Handhold needed - am I making a mistake? Is it big enough?

[Gardensofa]

Hi - a handheld needed, please be gentle.

I am about to buy a property. It's taken forever to save and finally get a mortgage. As a single parent and weighing up my earning potential (low-earner, in my 40s), it is pretty much the only thing I'll be able to give my DC. If I've made a mistake I won't be able to go back. We'll be stuck with it.

It is a flat with 4 other flats and has a lovely view. It is ground floor and has all the horrors of artex, flocked wallpaper and a shared garden. The other occupants seem pleasant. It's not my preferred area but I cannot afford to be in a better one or a bigger place. It's close to school and shops and transport links into the city though. It's around the same price as other flats on the street. Most are in better nick but with less space or are in buildings with more flats.

I only have the images to go on as where I am, once you put in an offer, you cannot see it again until you're effectively in a legally binding contract. (I only learned this later). I saw it nearly 3 months ago. My solicitor keeps asking me if I'm okay to go ahead and I'm just filled with fear.

Is this normal? It is chest tightening anxiety. What can I do for it?
My instincts are so messed up due to anxiety, I no longer trust my gut.
It's about 70m2, has one double bedroom, one single, one kitchen diner, one bathroom, one bedroom. I'm worried it won't be big enough either?

Has anyone felt like this? Did it turn out to be okay?
I don't think it will make a profit but I need to stop renting (at double what the mortgage will be). Thanks for reading.

I did try to hint but was fobbed off and that is fair enough tbh.

Could you get a friend to view it and you accompany them? You may have to wear a disguise though.

Thanks for this story..this is how I'm feeling.
I think part of my fear is that the person selling is acting on behalf of an estate so cannot provide me with clear answers. Any answers I've got have been from the neighbours who have been there 7 and 4 years each.

It's just where I am buying. I've been mornings, evening and weekend.
No penalty, it's just not allowed.
I think just having a "in case I need to move again" fund sounds good - as soon as I can, I will.

It's hard to get parked at certain times.
I could add my garden furniture and finally dry clothes outside (weather permitting).
For the price I could move out slightly and get a whole house but in not such a convenient area. I've spent a looong time being isolated from friends and family so the buzz of life around me will feel good.

So it's not in the UK?

Are there also strange rules and penalties if you want to sell it in future?

Haha. They don't allow it to be viewed once under offer.
I'll repost once I'm in (if I go ahead) and let you know if I've bought a lemon.

This sounds like a truly bonkers system. Still sounds like you should go ahead though!

We had this (Scotland) and were caught out by it. We had bought before in Scotland and never encountered it but some solicitors insist on it. You can get them to let professionals in thought. We sent round a friendly builder and they had to allow that. We had to have something specific and so we insisted on checking our insulation and they allowed this.

We were pretty cross and we would have insisted on another viewing before our offer was made.

But, our gut was right. Trust yours.

It sounds lovely, op, and cosmetic issues can be dealt with in time.

As for your nerves, there is nothing unusual about that. Buying/selling property is ridiculously stressful, even when it's "easy."

I think you've found a little gem to call home.

It sounds like you’ve had a really tough time of it. That’s probably affected your confidence and optimism.

The flat sounds like it could be great for you both: the view for, the space. The Artex can be dealt with as and when and that will be another boost when you can do it. Your child will thank you for the proximity to transport and shops as they enter their teenage years. The nice neighbours can’t be guaranteed to stay but are another big positive.

I moved into a grotty tiny house with artex and hideous decor after living with my mum for a year with my children after leaving an awful man. Honestly it was a happy place for us.

My eldest was 10 I think and although her dad was in a huge Georgian rectory, she loved our cosy nights watching Friends and Frazier. I made sure we created nice new traditions and treats in our new house. Things like hot chocolate in “special” mugs, = mugs, sitting on chairs on the patch of grass in the sun sipping cocktails (coke in fancy glasses with a straw and fruit).

I think it sounds potentially lovely, and all yours!

@Gardensofa

it sounds like it's the best place you can
afford to buy?

the mortgage is half your rent.

the neighbours seem nice enough. Not wanted druggies.

I don't see what you have to lose really?

it sounds much the same size as my flat.

I've had a double bed in the second room, when my god daughter lived with me.

the layout will obviously affect how the space feels. I'd happily have an 8 year old share the space.

one of the best things to do is see if the internal doors are helping/hindering with feel of the space. I had a 4 rehung so they opened differently (2 to the other wall & 2 so they open into the other space & A couple taken off entirely. It made a HUGE difference & wasn't expensive.

with DC being 8, a shared garden is ok. Check your deeds properly to see what is/isn't permitted in the shared garden so you know where you're at, then just see how it's currently being shared.

im excited for you!!

it's stability & security, I'd buy it.

I think it sounds great! I've always lived in flats with shared gardens and I'm a big fan. And I think you're right picking this area over a less great area for a bigger house. It sounds big enough. If in the future when your DC is a bit older and really wants friends round in their room you could always swap rooms and you take the single. (Not saying you should at all! But just if you are worried it might not be future proof, there are ways to make it work longer term if needs be.)

I agree, that you could swap bedrooms especially when your son is older and needs to have extra space for studying .

Tell them you are backing out if you don't get a second viewing.

Inside is easily changed. The small block and views are what cannot be so you are right to prioritise those.

Sounds a good size to me. If the single bedroom is small but there's a cupboard in hall then you can always use that as a wardrobe and stick to lower height storage in bedroom so it feels more airy.

I have done quick fix decorating on flat and house that had a liking for pink and custard yellow. If wallpaper is up well you can paint white/magnolia (something cheap) over it. It's not perfect but worth an afternoon to freshen the place up and make it liveable until you can do it properly.

The kitchen is a good size and having a table there is so useful.

As a share of freehold do you pay a service charge so a fund builds up in case, say, the building needs painting?

Your lawyer ought to be able to find this kind of thing out. Plus what bills are coming up in the future? E.g. redecorating the communal areas.

In my share of freehold block the lease says this must be done every 7 years for example.

We had this when we purchased 2 years ago, we couldn't view again after our offer was accepted. I'd never had it when buying previous 5 houses! I was was very suspicious but it was OK, they hadn't trashed anything. Very stupid rule though. We seen our house once then didn't see inside again until we got the keys 6 months later.

Check out sinking fund is set up properly as most often all flats jointly liable for roof repairs even if you're not directly under roof. Also any rules regarding your ability to rent out the property in future in case your circumstances change eg equivalent of Energy efficiency classification in uk or anything stayed in primary lease.

When I was three years older than your boy, a cabin bed with an inbuilt desk and wardrobe was so exciting. It even had a crawl space underneath so I had a little private den. It was just great - it felt magical for little me.

It is a small room but I am sure you can store his overflow clothes in your room and make some space in his own, plus have a dedicated cupboard or two in the lounge (bureau desks are good for multi purposing).

The flat space is generous for a one parent family. It's wonderful that there is room in the kitchen for a table. You can help him with homework whilst cooking, and teach him some cooking basics to break up the tedium of the more challenging study subjects.

You will both love having a green space outside, and meet lots of other families and make new friends. I am sure you will become part of a support network.

If you liked it on your viewing, trust your gut.

You will look back a year from now and be so grateful you went ahead with it.

Enjoy :)

@Cismyfatarse - that is good to know. Thank you. Glad they let you have a builder in!
@Aquamarine1029 - I hope it is a gem. In the back of my mind I keep thinking of the sales they had fall through and perhaps the other buyers saw something I missed!
@LightDrizzle - glad you found your happy place and I'm sorry you had to find a "happy place" after challenging times. I love these traditions. You're right, it's been a tricky few years and it's caused me to doubt myself all the time. On the plus side, I'm free now and bad relationships are very good teachers.
@Pinkpinkpink15 - thank you for putting it into perspective and it's a good tip about the doors.
@NotStayingIn - I was actually considering taking the single bedroom. I don't really have many material things apart from books and lead a pretty monastic life at the moment. Dating has fallen flat...but that's another thread.

Thanks @ApolloandDaphne, @JustWimpy , @Dalhoussie , @Diymesss , @Shpeech , @RubyBoozeDay , @FallingAutumnLeaf , @SisterMichaelsHabit , @Cloverforever - thanks for the early replies and tips. Sorry if I missed anyone out in replies, direct mentions.
@BoothsChristmasBook - no strange penalties. I guess anyone buying it from me wouldn't be able to see it after offering either officially... (but I'd let them if they needed to).

@Mosaic123 - they split things equally as and when. Can you believe I had to get this basic info from my new potential neighbours.
@Nauticalthemedloo - I know how you feel. I hope that when you did get the keys there was no big surprise.
@FrontEnd - one of the flats in the block is rented out so assume it would be fine.
@KievLoverTwo - thanks for listing the positives. It was only the second flat I'd viewed and I'd picked it over a new build house that was only slightly more expensive. Even after my offer was accepted, I kept viewing others - some of which were loads nicer but more expensive.
@YoNoTengo - I could sell it but it's been sat on the market for ages as have other flats on this street so I know it won't be the easiest sell down the road. I'm seeing this as a long term move and a "if I mess it up, I'll make the most of it". It's a pragmatic location and apart from the view in the long distance, not the prettiest of areas. Getting to this point where someone is gives me a mortgage is a big deal and the first year will take all of my money just to buy it, pay the taxes and fees and move.

@Calmdown14 - thanks - I hope my priorities are okay. I figured I can't change the location, or view, or number of co-habitants in the block.
The parking is going to be an issue from previous visits but I guess we'll both just have to park elsewhere and walk, burn off calories if there are no spaces.

I can always declutter (mainly my DC's stuff as I've purged mine) or live simpler...
Custard yellow and pink :)
You're right. Apart from the damp work to make the lounge liveable, I'll paint the worst room. There's one that is lilac and silver textured wallpaper and the kitchen area has dark brown tiles that may need painting over.

@KievLoverTwo - I really wanted a table in the kitchen so I could interact while cooking. I saw a whatsapp group flyer for the street on the back of the main front door so that helped me think that the street is community minded.

Thanks all for taking the time to reply. To have all the positives and things to watch in one space is good. I've felt pretty alone and scared about this so have been focusing on the "what if" negatives by myself.

It sounds great, last minute nerves are normal and you may have them for a while

@SisterMichaelsHabit - wow you are in close quarters at the moment x I really hope your househunt reaps rewards soon. My relatives told me to buy a bigger house (not flat) even if it was further away and my "view" could be my front and back garden so there is that.

Before I secured the mortgage, the most perfect terraced house came along. Amazing views, needed cosmetic work, lots of potential and space, own garden, but it went before I could offer to a developer and made an enormous profit once flipped 18 months later. However, it was a drive to shops and busses and school (but I would have taken it). I think in the back of my mind, I'm still after that same unicorn but it's not happened since.