I own a house in my university town, where I’ve lived for over 20 years. I truly love it here. DH and our KS1 DC are also happily settled in the area. We fit the vibe, share the local politics, and enjoy the events and traditions. However I have sincere regrets over the house (not least because it’s freezing!). It’s got structural issues and the local area has unfortunately seen a rise in violent crime in recent years. Whilst our immediate neighbours are lovely, overall it isn’t the type of neighbourhood where the DC can go out and play in the street or walk themselves to school (when the time comes), or where I would walk out alone after dusk. There is also a slight risk of flooding, which hasn’t been an issue for decades but with the change of climate is always in the back of my mind. Were we to stay the house needs structural work plus extending (we’re outgrowing it and more than one WC would be nice) and we doubt we’d see the return on the investment. I had romantic ideas of doing it up but it turns out I’m crap at DIY, so is DH and the children arrived ahead of schedule so the available capital dwindled fast. For these reasons (and a few others but trying to be succinct) it feels more logical to invest in a new property, somewhere with a safer vibe and less essential work required to it. If we already lived in one of the nicer parts of town I would happily live here for the rest of my life.
We have the money to cover moving costs, but houses in the areas of town we like are significantly out of our price range. Even extending the search radius doesn’t make much difference. Moving to the outskirts we’d live in a safer neighbourhood, and hopefully wouldn’t need to do structural work but would likely still need to fund an extension. Also several friends have moved 30-60 minutes away in the last few years, and after a few months when they’re settled into their new towns they stop coming back to visit. Taking all this into account DH has suggested we move closer to his work HQ, where property is significantly cheaper.
DH works from home but often has to travel to HQ. If we moved closer then these trips would no longer involve overnight stays and he’d be home more. We’d gain a LOT of house (at least an additional bedroom, bathroom and a garage if not more).The crime rates are lower, the cost of living is more affordable, and the quality of life is reportedly better. Everyone we’ve spoken to from the area raves about it. It's a big move, about a 4 hour drive away.
The pros of moving are undeniable:
- Safer environment
- Smaller class sizes
- A larger home (DC could each have their own room, space to park multiple cars when they're teenagers if needed)
- Lower costs of living (currently very stretched and a bit worried about what will happen if the mortgage rates don't come down in the next 3 years when our term is up)
- DH spending less time away from home
The cons are that our friends, familiarity, and love for this town would be left behind. My job benefits from my local knowledge, so it would be a big adjustment for me. The children would also have to change schools (which they of course would have to do even if we moved half an hour away). Nowhere near enough reasons to stay.
Logically and financially, I know moving makes sense. So why does the thought of it make me feel so scared and sad? Once we go we won’t be able to come back. And sadly as we’re porting our mortgage there isn’t an option to rent first to see if we like it.
Can anyone help me feel better about it? I'm hoping it'll be a case of ripping the bandage off and once we're there it'll be okay, but it's got me in a funk. Not excited about the prospect in the slightest.