To the people who owned a house AFTER me, I'd like to confess and apologise for...

[Tinker]

...hiding a damp patch on a wall with a big book

getting the boiler "fixed" so that it limped on for another month or so apparently

leaving a garden table (because we were being so kind!) because the 4th leg was just propping it up and broken.

Anyone else want to, ahem, get anything off their chest?

Well We'll be cash-strapped. I know I'll want to change it but it wouldn't be a priority. I'll be kicking myself when we get the keys and there is something hideous on the floor.

Very funny that atleast there isn't a hole underneath.

Waitingforbedtime - can I buy your house please? You sound lovely.

I am lovely and they took advantage

waiting - that's lovely, what you did. I was thinking about leaving a bottle of wine and some milk for our buyers when we leave the house (assuming they don't try and shaft us between now and then!) since they offered us the asking price before I had a chance to haggle with them!

I'd like to apologise for the rubbish painting in this house. Colours are fine but neither of us are much cop and the ceiling has streaks from the walls round the edges. And the misjudged yellow in the dining room that we repainted cream still shows through because DH doesn't 'believe' in second coats.

Oh, and the once-pristine carpet in the living room has many many brown marks from dropped apple cores and juice, courtesy of DS, but we didn't make any attempt to hide that and you also have a young child.

DH and his mate and FIL put in the (second hand) kitchen cabinets. Sorry about that. (They are slightly crooked though I'm the only one who can see it, apparently.)

We are fed up with the neighbour's lad and his mates parking all over the place. And with the multiple trade vehicles of the people opposite. And with the helicopters overhead. But you'll have noticed them, surely?