Selling before buying and moving in with mum while downsizing

[bringonyourwreckingball]

I am selling the family home which I stayed in for 3 years post divorce so the kids could finish up their education with some stability. They will both be at Uni in September so I am downsizing. I accepted an offer on my house but have had 2 offers on new houses rejected and currently have nowhere to go. It’s looking like I will be putting all my furniture in storage and moving in with my mum until I find somewhere to buy. Has anyone done similar and do you have any tips on how to approach this? We have been decluttering for months but I am struggling now with deciding what to keep and what to get rid of whilst not knowing what I will need/have space for long term.

I know when we put all that f downstairs into storage for major building work, half went to the tip/sold afterwards

wished we’d just off loaded before hand and saved on storage

Get rid of as much as you can. I paid £20k storage over two years. I'm now moving again but I'm not storing beyond a garage.
It's difficult to know which bits of furniture you need ( wardrobes or will they be fitted etc) but just take what you love. Anything just in case will cost you money.
Market place is very active where I live.

I agree. Keep essentials like a sofa and beds and any free standing storage but if there’s furniture bought specifically for your bigger house try and sell it now.

Hi OP

I always advocate selling and renting rather than selling buying in the standard way, it saves a massive amount of stress even if only a few weeks difference.

However, how do your DCs feel about this? You’re selling their home at a time when they will be feeling quite vulnerable. Where do they “come home to”? Where do they call home?
For them it really could feel like you couldn’t wait to get rid of them. I get you stayed in a home you want to move on from for them, and this move is for you. I do wonder if the timing is wrong though.

re living with your Mum, enjoy it, accept it will be frustrating at times, relish the time with her.
as others have said, perhaps only keep things you are very attached to, this could be a complete new start.

I don’t have much choice about selling, or the timing, I can’t afford to buy my ex out of his remaining share of the equity. The kids are fine about the move, it has just been me and dd2 in a 5 bedroom house for the past couple of years and we both felt we were rattling around a bit. I had hoped to be buying somewhere they had viewed with me but that hasn’t worked out. They do know that I am looking for something with their needs in mind and I am staying local so they will be near their friends when they come home for Christmas. They have viewed 4 or 5 houses with me and we are all clear that I am only buying something which will suit all of us as a family home.

Having had to do this a couple of times - storage through your removers will likely be a cheaper option. You have no access to the stuff though and probably not long term - we did it when we had a gap between completing on sale and moving in to new home. Actual storage units where you can get things in and out probably better if longer term but be ruthless - after the cheap headline rate it becomes very expensive. For anything you don’t love cheaper to get rid and buy again when you are ready to move in to your new home.

Also please remember this will be an adjustment for your mum too; be kind!

We moved into a property we had to renovate so although we were living in it, anything non essential went in FIL loft (luckily it was huge and barely used). It was mainly all the ‘keep for sentimental reasons’ stuff like DD old school books etc. We got rid of sofas etc and sat on garden furniture for a year. As we have come to move ‘sentimental’ things back in we’ve realised they can be thrown away but at the time emotions were heightened because of moving etc. I’d have been furious if we’d have paid for storage for furniture especially if downsizing as it might not fit.

Be extremely appreciative towards your DM!

Oh, I am. But it was her idea and ultimately she is looking out for her grandchildren. I need time to find the right house that lets us move forward to the next chapter positively. We all had to deal with my breast cancer at the same time as the divorce and the kids going through exam years - I really need this to be a positive move for all our sakes and my mum totally gets that.

Gosh you've had an awful lot happening. That's so lovely of your DM to be there for you and the DGC. Don't forget to care for yourself, it's so easy to forget with everything else going on.