Moving house in your 60‘s kids grown up. What did you do?

[mumma24]

Did you upsize and renovate?
downsize to a bungalow?
move to the seaside or country?
move closer to family and grandchildren?
move to free up money for retirement?
sell your house and go travelling?
would love to know your story and any tips and advice along the way.

All these folk upsizing and downsizing and building extensions and buying boats...
DH and I live in a 2 bed( plus boxroom) upstairs flat. Selling it won't raise enough to buy a bungalow. We don't want another mortgage as need to retire as soon as financially possible due to health issues.
Guess we go on the council list and hope we get something before dh can no longer manage the stairs.

I absolutely agree about de-cluttering. It makes the photos for Rightmove look so much more appealing. I would also say paying for the removal company to do your packing is so very worth it. They know exactly how to pack properly and any cherished items are protected and arrive in their destination in one piece. So much less stress than trying to do it yourself. As the owner of a very extensive wardrobe of clothes, their cardboard wardrobe systems are great too lol!

We moved in our mid 60s two years agofrom a five bed detached house close to London to a three bed town house with courtyard garden in the middle of a medium sized city. Best thing we ever did! Doctors, cafe /restaurants and pub within five minute walk, and two flights of stairs to keep fit. Wish we’d done it earlier. We have family both close by now and abroad. On our ground floor we have a dining room which could be converted to a bedroom if needed, and by the stairs the power supply to a stair lift left by the previous owner.

We are mid 60s and have a large detached house. We will not move because once moving expenses and stamp duty are paid, over a 20 year period the savings are marginal.

We would prefer to keep the house in the family and pass it to one of the DC in 10 years or so when we would be prepared to downsize to a flat.

For those who say they need homes with room for grown up children to stay, have you run the costs of sending them to a Premier Inn type hotel three/four times a year.

Seriously tempted to do this .

We are London based and decided to stay and upgrade out small property and make it what we wanted, we are doing a massive garden project instead of converting the loft.
My other half met someone through work who had a retired husband and a massive family home in the Cotswolds, they rented that out and now rent themselves right next to London Bridge with a terrace and river views. I loved that idea.
I've always wanted to retire to a little village- called Soho WC1. Other half wants to stay where there is outside space and her fox family.

That sounds perfect - it's so lovely when your move works out and you're happy. There are some things you can't factor in, like neighbours (I speak as someone who had neighbour 'trouble' at our last house, so much so we had to declare it on our conveyancing forms as we had to get solicitors involved). We feel the same as you, absolutely love it and luckily have wonderful neighbours on both sides! (Pheww!!!)

Like yourself, I think part of a happy move is going somewhere where there's plenty to do - pubs, libraries, cinemas, theatres, cafes, restaurants, shops etc. all within easy reach.

DM downsized to a 2 bed ground floor flat by the sea. Nice walks, close to shops and amenities, on a bus route to the big town and hospital.
And loads of the other apartments are holiday lets, so we can stay close by (at a discount, especially in winter, as she knows everyone!)

8 years ago I moved 9 miles from a town with limited facilities to the biggest town not city with hospitals, great transport links and a thriving arts and theatre scene. My DD and grandson are still on the first town so not far away and there's a direct bus route. I am relatively fit and healthy but wanted to be near hospitals and be in a walkable place as I don't have a car. I am in a 2 bed Victorian terrace with small garden just off a very cosmopolitan road with an amazing array of shops and eateries. Very very happy as I approach 70.

Typo

I've been having this discussion for several years with him. He is so stubborn and I've told him he's being selfish and short sighted. I've seen lovely 3 bedroom houses and bungalows with smaller and low maintenance gardens which would be ideal, but he always says garden too small because he enjoys gardening or only tiny garage or not enough room for DD, Sil and dgc to come and stay. I've pointed out we could pay to put them up in a local Premier Inn about half a mile away for sleeping. Also I've pointed out to him ATM we are both fit and well enough to do a big move in 10 years time, which he thinks is when we might make a move we might struggle more physically and it's not fair to expect DC to have to come to help us sort it all out. I think he's just kicking the can down the road and it infuriates me. If I complain about lots of additional cleaning, which I have done, he just says ask the cleaner to do a couple more hours each week.

My parents moved from a suburban 4-bed detached to a significantly larger 4-bed converted barn in the countryside.
Dad passed about 7-8 years later and mum is still currently rattling around in his huge house on her own. She seems happy enough and still manages it well at very-nearly 70yo, but I can't see it being her forever home.

Don't know what happened to my previous post, cursor was jumping around all over the place so had to delete.🤔

We moved 3yrs ago before taking early retirement (57).
After living in villages, we decided we needed to be closer to amenities so settled on the outskirts of the small market town where OH was born (although no family here any more).
Small hospital for my (frequent) tests & scans. Shops, vets, mainline train station etc so everything we need.
Bought a bigger house so we can have dedicated guest rooms, study, hobbies etc. House will take adaptation in the future (lift, wet room etc).
Garden is a reasonable size which is perfectly acceptable as we saw how parents struggled with their huge garden in later life.
OH has said that if I go first, he would possibly consider moving into a flat of some kind, I on the other hand will just stop here and look into having a live-in carer.

My PIL were 200 miles away from just after we got married (20yrs) and moved back, close to my SIL and about 30 miles from us, 4 years ago to a 2 bed bungalow in a quiet, rural village, intending that to be their forever home. Since then, sadly, their relationship with SIL has irretrievably broken down and they've realised how cut off they are in their village, the bus service is dismal and there's not even a doctors surgery. They're now looking to move again (they're early 70's now and in reasonable health), closer to us and back where they originally lived before moving 200 miles away, probably another 2 bed bungalow.

I'm beyond relieved they're being sensible, DH and I had been worried for some time prior to them moving the last time that we would eventually have to navigate their care long distance and it would still be a challenge for us where they are currently (it's still almost an hour away) so having them 10 minutes away (the plan for this next move) will make everything so much easier.

They're amazing parents (and PIL) and DH and I are in complete agreement that we want to do everything we can to help them as they get older so I'm glad we're all on the same page and they're being proactive about making things as easy as possible for all concerned. They've even sorted POA etc already even though they're both currently well, everything is in place for if/when it's needed. I'm estranged from my family but know they would have been the exact opposite, they would have made everything as hard as possible so PIL's approach is like a breath of fresh air to me!

Your DH sounds much more reasonable on this issue than mine is. He's a good man and he's reasonably in every other area but he seems fixated on loosing his home and workshop. My DS has offered to help him sort out and declutter the workshop so it could move into a smaller area in a new house. I'm going to declutter my stuff but generally most of the unwanted or unneeded items are his. I'm happy to stay in the same area or I'd move somewhere new if he would only agree to downsize. It was a fantastic house to bring up children in but they are grown and gone now and only DH and 2 foster DC remain.

Downsized from a house with loads of stairs, no disabled access and a 200 foot garden to a smaller house with a courtyard garden near my DS and DIL.
Thank God! A year later my hip went and I've been unable to walk for a year as there was a complication with surgery.
If I'd been living in my old house on my own I would have been completely housebound and isolated. I was fit and well when I moved with plans to spend less time gardening and more time socialising, I never expected to end up like this at 63.

We moved earlier than we expected to (me early 50s, dh mid) purely because the house came on the market and it was a no brainer. Built as a bungalow with dormer extensions, but it’ has the same number of rooms but is actually bigger in square footage than our previous house (not deliberate), it was all about the location, which is only a mile away from the previous house.
I grew up with a parent with a physical disability, and it was always on my radar that he and mum were able to live downstairs due to the house being built as a bungalow. Dh’s legs are riddled with arthritis and my knees aren’t far behind, so we wanted a bedroom and bathroom downstairs.
We still have 1 at home, and we’re going to offer our eldest to move in with her partner so they can save. We couldn’t have done this in the old house due to everything being smaller.
it’s probably our last move

My in-laws downsized initially from 7 bed victorian house to a 4 bed house but after the youngest kids moved out, they then downsized to a 2 bed flat overlooking the sea.

I'm in the process of helping my parents downsize from 3 bed victorian house to a 2 bed 1930's bungalow but they're moving from East London to the south West to be close to us. I've encouraged them to do this now, as my mum does have some mobility issues but both parents are fundamentally in good health. It's best to do it now whilst they have a choice rather than doing the move when it's pretty much forced upon them due to failing ill health.

DPs moved in their early-mid 60s to a house which was slightly smaller inside, but with the same number of bedrooms (4, one set up as office/study), not counting the annexe they had had for my DGM, and with a significantly smaller garden bc they wanted less work. They also moved from a more remote location to one in a small market town, where they had most of what they needed in walking distance.

After another 15ish years they moved to a smaller flat (2 beds and a mezzanine study area) in a retirement complex in the same nice little town, with a lift. This should be their last place unless they need significant care.

@LaurieFairyCakethis is also my plan - I’m z6 south at the moment with great public transport links but would love to maybe move nearer when I retire. Ideally I’d like to be near a river so I could have nice walks along it.

@caringcarer This does sound challenging. Your husband is clearly frightened to move and lose the security of his present house, garden and workshop.

Will you be able to accept not moving, or do you think it will eventually cause problems in your marriage?

I forgot to also add that although my parents will be downsizing to a 2 bed bungalow, my mum already has plans to knock down the conservatory and build a rear end extension (under permitted regs) to build a 3rd bedroom/living room and 2nd bathroom so it'll probably be as big their original home they're moving from.

@mumma24 , we’d been looking very hard to move for a good ten years but weren’t prepared to take too much compromise as it was to be our retirement property. We were extremely fortunate to find a virtually derelict bungalow which had planning consent pending and was substantially granted. So we’ve built a beautiful modern home on the towpath overlooking the Thames with lovely balconies. We have a front ‘river’ garden where most of the flowers are and a big back garden which is mostly paved with big flower beds of tropical and Mediterranean plants. The jacuzzi is in the back garden. The house has 5 double bedrooms all with bathrooms and our family comes to stay often. We can walk 5 minutes along the towpath to our town which has shops, cafes, restaurants, cinema, library etc and it’s a 10 minute walk to our train station which is a particularly good one. We’re not reliant on our cars if ever we can’t drive and the house has a downstairs bedroom with en-suite for when we get old and a study which would be great for a carer if required although we built a gym on the third floor so we can keep as fit as possible. We moved in three years ago when I was 58. We were extremely lucky. 😊

Downsized, then moved because public transport was decimated and facilities were few and far between. We upsized to a cheaper area near the sea, with good public transport and shops and facilities in walking distance. The grandchildren stayed often, but they’re grown now and busy with their own stuff. We’ve recently downsized again to a better village with reasonable public transport to nearby towns, a limited range of shops, but enough to get by and near larger shopping areas.

We’re in our early sixties and moved last year to a 4 bedroomed house in DH’s childhood town. Children have bought properties in the neighbouring town, a short bus ride away. We have a ten minute walk into town with shops, restaurants, library and good doctors surgery. We are a short bus ride away from a good hospital with cardiac care and a stroke unit.
The house has level access to the front door, a room downstairs which could be converted but the stairs could easily accommodate a stair lift. The garden is a reasonable size which was important as we have two largish dogs.
it’s an old house but really well insulated and much cheaper to heat than one of our previous much more modern houses which we rented.

We’ve just paid off the mortgage and are deliriously happy.