Selling without Estate Agent? Yes or no?

[Loveapostitnote]

So parents are potentially looking to downsize in the near future and have asked me to get a couple of valuations from local estate agents to start the ball rolling with the sale of theirs. We’ve had 2 of 3 done so far.
Parents (both early 80s) have spoken to someone they know (mums nail tech) whose son would be ‘very interested’. Mum has now decided that this is the route to go. No estate agent needed and it’s going to be straight forward once he knows what price they’re thinking. Is she being naive or am I looking for problems where there aren’t any? He will be a first time buyer but no idea what his budget is or what his buying position will be.
I don’t want to get involved, mum is quite a contradictory character so whatever I say/think will be wrong!

@Loveapostitnote I think continuing to leave them to their own devices is absolutely the best way to go. The only two scenarios are - they won't ever move or they do move and it is very messy. From what you say, there won't be a 'they did it their way and it all turned out fine' scenario.

Thanks all….. @globalwondering thank you for your input as an EA. I will strongly be suggesting they go with an EA. I have too many other things in my life to do this on their behalf and in any case, as you’ve all gathered, it wouldn’t be the right thing in their eyes anyway.

The private sale hasn’t come to fruition so they are still sitting dithering as to whether to go with EA or just not sell and stay put. They would benefit from selling and downsizing so I am sitting and waiting to see what they decide. I will support them as best I can through the process, of course, but I have made it clear it is up to them as to the timescales. I’ve spent a lot of time lurking on elderly parents topic board and feel comfy with my boundaries.

Thanks all for your input. It’s been helpful 😊

If the nail tech’s friend’s son is interested in the house, it sounds like nail tech’s been gossiping. Dodgy.

I disagree with @Rockfrock

I asked my mum if she wanted some "moral support" this summer(ie me to kick her out of inertia)
she said yes and i phoned a few agents and arranged back to back visits and then let her pick from the quotes. Its now on the market (with fuck all offers but ultimately we are on the downhill roll now)

Once its on the market the ball is rolling. I'd accept they need help and just support them to get it done...

I also have started conversations around value.... 10k more is fine - who cares if it nets you the perfect place... equally £40k cheaper but a poor location? 40k buys A LOT of taxis.

Money is just energy

I’m glad for you @SalmonOnFinnCrisp -that sounds ideal- but if the OP has had to hang out on the Elderly Parents’ board then it’s very likely her parents blow hot and cold over issues others take in their stride.

Sums it up. Hot and cold, inconsistent, flakey…..pick your phrase basically! Makes it incredibly difficult to support and as much as I’m all for it, everything has to be at their pace and very much their decision. My support is often seen as interference (DMs word) so I’m a firm boundaries kinda gal.
And yes, elderly parents area is definitely my hang our space 🥴

You're a star @Loveapostitnote keep those boundaries and your sanity!

we have deliberately wide-swerved a prospective purchaser who refuse to put their house on the market until they've had a viewing of ours. We wouldn't want them as a buyer even if they did put their house on the market first. They've shown us who they are just by their inability to compromise and see our perspective.

When people have lived in their house for decades it is an emotional journey to have to put it on the market, have people looking round, hearing insensitive comments about what they don't like etc. so I really do appreciate the wrench involved. Houses are steeped with memories of families, happy and sad times, lives. Such a challenging time for everyone,

Thank you for your kind words @daisychain01 …..my boundaries are very firm. The elderly parents board is proving incredibly helpful. Just reading about peoples own experiences is invaluable.

I shall sit and see what happens. I shall definitely be gently directing them towards an estate agent and have been very clear that I won’t be willing or able to negotiate or act on their behalf. I’m more than happy to be the person the EA deals with and communicates with, if that’s what DPs want, but all decisions will be it’s but I’ll gladly support and advise if that’s what they want.

Fingers crossed things progress in due course. DPs definitely making the right noises so I’m hopefully they will move and sell up this year, or at least get it in the pipeline given how long some sales can take.

You sound like a lovely DD and I'm sure deep down they appreciate you. It's so difficult 'letting go of what you know' at their age

Thank you @daisychain01 , very kind of you 😊