I've just called it all off...

[BuzzingNoise]

after five years of engagement (even though I always refer to him as dh on here), I've called it all off.
I'm sick of his mood swings, the lack of conversation, the lack of warmth, and the aggression when I try to get an answer out of him.
I just wanted some hand holding really. I'm a long way from family and I don't have any friends nearby. I want a good cry.

i'm so sorry to hear this :-( you are so brave and strong by doing it though and in the long term will be happier. you will find someone who deserves you!

Poor you. :( Try not to feel too awful, I'm sure you've thought long and hard about your decision. Chin up.. tomorrow's another day.

thanks. It has been on the cards for a long time.

(Hand-holds with slightly sweaty palms - warm office)
Well done on being so brave BuzzingNoise, be kind to yourself. Can you book something to look forward to, like a pedicure or something? I know it won't make things better, but will give you something to look forward to and the physical touch of a foot massage will help to relax you.

Big hugs.

I'm sorry ...but well done for being brave. It's very hard to walk away from a long relationship, but worth it in the end.. and far better than looking back and wishing you had later on in marriage.

I second comtessa.. be kind to yourself, cosset yourself for a while.. good books, DVDs, think about the things you can do as a single person..:)

Hang in there!

Well done for being so brave and having the courage to end what sounds like a miserable and desperately unhappy relationship.

It's terrible that you have no-one near by. I can relate to that .

Whereabouts are you in W Yorks? I'm in Leeds if you fancy a coffee/trip to the park? I'm not a nutter promise .

So sorry to hear this Buzzing

It's hard but in the wrong long it will be for the best if it's going to make you happy.

*long run, sorry.

so sorry to hear that. You must be in bits! You have done the right thing, you'll see! All the best, and shout if you need hand holding whenever you need it!

thanks :-) we barely spoke last night and he left early for work this morning. I don't think he's surprised, or bothered. Surely if he was bothered he'd want to talk things through?
I rushed into this relationship after a previous one ended. I won't be making the same mistake again.
Bunny, I'm in Wakefield, on the Leeds side.

It took a lot of courage, so you've already proved to yourself that you can handle what is coming up next. How are you going to sort out the practical side, if you are living together at the moment?

Men dont seem to want to talk about things, ime anyways.
He will either be secretly relived that it's over, or hoping that you start a converstation with him.

One thing I would suggest though, is, if it is over for good, try not to live together any longer than neccessary, its the worst thing to do.

Oh, congratulations! I know how much courage it takes (I didn't have enough) - you'll be surprised how many people respect you for having the honesty & dignity to end it.

Wishing you an easy(ish) transition, with gin & Galaxy as required

knickers you are right. Sadly we're tied into a tenancy, but I will start looking for somewhere for me (and the dogs) in September, when I start work again and have an income. I'll need to be strong to actually walk out and leave him to sort out his own financial messes on his own wages.

one bit of advise, dont let him go down the emotional route of 'if you leave i wont be able to afford to live/eat/have a roof over my head'
i am currently getting this with regards to tax credits and sometimes the guilt trips can be horrible.
Get onto the council first thing and let them know the current situation, i know there arnt that many two beds in our area but the should budge you up a catagory hopefully.

yes I will speak to them. I'll go to the office in town.