum have a right to be selfish?

[beammesomewhereelsescotty]

I don't really know what I want to say here. Have namechanged. More and more, recently, I feel like maybe I've made a massive mistake by marrying my dh. I do love him but there have been so many issues over the years that I don't really want to get into, that I feel like I can probably never be completely happy with him.

Then there are the day to day issues with sometimes drive me insane..not asking how my day was only how the kids were (I'm a sahm) feeling like the last of his priorities, the only issues he ever raises are to do with not having enough sex, not helping at home etc..

So I guess my question is should I just be happy with my lot? Maybe I'll never be happier anyway. I do love him, as do my kids. I just don't know what I have a right to expect from life.

Well the 1st thing is to takeup these issues with him.

The second (and this may not be a popular opinion) is to think about getting a job or doing something (pref. paid) outside the house so that you get a breather and relaise there is more to life than your home and immediate family.

Have you been a sahm long?

How you feel about yourself and your relationship changes so much after having dc and giving up work.

You do end up feeling unappreciated. Maybe you need to talk to your dh and let him know exactly how you feel.

Would you consider counselling? It is a good chance for you both to talk through your problems/issues.

moondog has a really good point.

I felt much better about myself when I started to work again and wished I done it alot earlier. I only do 4hrs a day but I am not just Mum when I am there, I am me and I love it (and the money!).