if there was a real murder in Ambridge, who, where, what with and why?

[iwastooearlytobeayummymummy]

David, in the milking parlour, a photo of Jude wrapped round lead coated milk cluster,because he's a twunt and, and I HATE HIM

No, not Will, that would send Helen into another bout of depression/eating disorder etc., bring an horrific end to her pregnancy and generally give her far too much airtime.

I actually don't mind Kathy that much either. She is whingy and creepily over-upset about Sid, but I think she should be cut a bit of slack for having to pretty much look after 2 teenagers as Kenton is such a loser.

I was going to suggest Jenny should be the victim before Alice and Chris came home with their big news. Now she is absolutely insufferable (as well as being so two dimensional and predictable), but I think she'd be better off as the murderer, so that I could then hear her having to associate with working class Horrobins in jail! I can imagine her going over the edge with planning this party and killing Susan in an Aga related incident, possibly then serving her up in a stew to Brian, Ruairi and hopefully the dreadful Kate!