Heart or Head When Choosing House?

[Evenstar]

Well, having finally sold my house earlier this week after 6 months on the market I now have to find somewhere else to live. I have viewed 7 houses and conclusively rejected 4 of those. I have 1 that I have mentally allocated as a B choice and 2 that I really like for different reasons and I am struggling to choose between them.

Property 1 is a Victorian detached house, with one off road parking space and permit controlled residents parking space in the road. It has large high ceilinged rooms and is mostly in good decorative order and has lovely wooden floors and good carpets. The biggest downside for me is that the energy rating isn't great and one of my major reasons for downsizing is to reduce the gas and electricity bills. It has a conservatory and a really pretty garden. I could also keep the huge dining table that has come from my late husband's family.

Property 2 is 1950's semi detached opposite a lovely park, with 3 off road parking spaces and a garage. It is largely in good decorative order, but has a few things that are definitely odd, like a sliding patio door into the porch and a utility room with no ceiling. It has a lovely homely feel and a private garden with a space that would lend itself to a conservatory.

I am feeling very drawn to property 1 but I think property 2 would be the sensible choice with the off road parking and being cheaper to heat etc. When my husband was here we complemented each other well with these decisions as he put the head side, I just seem to be going over both sides in my mind and not getting any further.

ANy difference in price?

Has the Victorian one got thr original windows?

And how long are you planning to live there? If it's short term you want the one that is easiest to sell on again...

Both houses double glazed and I am planning to live there possibly until retirement which is 20+ years. The Victorian house is around £10,000 more, but both have been on market for a while and I think they would accept lower offers anyway.

Off road parking is great if you have lots of visitors. Also heating the newer house will be cheaper.

But then I am a 'head house' person because I think it is all your stuff and you living there that makes it a home.

I know that I could make either of them into a lovely home, it is just that I have fallen in love with the beautiful big bedroom and the spacious reception rooms in the Victorian house, it is so pretty as well and I can visualise my lovely table in the dining room and it will have to go to auction if I buy the other house There is the option to buy a booklet of one day permits for parking when visitors come which works out to under £1 a day

No , my heart rules my head.I think you will know immediately whether a house feels right for you.If you have strong feelings about neither then look at more.I would go for the first one personally.

There are no more to look at anyway, and I really like them both, just something about the Victorian one is calling to me even though I know the other is a more practical choice and will be cheaper to run

So, um, I think you may have decided!

I'm really sorry, I have no idea about your backstory, and I am so sorry for your loss.

I think that if keeping the table is that important to you, then you should find house where you can keep the table. There is no shame in wanting this at all. The first house sounds great and I don't ever think you will rue the day where you chose energy bills over the table.

Thanks Mbear, I am thinking of getting my friend who viewed property 1 with me today to come and view property 2 as I had to go on my own to see that yesterday. Perhaps a second viewing would make it really clear in my mind.

The otherthing I was going to say was that if proprty 2 has a garage, then you could keep the table until you maybe build that conservatory you mentioned? Just a thought - which I am sure you have had!

It is property tennis, back and forth, back and forth..

we lived in an old victorian terrace with high ceilings. it was NEVER warm enough in winter. we both worked, so didn't have heating on much, but i was a teacher & spent a lot of feb half term under the bed covers, doing marking,as i couldn't get warm.

mind you, it had ancient heating & no double glazing.

what dc's do you have - are you likely to have a time when there will be more demand for parking & them fighting over who gets to park where?

maintenance is also v hard with high ceilings & far more expensive/difficult. will you have to do that yourself?

not trying to influence your decision, but think about what you will have to do in the house for the next 20 years, and work out which one will be better. hate to say it, but you're unlikely to get MORE able to climb ladders to change light bulbs/brush cobwebs etc.

view BOTH properties again. as you go round, think, 'can i reach that bit' type questions.

as long as they have the space... heart. a house has to sing to you iykwim and i dont think there's any passion for no 2.

can you post photos?

I have three teenagers, but one is off to university this year and the other one hopefully next year. DS1 can drive but will not be able to afford to run a car and has a friend to stay with during the vacations in our current location. DD cannot drive yet, and has said she will not get a car until she is working, also you can get a second permit. DS2 is only 13, so probably not something I need to worry about yet with him. Mbear I don't think the conservatory is going to be on a scale to accomodate the table sadly, it requires a mininum room length of over 12 feet just to be able to pull the carver chairs out enough to sit down. kickassangel you make some very valid points about maintenace etc and I will have to give that some serious thought. The heating issue is one of the main reasons I want to move, we are so fed up of being cold here because we can't afford the heating on such a large house, we don't want to end up being out of the frying pan into the fire so to speak.

I would rather not post photos, as it would mean people who know me in real life could identify me, I really do like the second property too, if I felt totally neutral towards it, the decision would be easier. I just fear making the heart decision and finding that financially and practically it was the wrong thing for me and for us as a family, it is a very expensive mistake to put right if we end up having to move again.

are you interested in the longer term value of the property?

Well I think the answer to that would have to be yes, but I am well aware that there are huge falls in house prices forecast over the next few years. At the moment I think I need to focus on it as a home, whilst hoping that when I near retirement IF I want to move that it will have risen in value and given me some options for relocating to a cheaper area and releasing some equity.

Also, if you will be living there on your own (eventually) is one of them less 'lonely'? The house obviously has to fit your needs now, but also in 15-20 yrs time.

Some aspects are great if there are 4 of you, not so good for 1 or 2 etc.

Are they local enough so you can drive round at different times of day/week to get a feel for area? The park opposite the 2nd house mitt be great, but a local teenage hangout on a sat night etc. Permit parking on 1st house with 2 cars might seem fine, but if anything like the streets near me, an absolut frigging nightmare after 6 mon to fri (ie when everyone is home)

Another issue that might be 'clouding' your judgement, is if you have always been drawn to certain types of houses, therefore it is natural to feel more comfortable around the one type of house. So the property isn't actually 'better' just easier to imagine yourself in.

I would always prefer the vistorian over the modern (ish) semi, but that is what we are in as it suits all our needs for a very long time, not just now. Once you get home from work and close your front door, you normally think of cups of tea, what to have for dinner and the sofa and tv, rather than admiring your own lovely ceilings!!

We are in the process of selling our 'heart' house - a Victorian semi with one allocated parking space - in favour of a 'head' house - a 1950's semi with driveway and garage.

The main reason for this is the parking. It is great having one allocated space outside the house. Until one or both of the neighbours encroach too closely into our space and I cannot get my car in. I then have to find a space some walking distance away.
Sadly this happens very often and all the cars in our road have scrapemarks on the bumpers from people trying to wedge their cars into any space available. It is the main cause of neighbourly arguments.
Over time, I have fallen out of love with this house. Because it just is not practical anymore.

So we are in the process of buying a much blander house, but with parking and a garage. And I am already planning all sorts of things to make it 'mine'

I have always liked period properties, but haven't always bought one when we moved house. We chose not to buy a beautiful house that had parts dating back to the 15th century and had oak floors throughout as we recognised that it would be a nightmare to heat and it only looked so good because of the vast quantity of wonderful antique furniture that the current owners had in there. That was a joint decision, so I am able to be practical about these things. I am hoping that I might not be alone for ever, I do have a new relationship but we are a way off the moving in together stage largely for financial and practical reasons. I think property 2 would be cosier and less lonely if I do end up living alone after DS2 leaves.

The parking is a big issue and I do recognise that, my brother has a very nice car and I am not certain that he would be happy to park it on the road and one off road space is not big enough to accomodate it. As he lives some distance away that could be a problem.

I think another thing to think about is how, long term, each of the issues you have with each house, will annoy you. For example, you can fix the sliding patio door and the utility roof, but you can't put in lower ceilings if it does turn our expensive to heat, and you can't magic up more car parking if that does start to annoy. Does the permit parking apply at certain times -can someone just pop over if they feel like it, or does it need to be prearranged with you, so you have a permit waitng etc.

Looking longer term, you will have 1 car, possible 2nd from your kids and possible third car from the person you are seeing.... never mind family / friends etc. It all adds up.

But as I said, I am a head house person.

as a general rule, period houses rise disproportionately in value over non.. but there are of course exceptions to all rules!

On the basis of the situation we are in I would say definitely buy house 1. Too many reasons not too imo.

You don't have to heat each room if that helps.

Everything with property 2 is fixable and I do really like it, the car parking is a huge issue I know. Property 2 as well as having garage and 3 off road spaces has the car park for the park straight across the road which is free and open 24/7 so there would always be somewhere for visitors to park. People could "pop over" to property 1, but I would need to keep a book of daily permits to hand for them to use

can't you install 1 or 2 wood burners into house 1? that should help a lot with the heating, you'd definitely see your money back over 20 years

Are you allowed woodburners if you live in a smokeless zone, plus the fireplace has been removed in one of the downstairs rooms? I am also planning to increase my work hours considerably after the move so there would be nobody home to stoke up the woodburner for large parts of the day and I am not sure I would want the extra housework.