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Upsizing - head or heart?

14 replies

InTheRoomWhereItHappens · 15/05/2023 23:57

We are empty nesters in our mid 50s. In 2019 we downsized (in size not cost) from a 4 bed semi-detached house to a 2 bed detached bungalow in a 'naice area'. It suited us well as it was 20 mins drive from family, an easy commute to both our jobs and as we were out all day a small cosy place was all we needed to come home to. The plan was we'd hopefully never have to move again - health permitting.

Fast forward nearly 4 years and we both now (willingly) work from home permanently and full time - no risk of being recalled to an office. MIL and my parents have died and our adult kids are settled independently.

We've decided that our little bungalow doesn't suit our needs anymore. We need a room each to work from due to the nature of our jobs and feel like work stuff is always 'there'. Lots of houses around us are being extended upwards to 3 stories so it's like being in a goldfish bowl all day.

We've decided to move and have been on the market for 2 weeks. Viewings are steady and we've had one offer that pulled out in a panic because we hadn't yet found somewhere else. So we're actively looking for our next home and have realised just how much more 'house' we could get for not much more than our little bungalow is up for.

We've found a gorgeous 4 bed detached house about 40 miles away. Not overlooked, and close to some great amenities. It's had everything done to a lovely standard so we'd just need some new furniture to fill the space.

There's a downstairs study, so we could have an office space each, a hobby room, a bedroom for us and still have a spare bedroom.

Sensible me says just move a short distance to another (slightly bigger) bungalow. But my heart says go for the kind of house I've always wished I lived in. We can afford it but would we be mad to take on a bigger house just for the 2 of us and our dog?

OP posts:
Defiantlynot41 · 16/05/2023 00:04

You will hopefully have many years to enjoy a bigger homes , and the need for space doesn't decrease once you retire - so lovely to have more garden and space to leave hobby or craft stuff put rather than having to pack away so you can use the dining table. We did it at 60 and no regrets

User19844666884 · 16/05/2023 00:07

If you can afford it, go for it

Wendysfriend · 16/05/2023 00:29

Definitely go with your heart, especially if you are in a position of not having to factor in schools, job etc.

The house sounds fab, everything you need plus more.

I bought with my head, big mistake, I'm stuck now, can never sell and I often pass the area I wanted to live, thought we could not afford it but we could have now looking back and silently cry inside.

Twiglets1 · 16/05/2023 06:42

Go for it - you downsized too early to that bungalow.

I have a similar plan (to downsize to a bungalow) but won't do it til I'm at least 70.

gymorgin · 16/05/2023 06:54

Do it

Roselilly36 · 16/05/2023 07:10

Yes go for the house you love, doesn’t mean you have to stay there forever, you can downsize again when you want or need too.

hopefulsquirrel · 16/05/2023 07:50

Sounds like you’d be mad not to go for it!

wildfirewonder · 16/05/2023 08:01

I would prioritise area over house as where you live affects how you live so much.

Having said that, a much bigger house is more work and I would prefer to avoid that.

There is not an obvious 'wrong' choice in thsi scenario providing the financials are all fine.

Regarding moving 40 miles away - what will you lose? Friends, activities? If not, then the relocation is not such a big deal.

PosiePerkinPootleFlump · 16/05/2023 09:03

Sounds like you downsized too early. Go for it. If you need to downsize at some point do that then but seems like you could enjoy your big house for 20 years or so first

MsGrumpytrousers · 16/05/2023 13:54

I'd absolutely go for it! Although it feels like heart vs head, I think there's often a lot of rational stuff going on underneath. Trust your instincts and buy it!

YourUserNameMustBeAtLeast3Characters · 16/05/2023 14:23

What is the local community like? I think that’s more important for the future as work scales down and your leisure time increases.

IamRoyFuckingKent · 16/05/2023 21:00

go for it if it will make you happy

InTheRoomWhereItHappens · 16/05/2023 23:07

Thanks for the comments everyone. I agree we probably did downsize too soon, so more space is a definite. With regard to hobbies etc, DH's don't involve interacting with others and I'm in a choir so could find one in another location. We're not massively sociable so don't go out with other people very much. We enjoy the theatre, cinema, eating out and walking the dog so wherever we go just needs these things to be practical.

There's no question that we're moving and I agree we can always downsize again later if we need to. We're going to make an offer -well an expression of interest - as we haven't sold ours yet. We've got 2 viewings booked to see ours over the next few days so fingers crossed.

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 16/05/2023 23:12

Same age as you op. We downsized dramatically. Instead of feeling cramped, we feel liberated. Less cleaning, upkeep, stuff.

instead of wfh I’ve opted for a shared office space. Less financial outlay and upkeep than a large house, lovely colleagues that help keep me young without any tedious office politics, and a joyful work/life separation. I’d recommend it if it’s an option near you

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