To Buy or Not to Buy

[EMWales123]

I sincerely apologise in advance if anyone reading this is not in quite such a lucky position.

Im 40 male and I bought a little 2 (and a half maybe) bed terraced house (galley kitchen and downstairs bathroom) in a very nice town in a cheapish part of the country about 12 years ago. Because it was cheap and I'm an anxious saver, I paid the mortgage off quite a few years ago.

I live alone but have a girlfriend (a few years younger)of just under a year and we're very happy so hopefully that will blossom into marriage and kids.

My house is too small for a family. Since paying off the mortgage I've continued to save most of my income.

I follow local property prices and most houses that tick all my dream boxes are about three times the price of my current house.

I've seen a semi-detached house that ticks almost all my boxes and is double the price of my current house. This is very rare.

I could buy the semi by selling my house and using all my savings. Alternatively I could take a very small mortgage so I have some savings left over.

My girlfriend has effectively no savings but has a good salary.

My question is whether or not to buy...

Pros:

• it's a very nice house and buying it would stop me endlessly feeling uncertain about my future
• my girlfriend would love to live there if we did move in together
• if we wanted to do something like travel for a year before having a family I could rent it out easily
• buying this would mean I wouldn't end up buying something stupidly expensive that would keep me shackled to my current career forever
• this is quite a rare opportunity
• even though I'd be spending all my savings, I'd likely be mortgage free so could still switch career to something less stressful if I wanted
• it offers lots or practical benefits like three double bedrooms, a garage, a proper kitchen, upstairs bathroom, good size garden and space to extend

Cons

• I'd be spending all my savings (but currently I have nothing to spend them on... they just sit there)... I guess I could buy a holiday home somewhere but if I then had kids, that wouldn't be practical to make use of
• I'm sort of not giving my girlfriend as much choice about the future... but given her financial situation and that I know she loves that street, I certainly wouldn't be forcing anything on her
• I'd be taking up a family home when I don't yet have a family so could be depriving others
• if I didn't end up having a family I could wish I'd kept the money for a holiday home or something but to be honest I'd still appreciate having somewhere better than my current house anyway, especially the bigger kitchen and garden even if the extra bedroom isn't essential yet

What would you do? All advice gratefully received

If I were you I’d go for it you’ve nothing to lose and everything to gain from buying it. It sounds perfect house for you and you’ve been thinking about this very deeply. Life’s too short make that offer you definitely won’t regret it.

I’d worry for your girlfriend. Could you keep the two bed and rent it out and buy the semi detached with a joint mortgage and your deposit from your savings ringfenced so she is able to contribute as well?

Thanks!

Potentially... I think that house will get snapped up this week which is a bit soon to suddenly ask my girlfriend to make some big financial and emotional commitments...

My thought there was that if we moved in I could add her name to the ownership for a certain declared percent and agreed to evenly divide any appreciation of the value (rather than appreciation being based on the same percentages) and for me to accept responsibility for any loss of value if the economy goes bang.

Taking up a family home and depriving others?

I question your decision making based on this statement alone.

Sorry, I'm not sure i follow... I don't currently have a family and am not guaranteed to have one. Other people already have families...

If everyone brought homes much bigger than they needed the housing shortage would be even worse than it is.

The odds of having a family are in my favour so I expect to need a family home in the not too distant future. But I can't guarantee it will be needed.

Apologies if I'm being thick and missing your point

The house sounds lovely. I do feel you should protect your investment especially if you buy this house with just you contributing only and your girlfriend moved in with you. What I don’t understand is that if your girlfriend is on a good salary then is there a reason why she hadn’t got any savings? I know it’s awful to think like this but I think you do need to. Money is very important in a relationship. If one person spends every penny and the other person is a saver then that could cause resentment.

You're overthinking it, buy the house, it sounds perfect

Theres no 'worry for the girlfriend'. She either contributes and buys in at a later stage or doesnt, thats on her to be careful with money and make a financial committment in the future too.

OP do protect your assets though as other posters have advised.

You sound lovely OP but some things in life you have to grab with both hands, you are not depriving anyone for the house you have seen will be many more out on the market. In life you have to grab the opportunity for all you know a single person who does not even want a family could beat you to it, a landlord could buy it and rent it out, Someone could buy it in hope of staying for five years and plan to move on, you have worked hard go for it and best of luck 🙂

Go for it

Take your girlfriend out of the picture for now. What would you do if it was just you. Would you be happy to stay where you are as a single man or would you want to move.

I only ask because it's far too early in the relationship to be making big financial decisions based on things that might happen.

If you want it anyway, for yourself, then go for it. But do protect your assets.

What about buying with a small mortgage, so you retain some savings.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting a bigger house, even if you don’t have a family, but particularly if there’s a good possibility of that in the future. I think you should do it for yourself and adjust the finances if and when you and your girlfriend make a long term commitment.

Thanks everyone. I will make an appointment to view it tomorrow 😀

I'll read up on whether keeping my current house would be possible and whether it is worth the hassle / stamp duty etc

Don't know if you want anymore opinions but I think you're overthinking the 'depriving others' bit- you sell your current house, a lucky person will buy it and live there. There's nothing wrong with having a bigger house if you want one. I can understand the anxiety about your hard earned savings being spent but if you're mortgage free, you'll have your income anyway. You sound financially sensible so it wont be hard to build back up a quick buffer emergency fund. I'd stay mortgage free if you can- it's what most people would do if they won the lottery isn't it? buy a house outright... Good luck anyway :)