I?m fifty, divorced and been living with New Man for two years. We?ve been through quite a bit ? unemployment, death of parent, new job stresses, divorce, various illnesses. We get on very well although we?re very different people: for example, I?m livelier - he likes a calmer life; he likes routine, I don't.
Sex WAS great at first. Then, with all the life-stuff, it waned a bit and now.. maybe once/twice a month. He?s happy with it. I?m not. Whenever I bring up the subject he says I?m criticising him, that I?m making ?demands?, that he?s tired etc.
I just don?t know what to do. I love him so much but this is just eating away at me. I go to bed first usually. He follows, groans a lot (from tiredness!) then falls asleep. I lie there, frustrated. How sad is that? He also drinks 1.5 bottles of wine a night ? that can?t help!
He tells me he loves me ? daily, more than daily in fact. We kiss, chastely. Again not good enough for me. I can?t remember when he last kissed me properly ? he pulls away. We hold hands, we talk, he's nice to me ? that?s all good but I want more. Is that wrong? Should I be happy with what I?ve got?
I just don?t know what to do.. help me please.
(I know he absolutely would refuse to seek ?help? from relate or anyone.)