Anyone else have to sell a house due to divorce?

[Hollowoman]

Hey. Such a beautiful day and I'm all alone, worrying about housing. My lovely neighbours all have their friends and familes round for al fresco dinners and though I feel glad to hear their chatter across the fences, the smell of BBQ's wafting across, I also feel so isolated and stressed because I have no family or friends - just a very angry ex husband who has written to say the house must be sold (I agree to this) because I am in arrears on the mortgage and his name is on it. I am certain he will want hald the proceeds of sale, even though he has not paid a penny in to the property since I left him over 11 years ago. It all feels so scary. Has anyone else been in this position and how did you manage the sale?

I've done it.
If his name is on the mortgage then he should be paying half of it. Doesn't matter that he's not living there. Unless that was the agreement between you.
Yes, he is still entitled to half the equity.
You should probably seek legal advice. You can get 1/2 free in the UK.

What is the financial settlement?

The bottom line though is that the mortgage is in arrears so even if your ex wasnt on it you would still be in trouble.

If he left 11 years ago why didn’t you divorce then? Not judging at all just curious. If you’re in arrears, best to sell the house and be prepared to give him half, although I would argue in the courts that you’ve been separated for so long that you deserve a higher % of the equity. Do you have children and if so how old?

They could be divorced with a financial settlement BUT she cant get her ex's name off the mortgage

Post on the the Divorce/ Separation Board.

We divorced in 2012 and drew up an agreement to keep both our names on the house as I was on unpaid maternity leave and would not have been given a mortgage by myself. He never paid a penny toward the house or the children as he had the children half the week and bought his own house which has nothing to do with me, I've never even set foot inside it.

Yes @JohnofWessex, that's basically it.

Since posting here, I have emailed a family law firm and asked if I can speak to them on Monday. I'll let you all know what they say, in case anyone else finds themself in similar trouble.

Good luck OP

The issue though is why is the mortgage in arrears, by how much and can you recover the situation?

There is another thread on this that I cant find at the moment.

The OP's ex is still in residence until the house is sold and he has to pay the mortgage by Court Order but hasnt.

The advice is that he is in contempt of court and could go to jail.

I dont know what your Court Order says but clearly this could be very serious for you. Clearly you need to look at the order and consider what might happen if your ex gets his act together.

AH! Its a Grauniad article

https://www.theguardian.com/money/2025/apr/08/our-divorce-ruling-may-have-enabled-my-ex-husband-to-trash-my-credit-score#comment-171209008

It confirmed that even if you were to go back to the courts, you are still contractually liable for the joint debt to the mortgage lender. It ­suggested that, contrary to your lawyers’ advice, your ex-husband’s failure to follow a court order is potentially in contempt of court and that a judge may issue enforcement penalties against him or amend the original decision. You should perhaps consult a new lawyer about this.

That’s a very sad situation…
However my experience with that sort of matter is that courts are useless.
You will be better figuring out if you can recover from the situation and find an agreement with the bank. If the decision is to sell the house, I would suggest you look for mediation to reduce his share rather than applying to the court.
(My current partner is in this limbo for almost 4 years now… and going to an expensive financial hearing in a couple of months)