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Brought a Reno and now I’m overwhelmed

30 replies

Muddledandmiddle · 03/02/2025 16:24

I don’t know where to start. I feel overwhelmed and almost panicked. With our last I had a clear vision right off the bat…. This time I just feel stumped. I’ve got health issues that have come on suddenly and the process of buying the house itself was so stressful that now we are here I just feel too tired.

and my god… the rise in costs? I was very stupidly, not prepared. I can’t get over how much things have risen post Covid.

someone tell me how to pull myself together.

OP posts:
Theresabatinmykitchen · 03/02/2025 16:29

Step by step, plan the essentials first, make sure the structure itself is sound then the heating and electrics, once they are sorted then you can start planning the individual rooms, just concentrate on getting the basics in place first and yes the costs are insane, what used to be a 100k to renovate an average size house now could easily be 200k, puts me off moving now as most houses seem to need a huge amount spending on them and they are not priced accordingly anymore.

SpringBunnyHopHop · 03/02/2025 16:32

What needs done? Is it liveable while you take time to decide?

Nic834 · 04/02/2025 07:08

I would get one room (probably your bedroom) to a comfortable standard to live in. I don’t mean have it done perfectly and exactly how you want to keep it for the next 10 years, but nice enough to live in. Unpack the room and set it up so that it’s a nice sanctuary away from the rest of the house.

I would then make sure you can do the basics in the bathroom and kitchen I.e. clean space to store food, wash, cook etc.

After that I’d leave everything for a bit and relax.

You will then have some space to think about what to do first when you’re ready.

Cattreesea · 04/02/2025 08:04

Get the basics done first:

  • Make sure the heating and plumbing all work
  • Get the electrics checked (if the previous owners did not provide you with a certificate) to make sure it is all safe
  • Keep an eye on roof and gutters for any leaks
  • Give the house a good clean.

Beyond that take time to unpack: the place will look better with your things in.

I painted all the walls and removed all the carpet myself, painted the fences and the shed...basically make a list of what you can do yourself and what you will need to hire people to do.

Ask for recommendations about local tradespeople.

Take your time! It took about a year for my house and garden to look decent and there is still a lot to do!

This is a good example of the highs and lows of buying something that needs tlc:
https://greenmermaidcottage.blogspot.com/2024/09/from-black-to-green-how-facing-toughest.html

From Black to Green: how facing the toughest challenge of my life led to a more sustainable lifestyle

In August 2023 I finally managed to move out of London and realise my dream of buying my first house on my own, by the sea. But within the f...

https://greenmermaidcottage.blogspot.com/2024/09/from-black-to-green-how-facing-toughest.html

LaPalmaLlama · 04/02/2025 13:03

We are now 5 months in (living in property- not back to brick but major structural and cosmetic upgrades needed) so here's what I've learned so far -

Upfront, decide what you're trying to achieve and what your resale horizon is. Are you primarily focused on resale value and on addressing things that might have put other buyers off and reduced the price (bedrooms through other bedrooms, tiny kitchen, not enough bathrooms, crappy roof etc.) or are you "this is my forever home and I just want what I want"? Personally I'm doing a bit of both, but our time horizon is 20 years so I can have whatever bathroom I like as in 20 years it'll probably be going in a skip anyway but if I was aiming to sell in 5 I'd probably approach it differently and go for something with broad appeal. I'm also fixing a few weird layout quirks and improving the insulation from a number of angles.

Agree with pp to focus on the structural first - roof, windows, heating and water, drainage, electrics, and suspicious damp patches. Do not do any cosmetic work until the structural things have been fixed because there's a risk you end up undoing them and wasting money or having suboptimal structural solutions to avoid undoing the cosmetic work (i.e don't want to take up a new floor to lay pipes). Also, make peace with the fact that it may have to get worse for a bit before it gets better- we currently have bare render on the walls in big patches and that's gonna stay like that for a while because other stuff needs to happen before the house gets painted. My bedroom is likely to be institutional green until at least 2027.

On things like water and plumbing, try to work end to end, so is the mains pipe ok? If no, then replace before you start on the water tank etc. If you're replacing a boiler or tank, do it before you do the bathrooms (this isn't essential but it's easier as the tradesperson knows what they're working with).

Get trades to be super clear about what is "OMG- that needs fixing or you might die" and what is "in an ideal world x would be like this". Then you can prioritise. It doesn't need to meet building standards if it was done years ago but obviously there are reasons for those standards being implemented (like no plug sockets in skirting) so you have to decide how much you care based on cost and risk appetite and budget.

Have a spreadsheet or dedicated planner and break everything down into "next step required" and then just grind through them. It makes things less daunting if the next thing is "call plumber to get quote" or "go to Howdens" rather than "fully refurbish 3 bathrooms/ the whole kitchen".

HTH. Good luck.

Muddledandmiddle · 04/02/2025 13:41

Thanks all. I’ve been waiting to wake up and suddenly feel inspired but it’s not happening, I know a lot of that mindset is circumstantial but it’s displacing as someone who likes to fell in control and with clarity all the time. I love a plan!

to answer some questions (sorry if I miss any) and give general context. House is 1960s and more or less original minus some very basic updates we think likely late 80s. It is liveable, yes- if anything we are actually all very much enjoying it as it is. It all needs doing- structurally it’s sound, and nothing is dodgy per se, certainly not bodge job type dodgy- just very old and so slightly on the blink but mostly working.

i have so far established that we at a min-

  • rip out boiler and water tank, replace all the piping and radiators throughout.
  • garage roof needs replacing and some joists need fixing.
  • we don’t need a full rewire but some updating, plus a lot of additional lighting and PowerPoints.
  • some repointing and facia work

all the windows are 15 years old so they are going to need doing too. Roof is fine- I think we’ll need it in next ten. Loft needs boarding and insulating.

thereafter we need two bathrooms and the kitchen doing. This is where I’m getting unstuck. We need to take down walls and remodel to do these, then recoup that space via converting the garage. But I can’t settle on a layout, which means I can’t commit to starting anything without risking wasting funds when if I realise it’s not what I want after all, as it all needs plumbing and electrical etc.

one option means losing garage, but gaining large master bath and a separate utility room and making the kitchen much bigger. Remaining a 4 bed as it is now.

the second option still looses the garage, having a smaller master bath, smaller utility, gaining a bedroom, making it a 5 bed.

everything else is largely cosmetic redecorating then- skimming, flooring, etc etc etc

in terms of longevity and value. We paid somewhat fairly for it, I feel. (Listed at 480, dropped to 435 due to failing health of sellers, we paid 425)
I believe that we will make the money back we spend. This said, I think this is a longer term home. 10-20 years, but potential ‘forever’.

thank you for any thoughts.

OP posts:
Gekko21 · 04/02/2025 13:56

Re the windows, are you assuming they need replacing purely because of their age? 15 years doesn't sound old for windows. Unless they are drafty, letting in water, rotting etc. I think you could leave those another decade. If any have blown, could you just get them fixed?

Other than that, I agree that layout is most important. You need to know where you are going with it. You need to note down your key use cases first - what's the problem statement (what's not working for you right now?) and then what needs do you need to satisfy - do you actually need 4 bedrooms or 5? Do you need a garage? Define the vision (in terms of your day to day life) and then work back.

Muddledandmiddle · 04/02/2025 16:26

Gekko21 · 04/02/2025 13:56

Re the windows, are you assuming they need replacing purely because of their age? 15 years doesn't sound old for windows. Unless they are drafty, letting in water, rotting etc. I think you could leave those another decade. If any have blown, could you just get them fixed?

Other than that, I agree that layout is most important. You need to know where you are going with it. You need to note down your key use cases first - what's the problem statement (what's not working for you right now?) and then what needs do you need to satisfy - do you actually need 4 bedrooms or 5? Do you need a garage? Define the vision (in terms of your day to day life) and then work back.

RE the windows- not urgent, they’re fugly but in keeping with house and the neighbours so not murderous aesthetically, they’re water tight and fine- but when it’s windy they whistle 😂 and from a economic front, I think likely losing heat, and they don’t have any trickle vents.

no we don’t need 5 bedrooms, but the 4th we currently have is the typical British “box room” which makes it too small for functional use for one of the kids, and only suitable for a single as a guest room and realistically our guests are always couples (I.e our parents who always come in a pair) so adding a 5th means we could have an office in the box and an actual bedroom for guests. Both of course a luxury and not a necessity—before anyone jumps me—.

its not so much the current layout doesn’t work- in that we’re getting on with it fine, but the main bathroom (the other only has a shower) is on the wrong floor of the house, and we need that space to make the kitchen the size it needs to be- both for enjoyment but also the current kitchen is out of whack for the size of the house. So we need to relocate that. The utility- we have three dogs, and a fucktonne of laundry due to two muddy sports hobbies for the kids.. So the bigger the better really, but again a total luxury, and I’ve never had an actual utility, so putting them into a corner in a multifunctional bathroom ( we’ve already scoped the restrictions around bathroom and electrics etc) wouldn’t be end of world- don’t miss what you’ve never had!

i guess I can’t work out how to know which layout is best because we are living in it as it is fine, and without being able to physically test either how can I know? Quotes for both layouts are on a par so it’s not even really directed by costs either.

such first world problems I can’t bare to whinge in real life about it 😳 but I’m finding it’s plaguing my thoughts.

I also hoped to do a fair bit ourselves but I’m on the cusp of being diagnosed with a chronic health condition so I’m beginning to realise this is unlikely too- I’m barely functioning let alone about to start DIYing 😔

OP posts:
Lemonbalm8 · 04/02/2025 16:59

You should also test for asbestos in the ceilings and roofs.
In terms of 4-5 bedrooms, it depends on whether you need that extra bedroom/study. Value wise I think larger kitchen is better than extra bedroom. It depends on whether the floorplan is top heavy or bottom heavy, it makes more sense to have nicer downstairs than upstairs, but still remain within proportion, if it's tiny upstairs, it's not great and extra bedroom would help. Definitely master being nicer and utility being nicer counts well.

You just have to make lifestyle vs value choices and then get on with the work. I wouldn't let the structural stop you getting on with boiler etc, because once you decide on bedroom vs kitchen, just make choices.
We have 60s house and did full rewiring, drainage, plumbing (hot air was old system), all decorating, floors, bathrooms. Now kitchen, garage extension and perhaps in the longer run windows are missing.

snotathing · 04/02/2025 17:09

Has it already had a full rewire since the 60s, or just bits and pieces? You'd be mad to do all the other work and then have to undo it later for a rewire. We made that mistake before in a house of the same age.

Goldfsh · 04/02/2025 17:15

Lots of good advice here, but overall it sounds as though maybe you are trying to do too much at once.

If you give us a floor plan we will all have opinions/advice...

1960s may need full rewiring unless it's already been done. Boiler/rads essential yes.

Windows - again, I'd say no. Ours are 15 years old in a 1960s and the cost of replacement is INSANE. Also - the walls lose ALL the heat (cavity walls, not suitable for insulating), so upping the windows will make fuck all difference. Just worth thinking about.

TeaAndStrumpets · 04/02/2025 17:28

We have just had a 40 year old boiler replaced. Unless your pipes and radiators are the wrong size, why change them? New radiators aren't always necessary. Ours have been flushed and are now working better than ever. The heating engineer did comment on the poor quality of some modern radiators he's seen. BTW we went to a local company for a quote, and they undercut British Gas by £2000 for exactly the same specification and a 5 year guarantee.

MrsMoastyToasty · 04/02/2025 17:37

Can you give us a floor plan and details about what you're trying to achieve in regards to remodeling the house?

Muddledandmiddle · 04/02/2025 19:56

The boiler is about 30 years old (atleast) very inefficient and all the rads are even older, it’s essentially the one thing that 100% needs to be changed out asap.

the electrics have been checked over and aside from some updating they’re OK- family member who is an electrician is coming for a chat soon so we can take a deeper look and get a better picture of what needs to be done to add in what we know we need, but we all seem fairly confident an actual full rewire would be overkill.

yes I think for the amount of windows we’re looking at 20k for new. 🤮 we can get them re sprayed for circa 2k (they’re dark brown) and if they were newer I think I’d do this but realistically 2k is a couple of windows ( we’ve got huge picture windows and floor to ceiling etc)

I can provide a floor plan but I’ll need to hand draw it- the one the EA did for the listing is pointless, doesn’t include the garage and doesn’t explain the house well- for example it’s got living on the upper floor, bedrooms on the lower, it’s built into the garden so the floor plan can be misleading in thinking you could extend and square off areas etc, that you simply couldn’t do so… it’s a quirky house to say the least.

OP posts:
Oakhouse · 04/02/2025 21:31

This reply has been withdrawn

Withdrawn at poster's request

Nettleskeins · 04/02/2025 23:05

I would live there for a year, get the vibe of the place and not do much at all till then. Doing anything to the garage seems pointless if you haven't decided layout. Windows which whistle are probably stopping condensation. Thick curtains and blinds are a very important first step to conserve heat, worth paying for them right now in cheap form. (Next do nice ones)I'm familiar with a 1960s house bought 4 years ago and all the things the owners leapt into were red herrings until they finally decided on layout and function. And you can't do that without living somewhere for 12 months. Big kitchens are all very well but even that might prove unnecessary. Small functional kitchens and dining rooms next door can prove very pleasant arrangements. Dogs will teach you a lot too about what you need, which doors you go through etc.

Nettleskeins · 04/02/2025 23:07

Upside down house - sounds wonderful btw.

Wigtopia · 04/02/2025 23:14

Cattreesea · 04/02/2025 08:04

Get the basics done first:

  • Make sure the heating and plumbing all work
  • Get the electrics checked (if the previous owners did not provide you with a certificate) to make sure it is all safe
  • Keep an eye on roof and gutters for any leaks
  • Give the house a good clean.

Beyond that take time to unpack: the place will look better with your things in.

I painted all the walls and removed all the carpet myself, painted the fences and the shed...basically make a list of what you can do yourself and what you will need to hire people to do.

Ask for recommendations about local tradespeople.

Take your time! It took about a year for my house and garden to look decent and there is still a lot to do!

This is a good example of the highs and lows of buying something that needs tlc:
https://greenmermaidcottage.blogspot.com/2024/09/from-black-to-green-how-facing-toughest.html

This thumbnail image looked liked a photo of our spare bedroom a few months ago 😃 joists with ruddy chunks cut out of them, some joists needing noggins fitted to them to stop the floorboards springing 🫣🫣

it’s a slog OP but it doesn’t have to all be done at once. As PP have said, start with the basics of electrics, plumbing and gutter checks then one room at a time. For us it was the living room and bedroom that we prioritised to get to comfortable standard but even then we didn’t have proper flooring or even a rug in those rooms for almost a year.

we’ve been in our place 6 years and things are just now finally coming together. It taken so long as we wanted to do as much of the work ourselves for the sense of satisfaction but also cost as you’ve said is so high ( and another reason it’s taken so long, having to save up after each project!) Just hallway, stairs and landing to sort. We would ideally get a new kitchen and bathroom but that is more for aesthetic reasons as both are functional (just ugly!)

Muddledandmiddle · 05/02/2025 01:21

Nettleskeins · 04/02/2025 23:07

Upside down house - sounds wonderful btw.

It’s not for everyone that’s for sure, but we love it!

Thanks all- you’re all right. I’m unnecessarily stressed about it, on reflection I’m hyper fixating because I’m so upset over my health.

oh and yes, asbestos testing is being done next week!

OP posts:
Dogaredabomb · 05/02/2025 02:12

I think just rest for a whole year and the house will tell you what it needs.

I've done that, the decor is somewhat crack den but it was such a massive and stressful move and the new house is so very different to my old house that I'd have gone wrong if I'd started straight away

january1244 · 05/02/2025 08:55

Glad you're having the asbestos survey done soon! We didn't need a full rewire either, but adding lots of wall lights, Opal pendants, dimmer switches etc made such a difference.

Have you spoke to anyone like Karen at OnePlan from Houzz? We did and it clarified our thoughts - and we had CAD drawings and a visual walkthrough of how it would look from our session with her. I actually found this more useful than our architect (but he was needed for the extension).

We also focused on the rooms we weren't changing structurally first, just to make it nicer for us. So the first thing we did was a bathroom, just so we had a 'win' and also a really nice one to use. So much of the initial stages are invisible, this was nice to pick things like tiles and fittings at the beginning. Then we did a lounge - it wasn't our final lounge but just a room that was skimmed, painted, flooring down (carpet as it's now a playroom), pictures on the walls, vases, lamps etc. A nice space for us and for the children to play.

In this weather, def get the radiators and heating done! That was also something we did near the beginning also and made a big difference.

I can't really visualise without a floorplan but I'd say it will feel nicer to have a study and bigger fourth bedroom

Muddledandmiddle · 05/02/2025 16:15

How do I add a photo? I can’t see! I’ve doodled those who are interested a floor plan 😆

OP posts:
january1244 · 05/02/2025 19:44

Hit the paper clip button and add a photo

Cremeeggtime · 05/02/2025 19:45

Muddledandmiddle · 05/02/2025 16:15

How do I add a photo? I can’t see! I’ve doodled those who are interested a floor plan 😆

You can't add photos just now, it has been disabled

Muddledandmiddle · 05/02/2025 20:26

Oh! Well I guess my doodle will go unseen!

OP posts: