Moved to a busy road

[Flipflop356]

We’ve recently moved out of London to a large house in the countryside, in a lovely area. We’ve been here for about a month or so but at the weekend a friend from London came and highlighted how busy our road was and how badly connected we are eg can’t walk to shops etc. This has now all gone to my head and I’m feeling so so anxious that I can barely eat or sleep. I just feel like I’ve made a huge mistake (dh, ds (3) and dd (1) and what was meant to be our ‘forever home’ is a bit of a nightmare. The road isn’t an a or b road but it’s a cut through and seems to be busy in the morning and evening during rush hour. It’s all I can think about and it’s really consumed me. I guess I’m looking for advice and would like to hear any positive stories of families in similar situations? I’m loving the area but fear we chose the wrong house and now it’s too late. I’m spiralling with it and I need to think rationally about it. Please help!

Do you have a history of anxiety or mental health issues? It’s very extreme to be so focused on this and decide it’s the wrong house based on a friends comments, you were fine with the road before they said anything and knew you can’t walk to shops. Which for me is irrelevant.

If you are happy there and like it there then that is all that matters. All roads are busy now especially during rush hours. 😊

Surely you knew it was a busy road and you couldn't walk to the shops, before you even moved in? Personally I'd hate to be car reliant, and have to drive kids/eventually teens everywhere, but that must have been a consideration for you. You can't change it so you'll just have to accept it.

So you've been there a month and had no problem with the location until your friend mentioned it, can't be much of a problem then surely.

You were fine in that month prior to this so called friend saying these things.

Just because it wouldn't suit your friend, doesn't mean it has to bother you. Focus on the good bits.

People from towns and cities expect the countryside to be quiet and get a shock when it is not.

If it didn't bother you before, don't let it bother you now.

and how badly connected we are eg can’t walk to shops etc

^ yeah, that's rude/inconsiderate

Maybe just let future guests know it's not a quiet, idyllic hamlet and that it does actually have traffic/other countryside noise.

I stayed in what looked like an idyllic hotel last week that had lorries thundering past from 5.30am til 10.30pm.

Shrug.

Countryside!

Wrong house? I'd say wrong 'friend'. Ignore her. Perhaps she's just envious.

Wrong friend, not wrong house, otherwise you wouldn't have moved there?

There seems to be this thing about being able to walk to the shops and have " all amenities on the doorstep"
As convenient as that may be and a must for many, realistically, many people do survive by driving a short distance to the shops etc.

Enjoy your new surroundings and focus on the positives!

You e only just moved to the area. You’ll barely know your way around yet - have you looked to see if a public footpath or bridal path is nearby? Often there are footpaths etc in more rural areas

footpathmap.co.uk/

This exactly.

case of the green eyed monster I think. We moved to what we thought was a quiet rural area and I remember feeling uneasy about the traffic initially as it far more than I’d anticipated. You get used to it over time though. Remember too that they can’t hear you!

Everyone is different and your friends priorities are obviously not yours. It's very very normal.for countryside dwellers to have to use their car for everything! If you were in walking distance of a shop then you wouldn't be in the country!

It's all about perspective, yours has been rocked vy some frivolous comments that tbh come across as a little ncious to me. Take a deep breath and remember the reasons you moved out of London.

What your friend wants in a home/house isn't the same as what you want. End of. Enjoy your new place!

Ignore your friend!

Ditch the friend, keep the house, get some help with your anxiety.