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Property/DIY

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How do people do it

16 replies

SilverDoublet · 11/11/2025 22:52

How do people manage to move house, get the house done up/ renovated, all while both parents have jobs and look after children 🙈. I just can't seem to get anything done.

OP posts:
Lemoneyey · 11/11/2025 23:17

Did you buy doer upper?

itsthetea · 11/11/2025 23:20

Renovation pre kids makes it easier
or when kids are older

between 0 and 9 then don’t renovate

jammytoast2 · 11/11/2025 23:26

You don’t. Not very well anyway. And certainly not quickly. My house is an endless mess of clutter and unfinished projects, I barely have enough time to keep on top of the washing and cleaning never mind full DIY renovations. Maybe one day.

caringcarer · 11/11/2025 23:40

Watch a YouTube instructional video and do one small job at a time.

housethatbuiltme · 12/11/2025 00:16

Depends what the renovations are.

A full extension or back to brick etc... I have no idea how people live in it while that goes on, we stayed in rented through ours.

Small things like redecorating, new boiler, roof fixes, small electrical upgrades etc... is easy to live in through. For most of them you thing you would hire tradesmen anyway.

If your doing DIY 'referb' jobs then do them on the weekend, one person watches the kids while the other does the jobs or if your lucky and have family to watch the kids while you both do it. A lot of DIY jobs can be done by one or two people in a weekend.

SunnySideDeepDown · 12/11/2025 00:17

We’re doing it. Renovations before kids were a piece of piss in comparison. This time round, I’ve cried, been stressed, and definitely dropped the ball at times. But it’s still exciting and I’m glad we’re doing it.

rainingsnoring · 12/11/2025 06:49

I don't think many people buy renovation projects when the have small children if both parents also work full time.

Twiglets1 · 12/11/2025 07:12

Moving house isn’t that hard with children as long as you get the EA to do the viewings so the children can be out of the house at the time. A bit hard to keep the place tidy but you do your best & people buying family homes normally except a bit of clutter (not too much).

Doing big renovations with small children, no idea how people manage that or why they would put themselves through the pain & worry with unpredictable costs.

PersephoneParlormaid · 12/11/2025 07:12

Pay someone else to do it

Kitchenbattle · 12/11/2025 07:21

we bought a new build in August, immediately prior to moving in we had the bathrooms and kitchen fitted, the floors put in (except the carpets).
since moving we have had the whole house painted. Wardrobes built in. Furniture arrivals and the carpet is next week. etc etc. not a renovation but enough to do. Honestly…we paid for people to do most of it. 2 dc and we work full time. There’s no way we would attempted to paint the whole house ourselves.

JustAn0therUsername · 12/11/2025 07:50

We just do it.

At the moment DH is doing stud walls, plumbing, electrics so I pick up meals, washing, cleaning etc. When it’s decorating, tiling, flooring etc I step up and do that and he takes on the household bits.

I lower my standards around cleaning for the course of a project to “that’ll do”.

Essentially we just chip away at it. There are pictures of my building a kitchen with a toddler “helping” and young kids painting. I renovated some stonework with a baby asleep in a Moses, breaking regularly to check on her.

ResusciAnnie · 12/11/2025 07:55

itsthetea · 11/11/2025 23:20

Renovation pre kids makes it easier
or when kids are older

between 0 and 9 then don’t renovate

We did a huge build while living-in with a 1 year old and 2 older kids. It wasn’t as bad as I was expecting but we paid top dollar for a reliable, kind, friendly, competent builder, and went to an air BnB for 2 days (of a 9 month build!) - came back to sleep as preferred our own beds.
Basically OP we paid a premium for an easier ride.
It’s nearly 2 years since the build finished and we’re just getting some new carpets finally put in and need a new bathroom (as didn’t do that in build). It’s a process so to answer the question I think people do it via a mixture of patience, planning, and a lot of money. I’d love a cleaner for example, that would make life a lot easier.
When we moved we got packers - more money (but actually not that much more and it was worth it!).

LibertyLily · 12/11/2025 13:00

We're older now, but did three mainly DIY renovation projects starting when DS was six weeks old. He'd just turned eight when we moved into the third. I was running my own business (a shop for which I designed some stock myself) and OH was employed in the interior design industry.

The first (3 bed, 3 reception mid terrace Victorian) really just needed a new kitchen and redecoration throughout. The second (4 bed, 3 reception, 2 bath Victorian detached) needed a rewire and new heating system (professionals did these), new kitchen, two new bathrooms and redecoration.

The third (6 beds, 3 receptions, 3 bathrooms, detached Victorian) was considerably larger at 3500 sq ft and was configured as several flats when we bought it. Everything needed doing including removing partition and load-bearing walls, rebuilding the original staircase and gothic style conservatory, plus replastering where necessary. OH did the plastering etc and we removed walls ourselves (having obtained structural engineer calculations etc). Windows, heating, rewire done by the pros.

Looking back I honestly don't know how we did it whilst both working and with a young DS, but we'd come home, eat, get him to bed then start demolition/decorating. House 3 took around eight years to complete which, imo, most people wouldn't accept - I recall one friend asking if we were planning to move into a hotel while the work was done for us by a team of builders...oh, how I laughed!

We're still renovating (in our mid 50s, downsized several times) and majority is still DIY as we really enjoy it, although I don't work these days.

DS has his own house (and young family) now and is renovating it himself whilst they both work, having learned loads from us, I guess. DiL doesn't do any DIY. DS seems to get way more knackered than I remember us being - perhaps because he has to do it all himself or maybe they just don't make them like they used to, lol!

DavidJonson · 12/11/2025 17:39

Totally normal to feel that way moving and renovating are huge stressors! Most people manage by breaking it into small chunks, outsourcing where they can (cleaning, childcare, deliveries), and accepting “good enough” instead of perfect for a while. It’s chaos for everyone you’re doing fine.

wantam · 12/11/2025 17:45

I'm often amazed that some will buy a property and then need to gut it. Firstly I understand if it's the perfect location and size and the only one in the area, but if you have a choice, why would anyone not go for a house that just needs decorating or even just new curtains.

I know people like to put their own stamp on a home, that can be achieved with decor and furniture, but the stories I read about refurbs taking months and years bring tears to my eyes. I don't get it.

Maybe some love the challenge, maybe it's to flip, maybe there's no choice available. But if you do have a choice why do it? As for it being the only thing you can afford, surely the cost of refurb these days is astronomical.

Explain!!

JustAn0therUsername · 12/11/2025 18:50

I understand that thought. We went for ours because we could buy a house that will be our forever home at an affordable price. Garage, big garden, countryside, old stone build, detached, beautiful walks straight out in the village. If we wanted one that just needed curtains we would not have been able to afford it. This way we have our home, can make it our own, and have been able to save and improve our position along the way getting where we need to be piecemeal.

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