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Desperate So DESPERATE to sell our house....its ruining our lives

23 replies

desperatedora · 06/03/2008 12:39

Just want to know/offer/accept moral suppost for anyone else in our situation .

Have been trying to sell our two bed house for over 18 months, mainly due to 'history' of house (was hs my dp bought with his v. unpleasant ex) and also wanting a second child, which is just not feasable in this tiny house).

Were under offer last year but sale fell through as we got 'gazumped' TWICE by people who were chain free on two houses we wanted to buy.

Long quiet period and eventually dropped our price by about 10% purely for a quick sale. lots of viewings and one offer from a chain free buyer, he knocked us down by another 5% leaving it very very tight but we are realists and were prepared to bite the bullet to move on. Found another house, not of our dreams but good enough, vendor would not budge an inch on the asking price so got shafted again there.

Spent over £1000 on evrything so far, only to find out on tuesday that our f***g buyer has CHANGED HIS MIND!!!!!!!!!!

Yes I know in the current system he has that absolute legal right but FGS, we were due to exchange today. he has give all manner of spurious reasons but what it boild down to is that he has sat on his arse for a month, then just after we get the survey done on the place we want, all searches done last week etc etc, THEN he pulls out.

WHY WHY OH WHY!!!!!!!!!

Am becoming genuinely desperate and feel we are trapped here. getting older so prospects of having another DC getting less and less.....

sorry that turned into a rant!

OP posts:
pedilia · 06/03/2008 14:32

I know how you feel, it is sooooo frustrating. I don't know why the system in this country allows buyers to be able to pull out right up to the point of exchange.

We are considering moving again but not sure I can go through the trauma of the property market again!

I hope you sell soon, out of interest where is your house? 2 beds round here go like hotcakes, even with the slowing of the market.

Sonnet · 06/03/2008 14:36

How about selling and moving into rented for a bit.

if i understand your OP correctly you have lost two sales because you were gazumped on the house youwere purchasing? - this being the case you will avoid that problem by moving into rented.

You will also be chain free when buying

I know it is a pian moving into rented with the possibility of moving agian very shortly but it is a way out of your current prediciment.

Keep smiling, i know how frustrating it all is!

jellies · 06/03/2008 14:41

You have my every sympathy, we were stuck in this exact position with DC no 2 on the way we ended up renting our house till it sold £20,000 under the asking price and renting somewhere ourselves for a year.. now have no 3 in our lovely family home. it will happen!

desperatedora · 06/03/2008 14:56

Thanks for the replies.......

The main problem with renting is that we have a hefty redemption on our current mortgage. They will only give us 12 weeks 'grace' between selling one place and completing on another, so really the only real option is to be in a chain

No one in rl seems to understand how this is making us feel. It is like being in limbo and constantly having to 'keep up appearances' for viewings most of which seem to be people who do them for a hobby .

Dp and I are just desperate to move on literally and emotionally and it is causing us to 'turn' on each other............

OP posts:
jellies · 06/03/2008 16:48

I totally understand I got to the point I couldn't even be in the house when they showed people round.. I could have cried when I got back every time after the washing putting every little thing of the childrens out of sight.. and putting buggies, playpens, highchairs and bouncers in the garrage to make the house look less squashed! We only moved into rented and accepted a rediculous offer on the house because it was that or end up divorced! We were literally on top of each other, DH was going into work on his days off to finish stuff off becuase he just couldn't do anything from the house and quite frankly it gave him some space!

Scattybird · 06/03/2008 16:50

Any chance you could rent the house out for a while and rent yourselves. At least you would still have a property.

I know it's not ideal but currently lots of my friends seem to be stuck in chains.

LIZS · 06/03/2008 16:51

Could you find a newbuild offering part exchange or look at Oakleaf properties where others have done that and Barrett then sell on.

Scattybird · 06/03/2008 16:56

The only problem with that Lizs, is you DO get less than market value, so I guess it's dependent on how much your mortgage is, and whether you are depending on equity to pay debts etc.

If you are not, then that's a brilliant idea.

wannaBe · 06/03/2008 17:06

oh sympathy.

On the plus side though, we're reaching the time of year where the market does generally pick up.

it's so frustrating though having to clean/tidy constantly in the hope that house will sell.

we went through this last year and our house was on the market for 9 months because we wanted to move closer to dh's job. in the end we just gage up.

NorthernLurker · 06/03/2008 17:13

It's terrible isn't it - we have a buyer for our house atm and we have somewhere we've loved for 6 months - but I am gripped with fear that our buyer will pull out He doesn't need a mortgage so it's up to him what he does about a survey - I'm so scared he will get one after we've paid out loads for our purchase and then walk away! Wouldn't it be great if we could just go to sleep and wake up when the whole thing was done with!

lalalonglegs · 06/03/2008 19:55

I had a lovely house and I grew to hate it because it took so long to sell (it took four offers and 15 months in the end). If you are really desperate, you could think about putting it in an auction which would at least take the waiting out of it - it either sells or it doesn't on the day. It is demoralising and you feel a real moron for having bought a house that no one else wants but, unless there is some huge problem with it, it will sell.

Have you considered: new agents/multi-agency
offering a few hundred pounds sweetener to whichever member of staff shifts it for you
advertising privately
leafleting local businesses (if there are any conveniently nearby such as a large company/hospital) to let them know that your house is on the market?

JamInMyWellies · 06/03/2008 20:03

really feel for you we are in the process of selling have found our dream house offer accepted and we have had an offer on ours that we accepted way below the asking as we wanted to move swiftly but we appear to have a buyer who takes ages to do everything. Keep expecting him to change his mind and pull out. GAH.

Keep your chin up I know the fake smile and constant cleaning and tidying is hard.

desperatedora · 06/03/2008 20:23

Have spent last few days alternating between wanting to scream and wanting to cry

Feel like writing a letter to the shitty man (sorry am not usually such a venomous nutter type!) and telling him EXACTLY what I think of his pathetic selfish time wasting actions........would this be mad? Wont change anything I know but might make me feel ever so slightly better.......

At least from other peoles posts and replies i am not alone.................

OP posts:
Youcannotbeserious · 06/03/2008 20:28

I'm afraid he's done nothing 'wrong' (legally) so I think you're probably just best to leave it.

It is very frustrating, especially as you can't just rent for a while.

I'm afraid I think a lot of buyers are dragging their heels at the moment, waiting to see if there's any movement in the housing situation (like a crash!)....

southeastastra · 06/03/2008 20:31

i didn't realise buyers could just pull out at the point of exchange, that's terrible.

expatinscotland · 06/03/2008 20:36

Good luck.

Sadly, I think we'll be hearing more tales like this, however.

A lot of people bought at the max they could afford and in order to move on, they need to really max their profit, but as the market slows that's no longer a given.

Hope you're out fromm under this soon!

deste · 06/03/2008 21:11

We dont have that problem in Scotland. If you make an offer it has to stand. There is no such a thing as a chain. Unforunately we have another problem. For example my son offered £82,000 over the asking price today for a house and was last out of 4 offers.

expatinscotland · 06/03/2008 21:12

Unfortunately, deste, this can and does happen in Scotland, particularly in areas with large concentrations of English population, and is not technically illegal.

It's rare and most common in places like Edinburgh, but it's not unheard of.

southeastastra · 06/03/2008 21:15

it's crazy, how can people plan anything if they can just pull out. this rule has passed me by.

Fimbo · 06/03/2008 21:19

There can be hiccups in Scotland too but generally it is a much better system than England. Missives are usually completed much much quicker.

No stupid "exchange" nor the 10% nonsense.

desperatedora · 06/03/2008 21:27

I agree southeast, I think once you have made a formal verbal offer then at least you should have the protection of being able to reclaim for any fees you incur thereafter, especially when it is not a survey issue, just a plain change of mind.
I feel we have been lied to and have spent over a gtrand which is a lot to us, all because he fancied the idea of buying our house, for oh, all of five minutes (well a bit longer but you get my drift!)

OP posts:
LittleMinx · 14/03/2008 09:00

I do feel for you as exactly the same thing happened to us regarding our buyer pulling out the day we were due to exchange. As an estate agent myself, this unfortunately happens an awful lot. IMO people shouldn't be allowed to do this unless they have a very genuine reason. Can I also add, its not always buyers that pull out, it is sometimes vendors too!

doublethetrouble · 14/03/2008 11:49

Hi there is there any chance you could rent present home out and then get new mortgage for new home.

I used to work in mortgages and assuming your present mortgage will be covered by the rent you would gain from letting out property (using they would require it to be slightly more rent than the cost of the mortgage) lenders generally will give you permission to let property.

Lenders such as abbey national will then disregard previous mortgage when assessing how much they will lend you. Its likely they would need deposit though for new property but you could probably raise this on the property your living in.

We live in an area where you can hand properties over the council and they will rent them of you and guarantee the rent for x number of years. I have done this as an investment for my kids.

just an idea. Don't know if this would be option for you?.

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