Odd behaviour from builder

[socksandshoos]

In the process of getting quotes for a refurb. Budget £50k. Usual hassle of builders not responding after site visit so still looking. Have started with the garden, gardeners said they knew someone

Initial visit I was in one room, front door was open, he met the gardener on the way in & asked where the loo was. Eventually came down, saw me & was embarrassed not realising I was there. Did the walk round, said he get a quote to me.

Then got a text next day saying he would be going to the house & with a structural engineer & the gardener will let him in. I explained I already had one booked at that same time & id like him to provide a quote before we proceed further. He then turned up before the SE arrived, waited and followed us around chipping in with comments. He then stayed chatting & watching me rip up carpets & do general clearance while the gardeners left for lunch, leaving when they got back saying he didn’t want to leave me on my own (I’m 48). Stayed over 2 hours

Received another text last night saying he’d been at the house today with a plumber and was waiting for the plumbers quote.

Hes also texted the gardeners asking them to set up a WhatsApp for the 3 of us so we can discuss stripping the house to reduce costs

Ive checked his company, he does clearances & maintenance, he’s not a builder. How do I tell him I’m not interested in working with him. I’m worried he’s going to keep just turning up if I don’t say anything, plus I’m fuming he’s offering work to the gardeners on my behalf

Seriously weird and concerning behaviour. Just tell him you're proceeding with someone else and say you won't be needing him anymore.

He's pushing his way in. Just message and say you have gone with someone else. Then block.

Red flags, he will do what he wants not what you want him to as he’s already set up a dynamic of swanning around and saying he feels protective of you. Yuck! Don’t work with him, tell him you’re going with someone else then block. And I’d be giving side eye to the gardener too, sounds like they work together, might have to give him up too.

Builders are up how their eyeballs with work. Many tradesman are like gold dust. The fact that he has time on his hands to loiter around your house shows he's not in demand or busy.

Avoid taking him on.

I agree with the pps saying you need to clearly tell him you're not going to use his services. I also wonder in this weird situation whether you may need to inform others working in your home, or at the very least be prepared to speak to him in front of others. Don't let him hang about, like when you were tearing up carpets or seeing about the plumber, that is a kind of implicit agreement to his presence.

When he turned up and started following you around, that was the time you needed to tell him to go away. If he's like this now he will be a nightmare for the project. Sounds like he would just do whatever he liked and disregard you totally. Send a message saying you've gone with someone else and not to visit your property again. If he turns up tell him to go, and mean it.

Agree, tell him you won't be engaging his services.

Also, speak to your gardener. They should not be letting people in to the house without your permission in advance. Why do they even have your keys, is there no side access?

No side access so gardeners have to go through the house, hence why I’m doing that first.

Sent this just now
thanks for your interest but we’ve decided to go with someone else so don’t worry about putting together a quotation

He pinging back instantly saying thanks & good luck. Also texted gardeners to say I’m going with someone else & not to let him in without my permission.

Thanks for your replies, sooo many red flags!