Move to a house that’s SMALLER than current flat but it’s a house?

[HomeLibraryLady]

Would love to hear people’s thoughts and experiences with choices you’ve made with where your family lives.

We have two young kids and currently live in a flat which is really spacious and beautifully done up. Some negatives too.

We are really keen to move to be in a house as we’re desperate to have direct access to a garden and have our own drive way for charging the car.

However, because we want to be close enough to the kids’ school (don’t need to be within catchment but want there to be a bus route from where we live to the school), we’re looking to stay within the city as opposed to the outskirts or just out of town in the commuter area.

This location preference means we get so little house for our money. The houses within our budget would all be in crude terms “worse” than our flat now, they’d have less m2 though the number of rooms would be the same - just really small rooms, especially the bedroom tend to be tiny for the houses we’ve seen. They are also in fairly diabolical states, places which haven’t had anything done for decades or just interiors all falling apart. We’re very handy and love doing a place up but I don’t know how much we can afford to do if we throw everything we have at securing the house.

I know in my heart it’s the right thing to do to move as we do want to be in a house and some of the negatives here are now outweighing the positives - guess I’m just trying to make sense of this situation of moving somewhere that in some ways feels a “step back”. Our flat at the moment was our first flat and maybe as we’ve poured our heart and soul into it it seems tough to leave. Maybe I’m a little scared of starting again and we have no time anymore as we have kids.

What trade offs have you made to move to a house, what was your thinking with it all, did you manage to do a “derelict” property up (unfortunately I don’t mean s project where you have 1/2 budget of what you paid for your house left to renovate and maybe even live somewhere else meanwhile - more of the “on the go” type of tinkering a house up!) and what were some quick wins to make the place feel your own? Has anyone moved that little bit further and commutes to school in town daily - how’s that for you?

thanks!

I’d hate not to have parking but think gardens are over-rated. My first home was a flat, 2 bed, 2 bath, lots of friends visited and were surprised at the space. One couple moved not long after exclaiming my flat was bigger than their house! Location is important but with a family, space even more so. However there’s a thread currently about the joys of a short commute and that’s absolutely true too with a family.

Thanks so much, we’re only just a family of four so only learning how we use space etc. In my head I’m planning to become a minimalist and collect no clutter - all kids toys out of the house and won’t be kept for anyone etc!

would you be able to share the short commute thread?

Why not stay in the flat? Parking the car is not worth moving for.

Is there not a compromise position, so slightly further out and a slightly larger/better quality house?

Theres also a difference between re-decorating and doing substantial improvements. You won’t be able to do re-wiring yourselves, nor plumbing or plastering if it needs it. So that’s all
down to budget and getting trades in.

We moved, not from a flat, but from a small semi detached to a large detached house with garden and drive. But the house had not been maintained well, and we knew we’d need to do a lot. With two young children and us both working we haven’t made anywhere near the progress we thought we might. And we also uncovered endless bodges the previous peiple had done, pretty much every time we started a piece of work. The garden was amazing during lockdown, and for the summer, and I could not go back to not having a drive. But maybe we should have compromised a bit on location or property size in order to have less to do on the house itself.

I moved from a massive flat to a small house that needed fully renovating. It was fine for us but it's a pita doing work on a small house whilst you live in it.

But in your situation with small kids, I'd probably stay put. It's not worth the effort and having to compromise on toys and stuff sounds miserable.

How old are the kids? I’m wondering how long you’ll need access to that school for. Like a PP I think gardens are overrated (not popular, I know), and you must have a solution now for the car even if it’s not perfect.

But space for small kids is so, so important. Space for their stuff (and yours), but more crucially space for you to spread out to play, or just have separation from each other when you need it.

I’d be tempted to wait a few years then move somewhere further out with everything you want.

Keep the flat everytime. The car is sortable.

Dont pay moving costs for less space!
Unless the house gives eg attic space or large storage shed/garden room

I don't think I have ever seen a flat bigger than even the smallest house I know... maybe a flat on par with the small bungalow for the elderly round here but not on par with a family house (which must be at least 2 bed right).

I struggling to image just how huge this flat is that its equal to the upstairs and downstairs of even a small house or how tiny this house will be, the only way I could think is if its one of those itsy bitsy micro 1 bed cottages that are basically 1 up, 1 down but those aren't 'family' suitable homes.

I'm not a 'flat' fan, would never actively move back to one but at the same time our number one priority in a house was a good size (we don't have a garden as it wasn't a top priority). So I wouldn't choose either of your options.

We bought a doer up and stayed in rented for 3 months while we did the work (rewire, new ceilings, new floors, new roofs, new kitchen, new bathroom, new render etc...), spent £21k but also got a good BIG house for a very good price. I think living in a property during a reno would be much harder though, being a first time buyer in rented helped.

Are you actively looking at houses? keep your eyes open and see what come up. Our house had been heavily extended sometime over 35 years ago (back when extending was cheaper) basically doubling the size so much bigger than others round here. It had not been updated at all since extending. The cost to extend it like that now would be more than the actual cost of the house yet as a 'doer up' it wasn't any more expensive than neighboring houses that where original 'small' size. It took a long time watching rightmove and waiting to find what we needed but we did get something that ticked all our boxes.

Is the flat leasehold? Is the house freehold?

I would always prefer freehold.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5462246-to-say-that-this-is-one-of-the-best-ways-to-improve-worklife-balance?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=app_share

this was the work/life balance thread about short commutes being key

I grew up in a massive ground floor conversation flat. 4 double bedrooms and 2 large reception rooms. Many 4 bed new build houses are tiny in comparison. But flats mean lots of close neighbours to negotiate with and I prefer a house.

We lived in a 3 double bedroom/ double living room/ 2 bathroom ground floor flat for 15 years with kids - with a big garden and a drive! It was a similar sq ft to a 3
bed house - in fact much bigger than most new build 3 beds. Not all flats are poky.

Actually, just checked and apparently the average sq footage of a 3 bed house in England is 800 - 1000 sq ft. Our 3 bed flat was 1200 sq ft.

Why on earth would you do that to yourself?

How old are your chikdren? Its just bedrooms become really important in the teen years. Lots of children spend a lot of time in them. They might get interested in clothes and want wardrobe space, need a desk etc. They also are less likely to play in a garden beyond 11.

We moved from a big terrace to a smaller detached house. We moved for parking, location, less neighbours and garden. I still miss the bigger bedrooms a lot. It was also a project and I regret putting my children through that. It cost so much money and time. Although I think our house is more valuable now so maybe it will pay off when we retire. The area is better.

I actually love my garden but it is only used 6 months a year.

I wouldn’t move to something smaller with 2 kids.Stay where you are and rethink your plans. Millions of children live in flats with no access to a garden.

Family member had an enormous 1 bedroom flat with tons of storage. It was bigger than lots of modern new build houses.

I think one floor living works so well with families and small children ie flats and bungalows, you can keep all the toys nearby in their bedrooms and not clutter up your living room The bedrooms can also become playrooms.

I have a massive 2 bed flat

it’s bigger square footage than lots of small terrace houses
huge bedrooms and loads of storage

Realistically, you spend more time inside your house than you do in a garden. Gardens ate a nice to have, but indoor space is more important.

For space and location we’ve gone with a house that previously suffered movement (allegedly- the more we look into it we think it’s just built wonky)
the layout isn’t ideal either, upside down with garden two flooors down from kitchen.

tbh it takes a lot to make it work and some days I feel a bit frustrated when I see gorgeous doors opening from kitchens to gardens! But we’re slowly transforming and adapting it and it’s getting there

but we also have a very flexible approach - one room has been three different things so far!

Has the house got separate dining rooms or living rooms because thats what I would consider as important

You have to think realistically about how much the things you don’t have actually matter on a day to day basis as opposed to how much the things you would be giving up would matter on a day to day basis if you moved.

1. You currently have plenty of space for all of you. If you moved, you would have smaller rooms. That means less storage space for your stuff and less room for the kids to play and for you and your husband to socialise. How would that impact how you live?
2. You currently don’t have direct access to your garden. How much does that actually impact how you use it? Do you use the garden every day or just in the summer? How much of an inconvenience is it to not be able to walk out of your back door into the garden? Is the inconvenience so disruptive that it’s worth moving for?
3. You currently don’t have a drive. How do you charge your car currently? What difference would it make if you could charge it on your own drive? Is that difference worth moving for?
4. You currently have an easy commute to school. How disruptive would it be to your lives to have to get public transport to school in the morning? How much would that added journey time impact you all and would it be worth the hassle if you moved?

The most important things to consider when moving are everyday realities v occasional ideals.

I know lots of people who have moved to have more space for dinner parties that they never host, or gardens that they use for six weeks a year and then the rest of the time complain about having to maintain.

You talk about wanting a drive to charge the car and direct access to a garden and I wonder whether these are really more important than a flat where you have enough space to live and have an easy commute to school. Having a smaller living space and a stressful journey to school in the morning would impact your everyday life in ways that would probably outweigh the benefits of moving. Add onto that the need to do a load of renovations - it just sounds like a lot of effort for not a huge amount of actual benefit.

Could you not just wait another few years and save so that when the kids are in secondary you can afford somewhere bigger?

And when you move, it still doesn’t have to be a house for you to get what you want - in London, where I live, flat conversions of huge Victorian places are often bigger than terraced houses and frequently have their own gardens and driveways. They are much better value than houses when it comes to £ per m2.

I would stay put and try and save for a bigger house. There’s a lot more to consider when moving from a flat, DH and I loved our flat, stayed there for over 4 years, but it was cold in winter, hot in the summer, we also had good neighbours, ground rent and maintenance fees were minimal then. A garden is nice once DC are walking.

This. I have never lived in a flat but would not do this I would stay. If you want a green space what is the waiting list for an allotment or a NT membership?