We have a grade II listed late Georgian house that we inherited and (for various legal reasons) can't sell anyway at the moment. It was my family home and is a really great house but when I inherited it part of it was in an absolutely derelict state and the liveable bit was working but things are falling apart at quite a clip. We are not living in it though.
The best thing we did was employ a local architect who we got on really well with and, because the house is pretty rural, she knows local builders and the planning and conservation officers really well. She mainly works on houses with a listing so isn't going to go far out of what is allowed.
We had spoken to a couple of builders who didn't seem keen (it is an eight bedroom place all in all) and so much needed to be done that we found it hard to find anyone. Again our architect said she had worked with a company before and showed us their work and the scale of things they had done and gave us their details. We now have a great medium sized company who will do what we want when it is needed and have been great.
Again planning and conservation was much better because she put in all our applications and was able to get the conservation officer round, during Covid, who said they would rush things through because it was falling in and might kill someone.
The quote is high, we think it might add up to £350k hopefully not much more but we want to do things properly (lime plaster, lime pointing, original or reclaimed slates, reclaimed materials where possible, everything done as historically as possible secondary glazing throughout).
It is such a privilege to own the building. It was there long before me and, if we do things properly it will be there long after I have gone. Dad always said we are only temporary custodians and need to look after things for the future. I love this philosophy, and want to make it a pleasure to live in while retaining the history.
I can recommend SPAB as they have so much free advice if you are a member, and run courses which are really practical. Also the Facebook group 'Your Old House UK', which is amazing for knowledge on how to do things well.
One thing to be aware of which I have found very difficult (the rest I was pretty knowledgeable on) was how difficult it is to get home insurance for an unoccupied building in a somewhat dilapidated state. It took 7 months and if the rebuild cost (not the value of the building) is over £1m, which for a listed building it probably will be (value of our house £500k - rebuild cost 1.7m!), very few places will agree to insure you. We finally got some through Abode brokers but it's expensive - once it is done though it will be much cheaper!
Good luck, it is such a wonderful privilege to live in an old house (funds permitting!) and bringing (potentially) yours back to a loving family home will be a wonderful legacy!