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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Feel hurt and used by DH.

2 replies

Rossco · 13/07/2010 10:19

DH was circumcised 3 weeks ago for medical reasons. Within days of the op he was like a randy teenager but obviously couldn't take part in full on activities.

Instead we found new and inventive ways to enjoy ourselves and for 2 weeks couldn't keep our hands off each other. It was like being back in the early days of our relationship again.

I knew we couldn't live like that forever but we had fun and lots of it.

Then came the day when he was able to have very careful sex. Now he's dropped me like a hot potato. There is no touching, no affection and he just doesn't seem bothered any more.

It's as though all the sex games were just to reassure himself that he could still enjoy himself and that the minute he was able to climax and realise his willy does still work that was it.

It was like going from 100 miles an hour to 0 in a split second, all or nothing.

I know in the grand scheme of things this is a minor issue but I still feel hurt and a bit used, as though I was his plaything and now he is in working order again I'm not needed as often as he doesn't need reassured.

And no he is no longer in pain, his stitches are gone and sex wasn't painful for him.

OP posts:
RudeEnglishLady · 13/07/2010 10:29

Sorry - you sound sad. I don't know if this is any use to you but maybe its like something me and the girls were talking about at the weekend. We had noticed that the men seem to get a cycle -like they want sex every day for a couple of weeks, then a period of not so bothered but quite happy to and then maybe a whole week where they feel a bit tired and whiney and don't want to do anything at all. Then its back on again the next week. Maybe this is a natural slump after the frenzied activity and he'll be back on form in a few days? I'd try not to take it personally but I know thats hard.

staryeyed · 13/07/2010 10:29

tell him how you feel. He may not realise how his behaviour has been interpreted.

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