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Original poster

Getting my own back on my neighbour?

31 replies

fedupwithbeinggotat · 14/12/2023 13:50

I accept I am probably going to be got at more, but I am at the end of my tether.

I live alone in the upstairs flat of a one up one down maisonette. I'm very quiet and boring! My neighbour downstairs is HORRIBLE. She calls the council when I have my niece and nephews over for sleep overs (only twice a year). Bangs on the door telling us to be quiet (we are literally only talking, the children are so good). If I play music during the day, normal regular, not too loud music she calls the council. I think the council are sick of her, but they can't say. We share a garden and it's pretty clear she upset my plants and turned over the pots, It's all just too much. I did DIY, put up some IKEA wardrobes and she called building control saying i was doing unlawful works! They came round and I had to show them my wardrobes.

I just want to do something back to her. I know it sounds bad, but sometimes you have to push back on a bully.

What could I do that is annoying, but totally lawful? I won't turn over her plants or anything, thats horrible to the plants. I thought about painting my part of the house an awful colour!!! It would drive her mad! I'm sure!

I'm just so fed up.

OP posts:
TeapotCollection · 14/12/2023 13:56

Shit on her doorstep

HappyHamsters · 14/12/2023 13:57

Report her to the council for harassment, put up a security camera, report her for criminal damage if she damages any of your property. Do you own or rent from the council, do you have a housing officer. Alternatively kill her with kindness, be extra nice and that will annoy and unsettle her.

TeapotCollection · 14/12/2023 13:57

OK maybe not, someone nearby will probably have a Ring doorbell

Squeaky2023 · 14/12/2023 13:59

Sign up her address for anger management info to be sent to her. Even better if you have her phone number.

Arewethebadguys · 14/12/2023 14:01

TeapotCollection · 14/12/2023 13:56

Shit on her doorstep

Omg just spilled my coffee. Brutal 🤮

biedrona · 14/12/2023 14:08

Just ignore her

lesdeluges · 14/12/2023 14:09

If you haven't already, you need to face her down in person. Bullies often scarper or shut up when they meet their match.

I was in a similar (but not quite the same) situation many years ago. The long standing neighbours couldn't understand how I - a youngish single woman could buy a house in THEIR neighbourhood lol 😉

They did their best to make me uncomfortable, found fault with every bloody thing I did to the house and were very petty. It drove me mad purely because all their comments and demands were ridiculous. I made no noise, had no pets, was a great neighbour to the other side and vice versa, so I knew they were trying to intimidate me, I was convinced it was out of envy.

I knocked on their door and let it rip. When I had finished I asked them to be neighbourly and not bully me, because that was not going to happen. Good day etc, It stopped and believe it or not we are now great neighbours. The woman of the house was ill and the husband was at the end of his rope and he explained that and apologised.

Speak to her and let her have it between the eyes. It's the only way.

Terrribletwos · 14/12/2023 15:58

You had nephews twice a year so that's just 2 complaints. You had wardrobe fitted one complaint
She may or may not have knocked over your plants, one instance.

Hardly think it's worth being bothered about.

Just ignore her.

Terrribletwos · 14/12/2023 16:00

Lesdeluges:

Interested in what they said was their complaint and how they justified it?

SoupDragon · 14/12/2023 16:01

Terrribletwos · 14/12/2023 15:58

You had nephews twice a year so that's just 2 complaints. You had wardrobe fitted one complaint
She may or may not have knocked over your plants, one instance.

Hardly think it's worth being bothered about.

Just ignore her.

Did you miss that she also calls the council if the OP plays any music?

Terrribletwos · 14/12/2023 16:03

The music must be loud if the neighbour is hearing it tho?

ActDottie · 14/12/2023 16:14

Report her for harassment to the council. Keep a record of every instance.

Id also install a camera so you can get evidence of the garden stuff. If she’s deliberately destroying your plants then it’ll be good to capture it.

I do like your idea of painting the top half of the flat a bright colour. Could you put something in your window like a flag that you know she’ll be really disapproving of? Or something in the garden you know she’ll hate? I know it’s petty but with neighbours like this it’s the small wins. We have neighbours who complain constantly about us and even reported us to the council and every petty little win we get makes me feel so much better!

lesdeluges · 14/12/2023 16:28

@Terrribletwos Oh it was everything and anything, so petty and inconsequential that I have largely forgotten exactly what! I didn't push it too much in the end. Once Mr. Bully explained that they were under great stress due to wife's illness and apologised then that was that and we moved on. Quite harmoniously in the end. They over compensate a bit now 😊

Mischance · 14/12/2023 16:36

This is what you do ....... shit in a paper bag, put it on her doorstep, light the bag with a match, ring the doorbell and run away. She will come to the door, see the flames and instantly try and stamp them out - bingo!! 😂Seriously though, I am sorry you are at loggerheads with your neighbours - it is not a good situation to be in.

furtivetussling · 14/12/2023 16:43

She is making vexatious complaints. Next time anything happens, contact the council and tell them exactly that. Most local councils will often deal with people who make persistent vexatious complaints against neighbours, so you need to use that actual term.

kneesdonthurt · 14/12/2023 17:41

I know this will sound mad but we once had terrible neighbours who did similar things to us so at Christmas, I went round with a lovely box of biscuits and a card. I smiled sweetly and wished her a happy Christmas. The look on her face was utterly priceless. And from that moment on, it stopped. She lived there another 10 years until she died and although we were never friends, all the aggro just stopped and we were able to peacefully co-exist.

Original poster
fedupwithbeinggotat · 14/12/2023 23:17

I have been ignoring so far. I did once outline to her what she had done so far, and even as it came out of my mouth I knew it sounded really bad and that she probably felt shame. Cue to response - more nonsense a few days later. If you make someone feel small, they then go on to act it. So, I think I'm going to go with the killing with kindness strategy. There is no way i can get in trouble for that, and if she continues she'll feel even more shame about it.

I can also tell my little niece and nephews that aunty is being a good girl!

OP posts:
Dizzydahlias · 14/12/2023 23:22

I’d set an alarm to go off just after leaving the house. It’s petty but irritating.

Redhairblackheart · 14/12/2023 23:23

Thats harassment, shes using 2rd parties to do it indirectly. Report to the police

Redhairblackheart · 14/12/2023 23:23

3rd*

Original poster
fedupwithbeinggotat · 15/12/2023 10:30

(We do have a working fireplace, with mine directly above hers. I don't use mine. I did think about leaving the radio on talk radio 24/7 - maybe even a foreign language one?! - and positioning it down the chimney breast. Wasn't sure it would work. That was the extent of my evil machinations!)

OP posts:
KievLoverTwo · 15/12/2023 12:18

fedupwithbeinggotat · 15/12/2023 10:30

(We do have a working fireplace, with mine directly above hers. I don't use mine. I did think about leaving the radio on talk radio 24/7 - maybe even a foreign language one?! - and positioning it down the chimney breast. Wasn't sure it would work. That was the extent of my evil machinations!)

Nah. Put Captain Sensible's Happy Talk on a loop, then go away for a week.

zaazaazoo · 15/12/2023 12:23

Kill with kindness

trulyunruly01 · 15/12/2023 12:32

Go down to b and a and buy one of those motion activated Fathers Christmas that go off every time a door is opened with resounding 'ho ho ho and a very merry Xmas to you ho ho ho and a very merry Xmas to you ho ho ho and a very merry Xmas to you ho ho ho'
See how annoying it is?
And place it exactly, exactly, so that the bastard thing comes to life every time she opens her door.

DyslexicPoster · 15/12/2023 12:32

TeapotCollection · 14/12/2023 13:56

Shit on her doorstep

This. Give her something really to moan about. Go and find some dead plants and plant them up in the garden. Play music way to loud. Drop a dumbell on the floor above bedroom at 3am. Leave some fish guts outside to waft into her windows. Feed the pigeons, fed the cats and rats.

Seriously I had a horrible neighbour. I got them to leave by playing music from 12am to 7am full blast after asking them repeatedly not to bang about upstairs after 12pm ( took boots off and threw them, loud shagging with the windows open and screaming, hoovered at 3am, let the bath overflow whilst in and wouldn't open his door it was pissing down the wall etc) he was a prise a hole and we had been nothing but polite and reasonable. Flooding our flat was the last straw. He was treating us like shit so I stepped up to be the shit he deserved.

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