Moving house in your 60‘s kids grown up. What did you do?

[mumma24]

Did you upsize and renovate?
downsize to a bungalow?
move to the seaside or country?
move closer to family and grandchildren?
move to free up money for retirement?
sell your house and go travelling?
would love to know your story and any tips and advice along the way.

Just said this on another thread. Moved to London for walkable amenities and a hospital close by. Also wanted to actually take up hobbies instead of just gardening (which I’d been doing for 30 years by then). I don’t miss the garden at all, have some pots on the terrace, instead I’m out at the theatre every week and have something different hobby wise every day. Never been more fulfilled in my life 😊

My Grandmother: downsized to a dormer bungalow in the centre of town with the second bedroom and a full bathroom downstairs,which she moved into about 20 years after moving.

My parents: downsized into a bungalow with decent bus links.

Both stayed in the area they had spent their adulthood.

This is my dilemma too. Grandchildren hundreds of miles away, cranky unpleasant mother near where I live, another child living a long way away. We want to move to somewhere that has enough space for when they visit as they can’t put us up, but not so big that it’s costing a lot to run and maintain. Somewhere with lots to do and good amenities but not too built up . I prefer a semi rural environment but need good transport links and a vibrant active community with low crime. Tearing my hair out ! It’s so hard to know what to do.
Im already thinking about possible future mobility issues, access to hospitals etc, and want somewhere that will work for the rest of my life.

My parents downsized to a 3 bed semi. They were still working in their 60s, moved to be closer to me and my siblings, and couldn’t afford a bungalow.

They're now in their 70s and are planning the next move to be to a care home or retirement flat situation as and when they need it.

@LaurieFairyCake sounds wonderful. I’m a keen gardener. Interesting to hear you don’t miss the garden at all. We‘re considering a small one or courtyard garden now

I’m not in your situation yet, but hopefully you’ve got 20-40 years ahead and no crystal ball on your health, mobility etc. my in-laws have declared the home they are in now as ‘final’ but as they get less active or if one of them ends up there alone it will be too big and we don’t live that close… then we might want to talk options, but they’ve already dug their heels in.

@MarchHare339 Sounds like we want the same things. Vibrant active community is so important

My parents downsized to a 2-bed, then a few years later moved to a 4-bed down the road in order to have more space for family visits.

This is our current plan (we are now mid 30s). Currently have 5 acre of gardens and to be honest we work so hard so much is outsourced and we are always working in various cities anyway. When the kids leave it’ll be London or perhaps a smaller city. My boss has just moved from Winchester to London and is loving it.

My in laws upsized to a 6 bed and are middle of nowhere and I think they are mad! They do love gardening and their poly tunnel though. I also love being in the garden but I’d want a rich social life within walking distance.

The other thing is money. If we move we are going to have to use savings to buy somewhere in a more expensive area. Should we be keeping that to live our best life? Our best life doesn’t involve being so far from our children and grandchildren. So many people say don’t buy a buy a house just for people to stay, but it’s important to be able to have your children and grandchildren to stay , especially if they have little space themselves. We tend to always have Xmas at our house for example. They don’t have the space to host or money to stay locally.

We moved from the south to the north, initially we decided to downsize from a 4 bed semi with a really good size garden, however the house we bought although it’s a 3 bed with space to create a 4th bedroom and it’s detached, it’s actually a larger house than the one we left in the south. We have a smaller garden, which we wanted and we’re in a very small town having moved from quite a large one.

We are nearer our GC, which was the main motivation to move but we’d long wanted to move and retire to the county we now live in.

We’re further away from our parents than we were but we are able to visit them regularly as we’ve retired so have time on our hands.

I’m not sure this is our final home as we may have to consider mobility etc as we get older but I hope we’re in our current house for at least five more years.

This will be dh and I in 5 years time. Our plan is to move to a 3 bed bungalow. We will stay in our town as it has good facilities, and enough going on to keep us busy.

My mum moved from a 6 bed detached with quite a big garden which was our family home to a 3 bed bungalow (third bedroom is an office and very small). Much smaller garden and we gutted it before she moved in, made in step free access and wide doorways. She intends to stay there for as long possible - she's only early 60s but didn't see the point in staying in a massive family house by herself that was costing a lot to heat etc and starting to need expensive roof work. She wants to be independent for as long as possible so moved a little closer into town so she can walk everywhere if needed. She's loving it and has made lots of new friends and hobbies.

My parents stayed in their existing home and added an extension downstairs to make the space more flexible - an additional room (currently a hobby room but scope for becoming a future bedroom) and an accessible wet room. They also had the stairs redone so there is space for a stair lift to be added, if needed. Mobility issues already on the way! They decided they have lived in that house so long they know it so well that would be the best option when mobility issues for one and dementia sets in proper for the other. They know all it's creeks and quirks and won't need to 'learn' a new home. They live in a vibrant community already with good public transport links, a bus ride from a theatre e.g., and use their bus passes daily.

You are living my retirement dream 🥰

My parents upsized on retirement from 4 bed in the south to 8 bed in the north with lots of space to host at Christmas and summer holidays. And they loved hosting both family and friends for 15 years there. Then downsized back to 4 bed in the same town with good shops and local friends.

Moved at 50, kids left home. We live in a town with all day to day amenities and close to bus stop to get to the nearest city centre, hopefully new railway (approved) coming before I quit work too. Beach at the end of my road.

the house does have stairs but it’s modern so they have wide doors and the staircase is wide enough for a stair lift just in case, have large walk in shower in my en suite too, this is our forever home so unless one of us becomes completely incapacitated we should be good. You have to think about these things.

i chose convenience and location over a big garden, not a fan here but if I want to grow veg there’s allotments available locally

Our house does have a room downstairs big enough to make into a decent sized bedroom and our downstairs loo is big enough to add a shower should one of us not be able to manage the stairs. However we are are the top of a hill so if both of us become unable to drive, we’d have to think about how we’d access the local amenities which are all at the bottom of the hill.

Our little town doesn’t have a train station so that might be a consideration also but hopefully this is all a very long way off.

I’m currently listening to the woes of 3 colleagues whose parents are living in totally unsuitable housing, hundreds of miles away, and are now in their late 70’s and unwilling/able to downsize. One is living downstairs as she can’t make the stairs. Another lives in a village with no doctor etc. Makes me think mid-60’s is the time to get organized.

mumma24

I really, really don’t miss it at all. And I had a 100 foot by 70 foot garden AND a massive flower allotment. Not missed it for one minute in the 8 years I’ve lived in London.

We are mid fifties and just about to downsize. We love our area. We are buying a small cottage, and a sailing boat (my dream) and will buy a tiny place overseas - big enough for our dc to visit and stay but small enough to look after ourselves with a communal garden. We intend to enjoy village life, hobbies and dreams. Learning new skills and staying fit!

We did everything on your list, except the last two!
We bought a bungalow, which absolutely required renovating, the garden needed total clearance, redesigning and replanting.
We did a small extension, under permitted development, but under the councils approval for tweaks and regulations, and a bit of layout change. This has meant that it is a few hundred sq foot larger than our old family home; but where it is needed, to ensure the next 2 generations of our family can fit into the communal kitchen comfortably.
We have moved close enough to one set of grandchildren to help out and watch them grow.
We now live near the sea but not on it, and in a leafy village, on the edge of the countryside.
Has it been worth it, yes in a hundred non-financial terms.

At the moment if we had to sell, (not planning on, but we all know how unpredictable life is) we would not even break even, and living in a place with ongoing work for over 4 years was 😱💩…

However, is now done and a bit like childbirth you can start enjoying life and forget how ghastly it all was 🤣🤨😜

We too hated renovating years ago!

That’s our dream.

we moved early 50s from a terrace with a back yard to a bigger house with a garden. It’s great, but it’s ludicrously big for the 2 of us, and expensive to heat.

we are likely to downsize when we retire.

I would love to be able to do this when I retire but think London would be way out of our price range. Are there other cities with lots going on but a bit more affordable?

At the moment we live in cheap coastal very small town in the south. DC all teens and DM local and mid 70s. I love where we live but fancy something different when i don't have to work FT any more. I'm imagining moving in 10-15 years when we retire but I like to have plans!