Hi there! My DH, my 2 sons and 3 cats, moved from a very well located and nice Appaertment in the area Poblenou, Barcelona, to a house in a village with a huge garden and a basketball area. Outside is BIG! Inside very small...
Our flat in Poblenou (really nice area in Barcelona I highly recommend you to visit) was refurbished, brand new kitchen and bath, Parket floor, ceramic tiles in the kitchen, we choose the materials and contracted a very professional bricklayer and plumber. The flat was nice, the sun day caming in the leaving room, located 15 min walking to the beach, even if we weren't going often, we could feel the breeze from the sea in our rooms...just beautiful.
Nevertheless, was not everything positive, kids room had not so much natural light, my partner couldn't work with wood as he had not a workshop to build stuff, and the bad smell wafting up from the cat litter was unbearable. My dear husband was complaining every day about the impact noise pollution and contamination was having on him. He grow up in France until he was 11 then he moved to the UK where he spent more than 20 years, living mainly in the country side. Having a house with garden in the UK, is a pretty normal thing that almost everyone can afford. Whilst here in Barcelona, being able to afford the Gadren is something only rich people can do, unless you move to a village.
In the apartment we had in Barcelona, I was feeling happy, shops were close, supermarkets also, we had 15 minutes walk to the beach, and we didn't need to look up in the web for plans very often, as there were thousands of events nearby. Working in the street there, was very different as it is here. There, you were anonymous, whilst here in the village, almost everybody knows you, you see everyday the same faces, which wouldn't be a problem if they would be more open minded, but that's not the case...
Having leaved in Barcelona for a long time, having interacted with people from all around the world, with different point of views, different mentalities, backgrouns and different goals, it feels a bit difficult to adapt here, where most of them have only one or two nationalities, and a narrow perspective of life. Being negative or pessimistic about "village life" is very bad viewed in a village,
they idealise it here, and are not open for seeing different points of view.
After more than 1 year complaints from my DH about noise and pollution in the city, about the cat's litter smell in the flat and the stress behavior he had towards our big son (DH justified it saying is bcuz they don't have a garden they shout so loud and he gets stressed) I decided following his desire to go out of the city and moving to a house with garden, parking place and a workshop. This took me more than one year to decide since we first planned about moving out the city, as I was scared about how could I manage living in the country side without a car, far away from people and shops, and being dependent of a bus that passes every 3 hours. Now I understand all this fears...life here is not what I'm used to, I'm out of my comfort zone and find it difficult to relax here and find joy. It is paradoxal, as it would make more sense to feel relaxed in a quite place like that then in an apartment in the city, but this is not the case... I feel here less vitality and energy (even if the quality of the air is better here) and I'm suffering from anxiety and episodes of depression since we moved here. Sometimes I think, this won't happen to me if I would be more skilled in DIY, kneeting, and things like that, but even this I prefer to do it with people than alone. I'm 36, still dreaming on going to the Uni, or having my own business in a crowded place, I love to see people, and know that there are human beings walking anytime in the streets next to my flat, I'm not such a fan of nature, animals and silence, I rather prefer the interaction with people anytime I want it, not just when the bus schedule wants it.
My DH has a very demanding job, which envolves daily meetings that require preparation so he needs to be in a quite place like that. He hates being inside and loves being outside, moving, building, stretching his arms without restrictions, he feels free here, and would feel very happy if it was bcuz of my daily complaints about the opposite feelings I have about it.
We both are lacking vitality, he looks older than before because of me feeling miserable all he time here. I want to feel better here but not sure if I can. Need to find a job first and then see...but I'm scared about picking up the children on time once working so far from the village. Well maybe it's not the distance what concerns me, but the bus schedules. Even if it takes 10 min. with the car, with a bus that passes every 3 hours, is a different history...
Maybe I should focus on the driving license before looking for a job. I don't know why we humans complicate life so much, I would love to be less scared and more positive thinker.
"Urban people or village people", does that really exist or is an invention of our brains? Getting out of your comfort zone is tricky but maybe helps us to grow and mature. What do you think?