Small house sadness

[nc909]

Does anyone else in a small house get really sad that their house is small?

we’re only two people and unlikely to have children. So we don’t need a big house. Ours is a small 1930s semi. Combined living and dining space and a small kitchen.

I just get so envious of other people’s kitchens and downstairs toilets and separate dining rooms.

Some people can’t afford a house at all, so just be happy that you have one. Many people will be envious of you.

Just because you don’t have children and don’t need a bigger house, doesn’t mean you can’t buy one if you want one.

I don’t like separate dining rooms, too often Theyre cold and just full of junk thst doesn’t belong anywhere else (says the woman who lives alone in a one-bedroom flat with a toddler…)

Why are you sad? You have somewhere to live when many don’t.

No I love my tiny house. It means my bills are smaller and there is less stuff to clean and maintain.

Think of all the dusting and cleaning. I get house envy whenever I watch a Netflix series.

I used to live in a small semi and really do miss it. Have you thought about getting a downstairs toilet under the stairs?

Alleviate small house sadness by simply buying a bigger house.

Bear in mind though for the bigger house :

The council tax and heating bills will generally be more expensive.
The maintenance costs will be larger.
Cleaning it will take forever.

I understand the desire for more space. But space comes at a cost.

As long as I have decent, quiet neighbours I would happily live in a caravan

Hmm, is this definitely about the house?

We have four of us in a small 3 bed terrace. No separate dining room or downstairs loo. It’s nicely decorated and full of books and art and toys and shoes all over the floor. I’d love a utility room where the shoes and the drying laundry could go, and I sometimes find it inconvenient when we’re all getting out the door, but I don’t feel sad it’s small.

Could this be about missing something else, or home not being pretty/cosy more than about size?

I had a tiny little house when I left exH I had a tiny sofa between two door and would have to shove it to block one door to open the other. I felt "less than" and frustrated at the time. I'm selling it at the minute and I love it every time I walk in. I have a HUGE house at the minute but I'm moving out of.thst too into somewhere middle ground, and I cannot wait to downsize. A big house is alot of work and expensive to decorate and easy to clutter up.

Thats how I feel too. Would love a downstairs toilet, a wider hall and a utility but they would be just nice to haves.
We do have a huge garden so that makes up for it.

If you don't meed a bigger house think if the things you could do with the extra income that would literally go on a 4 wallled box where you shelter.

@nc909 ive never understood the obsession with big houses. To my mind it’s just more cost/debt, more to clean, more room to accumulate stuff you don’t really need. Having enough space to comfortably accommodate the residents of your home should be the aim, not having excess rooms that are left empty most of the time. I’d like to ultimately live in a purpose built tiny house, seems much more practical to me.

My previous property was 45 metres squared. Now, that's small! Yet I loved it to pieces and cried when I sold it, despite the size being truly infuriating at times: knocking into things etc, it was quite cramped living.

Now in a small terraced house, but with a garden. I really like small properties, but maybe you have to be accustomed to them first. There are only two of us (plus cats) so that helps.

I like the cosiness. They're easier to heat and clean. They enforce a certain degree of minimalism in terms of storage which I also like, as I can't but unlimited rubbish to fill it with.

If you're feeling cramped, maybe there are creative ways to free up space or give the illusion of it (colour, etc).

Why not buy a larger house OP?

We had 30s-40s semi. 3 bed, third one single very very single, and it was quite small, but we redesigned downstairs a bit and added toilet and space for washing machine (i hate them in a kitchen). Open plan living worked well because it gave feelimg of so much more space compared to smalp separate rooms. Maybe you could do similar with toilet? It makes it much better when each of you has basically own toilet.
Separate dining rooms are not my thing.

I like it as less to heat and clean and lower council tax.

I understand. We went from a small flat to a small terraced house. The main thing that makes our life difficult is not having anywhere to put stuff. So the house feels cluttered, and it can't be utilised. We have a dining room permanently full of clutter so tends to fail its purpose. We don't actually have loads of stuff, just nowhere to put it. And in that regard want for more space. Having said that, due to clutter, and heating, we tend to gather in one room for most of winter. So our actual spacial use shrinks dramatically. I could tolerate a small bedroom given nothing in it but for a bed and bedside tables. Our kitchen is small (not the smallest), and it's difficult. But it is very used and worked. I visited a friend with a huge kitchen last summer, and he had nothing but a small table at the end of it. Great to waltz around the kitchen. But functionality wise it was still a bit awkward. Two rooms in his house were barely used. That's not to say they weren't wanted or enjoyed. We fail to optimise our living area, but can quite easily want and daydream for more space.

We lived in a 3 Bed semi, and with DC.
We removed the chimney from the dining room (made it much more spacious), and opened it up to the kitchen. It made the entire room, now a kitchen / diner, much more usable and spacious. We added a downstairs toilet with washbasin, under the stairs. It was smallish, but very useful, and the whole house felt much bigger, because we had more usable space.

I live in a small bungalow, two bedrooms a single and a double, small kitchen and small lounge/dining room. It's much smaller than any of my friends but after years of the insecurity of private rentals where the maintenance was often lacking my home now is my security, it is warm, safe and dry. I can be here until I am carted out in a box so no, I am not sad about it. It has so many positives and if people look down on me because of the size of my home then it is their problem not mine.

I actually really want to live in a small house now. Kids have grown up (young adults) and the time to downsize is approaching. Still having more than one loo would be preferred but other than that I just want as small a house as is feasible to live in. I am tired of high heating bills, rooms I don’t have use for anymore, high council tax etc. My dream is to have a very small property but the decor is beautiful and thoughtful (but not expensive).

@Seawolves you have what I dream of, a small bungalow. I currently have a 4 bed detached house with parking for about 3 cars and I just don’t want it anymore. It’s too big and redundant now kids are making their own more independent lives.

I moved from a larger house to a smaller one and it's actually so much better.

I had to donate, dispose of so much furniture. I lost a dining room and very small single but now realise that they had become dumping grounds.

When I look now at photos of my old house I realise that I was just housing stuff that I've disposed of without any detriment. I feel cross at myself for having over bought the stuff in the first place.

Maybe you need a really brutal declutter? I'm going to declutter even further. I read something that made sense to me 'don't buy storage, consider whether you should be storing'.

Now all that I 'store' is summer things in winter and vice versa.

Regarding a large property. They do always appear desirable but can be a nuisance. I was lucky enough to live in a detached house when growing up, on a modest plot. And oddly some of my friends across town lived in larger terraced houses, that were way bigger and more useful inside than ours. Ours was freezing and awkward.

It's only after downsizing that I realised how lucky we were and regret never using the space or the garden better. About the best thing about it was having rooms that were quite well separated from each other. One downside of a small house is not being able to make a noise without disturbing others.

In that detached house we didn't have chimney/features. That made the rooms really dull and boring rectangular boxes. It was a very ugly house. I much prefer chimneys and alcoves, these can be utilised well for shelving or furniture and they have a better aesthetic, even if you don't use the fireplace.

Heating many UK houses is just a waste of hot air as they are built so badly. You can have large spaces that don't cost much to heat if the building fabric is decent.

My husband and I spent some time before we were married writing down what we wanted in a house we have 3 children:
we came up with:
must: have
4 bedroom
garage
2 bathroom
kitchen
could have :
utility room
boot room
study

We looked at what we would afford
£400 K got us a tiny tiny 3 bedroom house and I mean tiny bedroom 1 couldn’t even get a wardrobe in. Double bed and that’s it. We got more and more demoralised.
we realised quickly that the dream to stay mortgage free wasn’t going to get us what we wanted.

We took out a £110 K mortgage and upped our budget - we got everything on our wish list, boot room, study, 3 bathrooms etc and we did get lucky with this house. We did have work to do on it - garden is not level and needs hard work and it came with nothing but it was in our dream area and we overlook trees and ponds and it’s worth well over £700 K now.

You have three choices here:
keep your budget and more cheaper area but this might be not as nice area or work to do on the house
up your budget and get what you want especially if you are prepared to do work
stay put and look at doing a loft, garage conversion and revamping it and being clever with storage solutions and think cosy and clever not same

OP, go oonline for some ideas about making the most of small spaces. There is loads of inspo on tiny flats or homes in Japan. They make small spaces look so enticing.

If you have a bit of money, you could remodel so the kitchen and dining area become one - bright and airy, so the living area is separated and can have a cosier atmosphere.. And it may allow you to add a downstairs loo and small utility area.

Years ago I read that you should treat your home as though you absolutely adore it, however different it is from what you wish you had. It is amazing how, when you declutter and deep clean your home, so every surface and window is gleaming, then fill it with flowers or plants and scents you love - whether candles or oils or just fresh coffee and baking; when you ensure there are defined areas that are as inviting as possible - sofas with throws and cushions, bedside tables with a good book, a pretty lamp, a nice water carafe and glass; kitchen with pretty mugs and pots of fresh herbs on the windowsill - you walk in and feel so good about the place. You feel happy. Try creating beautiful focal points and mood shifts in each part of the house, that draw the eye to things that lift your spirits.

Well you are allowed to buy a bigger house.
We are effectively 3 in a 4 bed house now. But we need 2 "office spaces" to work from. We have a decent kitchen/diner and a lounge, but I'm after a conservatory and eyeing up the integral garage as an extra room as well.

We chose to live a smaller house than we can afford , it’s one of the reasons we could retire early. Agree it’s all about the neighbkurs being okay.