Archers thread #161: Kenton seems to be getting better, but the storylines aren’t. Discuss The Archers here.

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Well, here we are. I was strongly tempted to go for the dog's dinner, dog/human bullies etc suggestions for the title, but Mere asked if we could not have anything graphic in the thread title, so I've held back. In a couple of weeks when this thead is nearing its end the attack may all be a distant memory, anyway.

Goodness knows what's in store for us now. Kenton seems likely to have PTSD, not surprisingly. Surely we must soon find out why HARRY talks so. Unconvincingly. Alice! Hello. CHRIS. CHRIS. etc, and also whether he is (as many of us suspect) addicted to opiates and/or up to no good. Too much to hope why nobody in Ambridge horsey circles had ever heard of him until recent weeks.

Over to you!

I remember her saying it was 30 years ago when she told Vince.

Presumably nothing to stop Harrison passing off anything in the public domain, especially if he can hand her a sheaf of newspaper cuttings.

Would be worth finding out why he’s no longer eventing. Was it really “an injury”?

Fell off a horse while drunk?

Wearing a mankini

I saw a fake wysteria arch around the doorway of a hairdressers today!

That would be the good explanation. I wondered whether "barred from prestigious competition because of drunkenness".

I still think the SWs don’t get how gossipy and close knit the horse world is. Famous rider gets done for drink driving? Everyone would know about it. A low ish-level rider near me was involved in a scandal and it was the talk of the area for months.

I bloody knew Harry was a wrong’un. Too charming, too jolly and high handed, too perfect and just too good to be true. And then we saw the real Harry: the manipulative drunk who will lie and threaten to protect his access to alcohol and hide the truth.

Poor Alice.

If I were Harrison I would have said ‘ok. I’ll tell Alice what I know and add on that you threatened to speak to your contacts if I did. I’m sure that will endear you to her’

You can be barred from competition for failing a drug test, plus there are further disciplinary issues if you were deemed to have put the horse at risk because you were riding drunk. Cross-country is dangerous enough at the best of times without doing it pissed.

Probably no longer in eventing because he lost his sponsorship ? But everyone in that competitive discipline would know ( and there would be a small item in Horse and Hound)...

Has Alice not googled him?

One would imagine someone like Vince would find it impossible to keep a straight face when Tony starts bleating on about being a bit tipsy on his birthday.......

All Harrison has to do is keep his eyes open and alert his colleagues next time Harry lurches into his car. Harry's a real twat if he hasn't worked that one out.

I cannot for the life of me fathom why Natasha's decided on the cow hide idea on the basis that one customer told her he liked the sheepskins hanging up in another café. I do hope Mia finds out.

Maybe Jolene had an affair/fling (no idea when she and Kenton got together) with Markie.

I saw a picture of the Harrison actor yesterday - completely different from how I imagine him. I see Harrison as stocky with a beard but he's actually very good looking .

I think the noise deadening issue for the cafe is a good one to bring up. I hate restaurants and cafes where everything is hard, noise reflective surfaces. The noise is just as Tony described it. I’ve definitely been in cafes in Scandinavia where there are reindeer skins on the seats and probably the walls so I can see where Natasha sees a link.
Cowhide rugs are a thing - you can buy a fake one in Dunelm so they can’t be that astonishingly off piste. We should make use of every part of an animal - it is respectful. It would be good to have local ways of processing hides rather than shipping them round the world too. I think this is quite a thoughtful little sub-story which says something about farming and food production. Maybe Natasha will start a craft tannery.
I thought it was interesting to hear Tony talking about wanting to visit the abattoir as well. You can’t be squeamish as a farmer, ask Jeremy Clarkson.

I have no idea about modern tanning processes, but traditionally, they were at the outside of towns for the stench. Hides were soaked in large pits of stinky liquid, which I have a vague idea could include dog shit mixed in. I assume these days it's in large, mostly clean-looking factories, but still probably not a very lovely process. Not one you'd want next to a tearoom, at any rate.

Agreed on all points! I assume fake sheepskin or leather is made from plastic, which isn't great environmentally.

Has Alice not googled him? Well, quite.

Modern tanning is still quite chemical, it seems. Though with less soaking in dung-filled water.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tanning

I think this is quite a thoughtful little sub-story which says something about farming and food production - I agree @Chemenger. Interesting that all the hides from the abattoir are sent abroad for processing.
I assume fake sheepskin or leather is made from plastic, which isn't great environmentally - not necessarily. This company, for instance, https://moea.io/pages/material-choice] uses plant based materials (cactus, grape, apple, corn, pineapple etc) and prides itself on being low-carbon.

I visited a tannery in Morocco once. It stunk to high heaven! They used pigeon shit and ( human) urine in the process which explained a lot. If they installed one at Bridge farm it would drive all the customers of the Te Rum away.

This must be the tannery Tony found:
https://www.jfjbaker.co.uk/

Can’t stocky people with beards be good looking then?

Maybe Natasha will start a craft tannery Isn’t urine involved in traditional tanning? Could see that as a diversification, fit in nicely with visitor toilets.

I assume fake sheepskin or leather is made from plastic. Yes usually, hence “pleather”