Family wants me to give up my social house and I'm not - wwyd?

[spicy2001]

I currently rent a three bedroom social housing property and I live on my own. Most of the rent is paid for by universal credit and I have to pay 25% bedroom tax which is very affordable to me which is for two rooms and a shortfall of £30.55p.

I did speak to a housing officer and they said I am legally allowed to occupy it, and as long as I pay the rent on time, tax and shortfall, then everything is fine. I don't feel guilty for occupying this three bedroom house, it's been my home since I was born.

Recently, I noticed that my family were talking a lot about me downsizing. I asked why are they talking about me downsizing? They said because I don't need this property and have to downsize.

I explained I'm legally allowed to stay here, this is my property and not yours. I get that I don't need this property but I'm staying here because I'm allowed too. I found out that they actually joined a site called "home swapper" and a site called "glass bob" my sibling set up an account using her email address to advertise my property. If I'm correct, I've never joined these so I don't know 100% but they're platforms where you can do mutual exchange and advertise your property.

I phoned my housing association and explained the situation, they've started an investigation and they are speaking to various departments to see if they can do it from the end to see if they can do anything as they approved it but they don't know if they can disapprove it.

The other day a tenant from another part of my cul-de-sac came round and told me she knows I'm downsizing and she has a friend whose currently living in a one bedroom flat with his wife and they've got a one year old daughter and another baby on the way. I explained to this person my family have been trying to get me to downsize to a one bedroom flat and I'm not actually looking to downsize so I won't swap with them but told her I do sympathize with their situation.

She told all my neighbours about her friend and now all the neighbours are peed off at me because I'm not downsizing. My family are also peed of that I'm not downsizing. As far as I'm concerned I don't care as I have the legal right to stay here for as long as I like or want.

I just wanted to know though what would you do if you was in my situation?

I won't argue because everything you've said is correct. However, she's posted on a public forum so unless she only did it to talk to herself, people are going to have an opinion. Absolutely up to her what she does, doesn't mean we all have to agree.

I would like to add I've never said she should disadvantage herself. If she is able to downsize without making herself homeless then yeah, I think she should.

Yeah I'm with you OP. No way I'd give up a garden for a flat to share walls with upto 4 neighbours. There's nothing wrong with wanting security where you live and wanting to have a home rather than just live in a house.
I do agree that there's a social problem but the anger is being misplaced. Successive governments are to blame for this and the lack of affordable housing.

If they both pay their mortgage/rent they have a unconditional right to stay put. It's a home for as long as they want to live there. Why should either of them give that up because other more deserving people would like to live there instead?

“The OP is paying her rent with money given to her for free by the likes of Blueshoes via taxation.”

but presumably if the OP is working and playing council tax so also pays taxes…

Students don’t pay council tax

But she has the same legal security and entitlement to live there as an owner-occupier. It's a 1977 Rent Act secure tenancy (I'm guessing). It's not conditional on being a member of the "deserving poor" or moving aside if someone else wants it. It's her home for life.

I should have mentioned, obviously stay put until a one bed social housing house becomes available,I would never say go private to free up the house.

She’s not a student yet?

I spoke to my HA they said it can take up to 10 years for me to downsize to a one bedroom property that a HA property. I haven't decided if I want to get married or have kids yet but by that time I would be in my 30s and I would probably have a family of my own if I chose to have kids and get married.

Ah ok, this kind of lessens some of the others' objections maybe OP. They/we were assuming you were someone older probably and your situation of living alone isn't going to change.

As you haven't had kids yet then this could become the home you bring your kids up in, it might not permanently be just you. Although of course you might well choose to move in with a future partner/husband (though that'd reduce your level of security, which would be something you should bear in mind.)

OP does not 'deserve' 3 bedrooms. Social housing - the clue is in the word 'social'. She lives off the largess of the state by staying in a property that she does not own. She is legally entitled to, I am not disputing the law, but the law here is wrong. She will dig in her heels, she has said as much and will grab whatever she is entitled to. I don't blame her but I also judge her. If other families do so or kick a football at her house, it is because of her sense of entitlement. Hope she enjoys the property.

Yes @BanjoKnickers and if she moved into a private rental property then any UC she’s entitled to would increase because of extortionate rents. By the way the government has subsidised mortgages with quantative easing and keeping interest rates low for years so if anyone’s being subsidised it’s those with a mortgage

OP, for all the finger printing of the typically well housed MNetters, and of your neighbours who no doubt love the idea of someone being criticised who isn't them for a change; very few people in RL would significantly disadvantage themselves for moral reasons.
Giving up a secure tenancy on a nice property would be a huge sacrifice for you, and I very much doubt anyone on here has made a comparable one purely for others, and against their own wishes and interests.
If your family home was SH and you have a minimum wage job, a dodgy family, and have lost your parents, you have hardly had a life of privilege so far. The housing law that works to your advantage is a rare bit of good luck for you. Enjoy it.

I have a friend in this situation. She has a three bedroom HA house, with garden, which she would live in alone if it wasn't for the fact she rents out the other rooms, It means she's never had to work. It's galling to say the least.
The system badly need reform.

Hmmm, I am a little bit on the fence in these situations.

I am puzzled at to how tenancies can be handed down from parent to child and then to their child. Never happened with any authority I have ever known of, but a few people have said it's happened sooooo...

Anyway, it doesn't sit well with me really, when a single person is occupying a 3 bedroom family home, when (as has been said) many people - couples and single mums - are stuck in bedsits and 1 bed flats with one or two kids.

I do disagree that taxpayers are supporting people in social housing though (they may be helping support some, but not all.) I know several people in housing association homes who pay £450 to £500 a month rent. The homes were purchased for four or five thousand £££ each some 35-40 years ago by the social housing landlords, and the landlord now makes a good profit from many of the tenants. Tenants are OK with this, as they have affordable rent, and a permanent tenancy.

Annnnd... although I am a bit uncomfortable with you hogging this big house @spicy2001 I also don't think people should make you feel bad about staying. Unless your social housing landlord can provide you with a nice little 1-bed bungalow with a nice garden and driveway, then you should not be made to leave, or be made to feel shit about living there. (And these kinds of nice bungalows DO exist in social housing; I know a number of people in them!)

If you leave, as some people are insisting, where are you meant to go? Into a little shitty 1 bed flat? Probably in a block, with no garden, no driveway, a struggle to park, nowhere to hang your washing, people above you and below, (and on each side,) and very likely more antisocial behaviour/more noise Whilst there are SOME nice flats/nice blocks, the social housing ones are not usually in the nicer ones! Social housing flats are often minging.

You don't HAVE to leave. If you did have to, they would have made you by now... I don't know how old you are, but if you're young, you may have children one day, and will need/require/deserve the extra bedrooms then!

I mean, where does it all end anyway? I know a lady (widowed last year) who lives in a 2-bed bungalow. In the same village, one of these bungalows is occupied by a couple with 2 children. So should this woman leave for a shitty little poky 1-bed flat, so that a family of 4 can occupy the bungalow?

My friend (in her early 50,) is in a 4 bed semi-detatched house (council) with her husband and one daughter - 17. She has 3 children. A son aged 24 who has left to live with his girlfriend 2 years ago, and another daughter aged 29 who moved out 5 or 6 years ago and lives alone. She also has a vulnerable disabled brother, who, although he is reasonably independent, he does need guidance, and some care. She lives a mile from him and looks in on him every 2 or 3 days. He is nearly 60 and is going downhill quite quickly, and she reckons in the next 2-3 years he will need to move in with her.

She has been given earache like you OP, about how it's a 'disgrace' that she and her husband and one daughter occupy a big 4-bed home. But she said, one of the 2 other children may need to come back some time, and also her brother may need to move in. She loves it there, she doesn't HAVE to move, she may need another room or two at a later date, and she is staying put. No matter how people bash her.

Tell your family to bore off OP.

Why should either of them give that up because other more deserving people would like to live there instead?

@BanjoKnickers Perhaps precisely because other more 'deserving' people would like to live there instead?

By deserving I don't mean the 'deserving poor'- OP is currently working full time so she's one of those.

I mean that a family who need that size of house are arguably more deserving of being in it.

@spicy2001 Maybe you could work towards eventually buying under Right to Buy? A friend of mine was allowed to do it and she doesn't earn a massive amount.

I’m a bit taken aback by the level of bitterness directed at a seemingly young person who has lost her parents and whose remaining family have possibly committed identity fraud against her. It’s not her fault that other families pay a lot in private rent, have a high mortgage or are on the waiting list for social housing. Catch yourselves on. Jesus.

"If other families do so or kick a football at her house, it is because of her sense of entitlement*

Another one for your bingo card @gamerchick Harassment is ok if its against a social housing tenant.

Great for you, but not everyone has the opportunity to do that. And for someone who owns their own house and has no idea of the problems social housing brings, it’s a bit rich for people to be suggesting she puts herself at considerable disadvantage by giving up an assured tenancy in the name of ‘doing the right thing’.

Most 21/22 year olds don't live in nice bungalows with nice gardens or driveways. That's not a realistic expectation. She's young, a student, no dependents. She absolutely should be able to stay with HA, but a flat is perfectly reasonable and appropriate for her circumstances.
She may not legally have to leave, she bloody well should.

Why would those famillies kick a football at her house when they already have the house they want. No wonder there is a thread running at the mo where people dont want kids at their wedding

And where would you like her to go, given the long waiting lists for HA properties ? Move out into the private rental sector and need even more UC ?

I do agree that there's a social problem but the anger is being misplaced. Successive governments are to blame for this and the lack of affordable housing.

This ^. Successive governments since Thatcher have hugely depleted social housing stock alongside steep increases in house prices from the mid-1990s onwards. There are hardly any one bedroom social housing available for the OP to downsize to. According to Shelter In England, there are now 1.4 million fewer households in social housing than there were in 1980.

OP, do not give up your tenancy. A friend of mine is in private rented accommodation and it’s a nightmare.

If she is unable to arrange a swap, then that's a different conversation. But I somehow doubt it would be difficult.

You'd need your head read in this day in age to give up an assured tenancy for private rental.