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Original poster

Estate agent ghosted us. Should I knock on vendor’s door?

71 replies

sellotape12 · 30/04/2023 10:43

I know this sounds insane! We live in a popular neighbourhood and have been offering on a house, going back and forth on tight negotiations.
But then the agent completely ghosted us, like he suddenly avoided our calls and emails for weeks (and even once pretended not to see us when we walked down the street!? This man is selling our house also).

We found out by accident the house has gone under offer to someone else and I’m both heartbroken and furious. Why didn’t he call us? We’d have been happy to continue negotiating up. My sister reckons pop round to the house and either knock on or or slip a note under to find out if the vendor ever actually received any of our offers. They can tell us to go away of course but at least we might get closure. Or is that just massively stupid?

We really want the house. But conscious another couple has been probably conveyancing now for 2-3 weeks.

OP posts:
MrMarkham · 30/04/2023 15:02

I mean it sounds like you made an offer, someone else made an offer and they accepted the other offer. It doesn't always go to best and final or bidding war type scenario. He should have told you though as soon as the other offer was accepted.

WomanStanleyWoman2 · 30/04/2023 15:10

Advantage of the note is it’s less intrusive and people don’t like to be put on the spot. Disadvantage is they could ignore it/ take a photo and email to agent

And you think they couldn’t just tell you to bugger off if you turned up on the doorstep? And that they couldn’t ring the agent and tell them?

Look, someone else got the house. It’s a shame, but it’s gone. The agent’s job is to get his client the best price and, if someone else has offered a price the client is happy with and are the buyer is in a good position, they’re going to go ahead. They don’t have to keep playing ping pong with you.

2bazookas · 30/04/2023 15:16

have been offering on a house, going back and forth on tight negotiations.

I would not entertain buyers who behaved like that, messing about.

No doubt the vendors got equally sick of your haggling, told their agent so, and accepted a firm offer from someone else.

Easterbunnywashere · 30/04/2023 15:25

I would assume that the other offer was better than yours and maybe they are cash buyers. The EA obviously knows your situation and is only under an obligation to inform the seller if you have made an increased offer. They are under no legal obligation to tell you about other offers. I imagine, as others have said, that they feel you are going to haggle too much over the small stuff.

CellophaneFlower · 30/04/2023 15:26

I do admit to making a similar mistake myself once. Viewed a house to be told by the vendor he'd had an asking price offer but he didn't like the guy much, so if we matched it, he would accept ours over his. Houses weren't selling for asking price at the time and I thought he was having us on, so called his bluff and offered 10k under, fully expecting the agent to come back to us asking for more if need be. They didn't and he accepted the other offer. At that point I did put a note through the door and would have gone 5k higher than asking price to secure the house given the opportunity (the most we'd ever have been able to scrape together). He ignored.

We did get the house eventually, as the sale fell through. It did teach me a lesson not to play games though! In hindsight, we overpaid and the house probably would have been worth that 10k less, but I still would have paid 5k more than we did. It's perfect for us and I've never found a house I'd have preferred (still have RM alerts set and at 100k more than our house is worth now).

EggInANest · 30/04/2023 15:28

Is your house under offer?

Highly likely the vendor accepted an offer that was higher and / or chain free.

Afaics the only thing the EA has done wrong is not let you know that an offer was accepted.

You could put a note through the door but I definitely would not knock. Just say you are sorry that your offer of xx was not the winning offer, but if they have further thoughts or if the sale falls through you would still be interested in continuing negotiation. Leave your e mail address. Wish them all the best whatever happens.

I employed an EA for a reason. If anyone knocked on my door I would have nothing more to do with them.

SeasonFinale · 30/04/2023 15:39

CellophaneFlower · 30/04/2023 13:32

When you say "going back and forth on tight negotiations" how many times do you mean?

It may well be that the vendor got a bit peed off with too much haggling and someone nipped in with a better offer meanwhile.

I suspect this may the case. Back and forth perhaps one tok many times and they didn't take you seriously and told the agent they don't want to sell to you because if there is this going on at such an early stage they anticipate you will be a nightmare ydrjng the actual sale and enquiries stage and anticipate you may gazunder at a late stage if you are not making acceptable counteroffers.

Original poster
sellotape12 · 30/04/2023 15:41

@unfortunateevents and @hellsbells99 Yes ours has been under offer with a FTB cash(!) buyer and has been for weeks, same Agent. We are proceedable. We can likely match the other offer but we don’t know if it’s too late.

OP posts:
MissCaptain · 30/04/2023 15:46

sellotape12 · 30/04/2023 12:19

< yes absolutely mad that he’s out selling agent too. We wondered if it’s a motivating ‘threat’ to pull our house from them if they don’t put us back at the negotiating table. I guess it depends if Estage agencies work on speed or volume.

How can you pull your house from them if it’s already under offer through them?

RedHelenB · 30/04/2023 15:52

Backwards a d forwards with tight negotiations doesn't really seem as though you were desperate yo buy that house. I think you are being a bit unreasonable and no I wouldn't annoy the vendors by putting a note through. They've probably got the price they want without all the faffing around

DoeRayMe · 30/04/2023 15:57

sellotape12 · 30/04/2023 15:41

@unfortunateevents and @hellsbells99 Yes ours has been under offer with a FTB cash(!) buyer and has been for weeks, same Agent. We are proceedable. We can likely match the other offer but we don’t know if it’s too late.

Go knock on the door and talk to the owner. Then you will know first hand

If I wanted a house that much, it is what I'd do in your situation

MikeWozniaksMohawk · 30/04/2023 16:04

StarbucksSmarterSister · 30/04/2023 12:15

This man is selling our house also

I'd ditch him asap and get another agent

And yes, contact the vendor to see if they received your offer.

agree 100% with ditching the agent for the sale of your house. And tell them why.

LindorDoubleChoc · 30/04/2023 16:07

Perhaps the vendor preferred the offer from someone else who put the offer on the table, best and final, and wasn't going to get involved in lots of tedious back and forth negotiating.

Modda · 30/04/2023 16:09

Maybe the other people went straight in at best offer. I would find that more appealing as a seller.

Fatandfunny · 30/04/2023 16:14

Whilst you were messing round negotiating someone’s obviously come in with a much better offer they’ve accepted.

TheSnowyOwl · 30/04/2023 16:22

sellotape12 · 30/04/2023 14:39

Yes I’m fully aware of all this, but we are all speculating. I guess my question now is whether to try slip a note under the vendor’s door or not.

No, they have another buyer. That buyer has probably already instructed a solicitor and started to spend money and emotional time on the house.

Chalk this up to experience and don’t bother playing games next time.

CellophaneFlower · 30/04/2023 16:24

MikeWozniaksMohawk · 30/04/2023 16:04

agree 100% with ditching the agent for the sale of your house. And tell them why.

Show quote history

So lose their sale? That really would be cutting their nose off to spite their face.

And tell them what? I'm not letting you sell my house as you haven't enabled me to buy the house I wanted but didn't want to pay full price for? Sounds a bit petulant and entitled to me.

BreadInCaptivity · 30/04/2023 16:30

There's a lot of speculation on this thread.

They might have had a better offer or been fed up with negotiating with the OP but none of these potential reasons explain why the EA has ghosted them.

A professional EA would simply inform them that their offer has been rejected for xyz reason.

Due to that fact I'd definitely drop a note through the door to check they received your most recent offer and you telephone number if the want to get in touch.

You've got absolutely nothing to lose and it's not invasive as long as you don't hassle them if they don't respond.

whowhatwerewhy · 30/04/2023 16:38

I would say while you have been negotiating to try to secure a good deal someone has gone in with a best and final offer.
The negotiation might of made the vendors think you would want to negotiate further down the line and went with the more straightforward buyer.

BreadInCaptivity · 30/04/2023 16:40

whowhatwerewhy · 30/04/2023 16:38

I would say while you have been negotiating to try to secure a good deal someone has gone in with a best and final offer.
The negotiation might of made the vendors think you would want to negotiate further down the line and went with the more straightforward buyer.

Ok but why wouldn't the EA simply explain that?

There are plenty of potential reasons but nothing that explains the odd behaviour of the EA - that's the issue here.

whowhatwerewhy · 30/04/2023 16:49

@BreadInCaptivity

I can only presume at some point op was told her latest offer had been rejected. Maybe the agent was waiting on further instructions from op . Maybe op was way off the price.
It sounds like the sale has been going through for 2-3 weeks, if it was the house of my dreams I wouldn't be back to the agent when my last offer was rejected.

MrsBlondie · 30/04/2023 17:34

Put a note through the door - what have you got to lose?!!

Original poster
sellotape12 · 30/04/2023 17:43

hey, you don’t have to be horrible to people on the Internet.

OP posts:
Original poster
sellotape12 · 30/04/2023 17:48

@BreadInCaptivity @whowhatwerewhy I think it was in my original post but no, we were never told if our offer was rejected or accept it. (For some reason, the point of this thread is getting lost as various people pile on!) The last thing that Estate Agent told us was that he thought we were going to “grab it” and he would call me back within the day with an update, and he never, ever did. And when we called back to find out any more information he avoided us. We couldn’t make any other decision because he simply would not return our calls or emails. The sudden silence meant that we were not able to discuss our offer. I know what to do about alternative properties.
And the people accusing me of being petulant for suggesting we remove ours from the market, the point is we don’t need to sell. We wanted to sell to get to this house. So if we haven’t got it, I’m happy to not sell at all.

OP posts:
Original poster
sellotape12 · 30/04/2023 17:50

sellotape12 · 30/04/2023 17:48

@BreadInCaptivity @whowhatwerewhy I think it was in my original post but no, we were never told if our offer was rejected or accept it. (For some reason, the point of this thread is getting lost as various people pile on!) The last thing that Estate Agent told us was that he thought we were going to “grab it” and he would call me back within the day with an update, and he never, ever did. And when we called back to find out any more information he avoided us. We couldn’t make any other decision because he simply would not return our calls or emails. The sudden silence meant that we were not able to discuss our offer. I know what to do about alternative properties.
And the people accusing me of being petulant for suggesting we remove ours from the market, the point is we don’t need to sell. We wanted to sell to get to this house. So if we haven’t got it, I’m happy to not sell at all.

Bath, typos.
We didn’t know what to do about alternative
properties*

OP posts: