Would you go into rented or take the risk?

[Shwish]

So we sold our house to FTB back in August. Agreed our onward purchase a couple weeks later. Just as we were all ready to exchange our seller changes their mind and decides not to sell. Our buyers still want our house but don't want to wait ages as they've moved out of their rental and staying with family. and it took us from May to August to get a sale agreed.
We found another chain free house we like, put an offer in, seller accepted it but says she's going to keep it on the market (?) obviously we're not happy to spend on surveys / conveyancing and everything (again!) if seller isn't committed because we'd be taking all the risk while they potentially try and get a better deal elsewhere.
The biggest issue for us really is that we need to be in the new house before next October for school applications. This seems like a long time away but really we put our house on the market back in May and we're almost back to square 1 now. There is nothing else suitable in our price range in catchment at the moment and given the time of year nothing is very likely to come on for a couple of months now at least.
So my question really is WWYD? Take a risk on this seller? Move into rental? Wait till spring to do anything and almost definitely lose our buyer?
Help! I'm so stressed and we just don't know what to do for the best.

Tell your new seller you’re not prepared to spend money on progressing the purchase until they take it off the market?

No way would I be buying a house off someone who refuses to take it off the market. Idk what's going on but there was another thread about the same thing yesterday.

Yes I would consider moving into a rental to get the house sold. It's alright if your buyers live with family short term, but frictions can be abundant over xmas, and you are more appealing as a seller if your house is vacant - and it shows you are serious about selling it. So, if your buyers pull out, your house will be very attractive to serious buyers who start to appear on the market around February.

House selling and buying is so crap. Good luck.

When you say "move into a rental" do you actually have options for a short term rental - rental properties are hard to come by right now. If you don't have a friend or relative with a property that you can use I think you might struggle to carry out this plan purely on struggling to find a rental.

You will also have a problem if you sign a contract for a rental property and your house sale then falls through.

If you can find somewhere temporary to live you will become very attractive as buyers as you will be chain free.

I wouldn't move into a rental.

So I have a family member with an empty house. They are hoping to sell next year but have said we can stay rent free till the spring as long as we don't mind letting them get work done when they need to. If we needed longer than spring we'd have to look at renting properly.
I just can't decide what to do!

I think if you have a house available to live in then go for it. You will then be in a strong position as buyers. You could always pay some rent (as well as bills and council tax) - then your family member might not feel in a rush to sell if buying drags on a bit.

this

You’ve got a house you can stay in rent free until the Spring & you don’t know whether to sell your house to buyers who have been proceeding on it since August?

Never thought I would use these Mumsnet words but Give your head a wobble.

Get your house sold & the money in the bank. Move into the rent free house & make finding a house you can buy your top priority. You will be every sellers dream buyer once you have already sold.

Don't lose your buyers.
Go into empty house. That buys you time.
Then look for both new house to buy and a rental to rent from Spring when your relative wants their house back.
Meanwhile tell the seller if house you'd like to buy that they take it off the market or you're not interested. Don't invest time and money in a flaky seller.

All you can do is tip the probabilities of things going your way, but you can't predict everything so it feels scary.
This approach will maximise the chances of success of the various fronts, there is no easy answer here cos none of your options are risk free.
Offer of empty house is very helpful though!

I would sell and move into the rent free house. With the recent budget and labour policies, house prices aren’t going to rise. You need to be in catchment so I’d make sure you are by the deadline whether in a rental or bought property.

We can't officially pay rent because then family member would become a landlord and it would have tax implications wouldn't it? Obviously we'd pay our bills.

Fair enough. You could treat them now and then. Basically don’t let them feel taken for granted.

We are prepared to move into rented to get our sale through. The thought of having to start the whole process again is seriously off putting!

We actually agreed to do the same but we realised that we wouldn't be able to complete before January if we broke the chain because of our mortgage early repayment charge.
Obviously our buyers were disappointed to have to wait that long (fair enough) but they started adding more and more demands. We've decided to withdraw unless they can wait for us to exchange on our onwards. It's chain free so it shouldn't be that long but I do completely understand they want certainty. But then so do I! It's just too hard moving with 2 kids and pets when we don't know how long it'll be for. Especially with all the extra demands they were putting on us. Honestly I feel relieved. I've been so stressed with it all I can't sleep and my hair has been falling out. So that's the end of the road for us for now sadly. We'll try again early next year.