Finally Sale Agreed, but I feel so empty!

[Boobyslims]

Maybe it’s an expected “comedown” after an intense window, but I feel irritable, exhausted, I can’t really tell which bit of my bad mood came first.

i am splitting up with my partner and leaving with my two children (they are not his). This has been amicable enough, but unexpected too, I knew things weren’t great but I did not expect him to pull the plug.

i feel like I’ve gone through battle to go sale agreed. First it was the stress of so little housing actually on the market. I’ve stayed in an area that allows the kids to stay in the same school, live closer to friends. I wfh so that’s fine. The house has an office.

Then the battle to actually get it! Through various jigs and reels, I got it. I had other bidders lying in the long grass swooping in at the end, I had the classic two horse race bidding… twice… but I got it. I’m over my comfort level financially but - I’m still ok.

so why am I soooo so so so irritable since going sale agreed??? Shouldn’t I be lolling my way to the bank for the mortgage?

all things considered I’ve overpaid a bit, but got exactly the house I require and in the village I was after all along. Give me a reality slap/shake whatever, please! I feel so flat :(

Emotional exhaustion at a guess

you are making progress so hats enough

I think this is often the way the body works in so many situations. When you've been running on adrenaline, you feel a big drop when the adrenaline subsides.
But... if you're only just at the sale agreed stage, you've got so much more stress and adrenaline to come, so you'll feel normal again in no time!

@Tupsteryes, more stress incoming! 😂

I had been expecting a feeling of certainty or something. I don’t like making these huge decisions alone. Like, I thought I’d feel more cemented to the solution and some reassurance of my decision would come, but instead I just feel detached??!!

i suppose I’d be a hell of a lot more stressed if it fell through and I was continuing on here with my future uncertain.

I came back to give a wee update. I signed contracts yesterday and hopefully move within four weeks. The mood swings have continued but most of the “work” is done now. It’s the pressure of making all the decisions - answering endless questions about health, plans for the unexpected such as illness or death… it all makes you feel very mad, but right now I am seeing a set of new keys in my future…

job for today is to price up and book the removals & packing service and buy cardboard boxes online for the rooms I want to do myself (as this is a split I need to separate out stuff in some rooms)

don’t really know why I’m posting, I suppose for the first time in all this I feel excited and happy!!!!

Thanks for the update OP, you've done amazing juggling and sorting everything.

I hope you are now settling in to your new home and best wishes for your new chapter😊

Thank you!!! I’m two weeks in and I am over the moon!!! I absolutely love it. My stress levels are a thing of the past - I’m still waking up too early but not with the stomach churn of anxiety. My body is settling down. I just had a birthday and I was thinking how good everything is in my life, I’m lucky. Not like in a ‘trying to be positive’ way, it just feels that way for real now. All my decisions gave me this feeling back now. I hadn’t registered the shit show that has been the last ten years.

Thanks again :)

I love this update!

It’s a lot. I cried when I completed on my first flat and after I picked up the keys. I loved it - but the weight of doing it on your own weighs heavy I think. It sounds like you’ve got a lovely place and you’ll be find once the stress response comes off. Not just the property but your divorce. Don’t be so hard on yourself xx

So happy for you that you have come through all this. You now have a home that’s yours that you love. Be kind to yourself. All the very best for future. Thanks for updating us.