Dream home or mortgage free?

[mamnotmum]

We moved in to our dream home 8 years ago. Renovated from scratch in a rural village. We love it. Nice neighbours, very private, amazing views.

Mortgage (250k) has just gone up to £1k a month. House is now worth £575k +

We could sell, buy a house on a decent estate for £350k in a town/village near us and be completely mortgage free. Bills would also drop by doing this making us approx £15k a year better off.

We want to stay where we are because we love it but currently (like everyone else) costs are rising and things feel tight. We have £25k savings but have started dipping into it regularly.

We have 3 kids so lots of outgoings but really want to be able to enjoy holidays with them, day trips and weekend adventures which as things stand will have to come from savings.

Anyone done this? Did you regret it? Any thoughts on what is best? Thanks.

We are almost the exact same situation, even down to the amounts of money. We cannot increase the terms of our mortgage as it is already maxed out. We are going to stay out for the following reasons...
our house is a great investment in an area which will likely continue to go up due to location.
I only work part time, and DH also has potential to increase his earning in the near future.
We have enough left over for modest holidays and days out, and our kids are easily pleased!
I love this house, and the space we have makes life much easier for us.
We are likely to get an inheritance in the next 5 years (but obviously not relying on it) from a very elderly relative.

However, If I were worried about money, or valued luxury holidays, I would not hesitate to sell and downsize.

Thanks for replying. It's such a hard decision isn't it?!

We have a 2 week summer holiday paid for already this year so not worried for this year. But the day trips / meals out are feeling expensive and we used to have these without feeling them at all.

Kids do ALOT of extra currics (£200+ a month) but don't want to stop these. Inheritance is a very long way off for us (I hope) and our earnings are fairly static - I can't see our income altering much in the near future.

Im hating the feeling of 'we can't afford it' to the things we do for fun. We love to have a date weekend 2-3 times a year, Center Parcs trips, day trips etc. And I know that's all possible with a move but we do absolutely LOVE our house and I think we'd find the adjustment to being near other people, roads etc a huge change.

Prioritise the house. Moving house in itself is such an expense, would more than swallow your savings.

Go through your budget with a fine tooth comb and work out where you can save. Holidays make children happy, sure, but so does stability and staying in a home they love. You will still be able to afford treats but perhaps more irregularly, you can make more of a “treat” about them. Go for hot chocs in cafes as opposed to brunch/ lunch. Have date meals vs date weekends. Plan days out that focus on being outside, free and cheap stuff (this is easier when it’s summer).

Mortgage rates are unlikely to go down, but you are paying this off. Energy bills are likely to go down which will make things easier. As kids get older you can focus on career growth.

But when times are tight, you can stay at home - the home that you love and have sunk loads of money into, vs a compromise home. Imagine driving past your home you love on the way back to one you don’t - and would be unlikely to be able to buy again in the future once you’re off that ladder.

We moved from a location I loved to a cheaper, apparently nice but in a different way, location. House is more or less the same size, but is pig ugly, my old home was pretty. The location has turned out to be not so nice as it seemed, there is anti-social behaviour and its just a lot rougher than I thought it was.

Its been well over a year, I hate the house, don't care for, or about, the location, and I still miss my old home like a bereavement.

If I could turn the clock back I would never have moved, I would have found a way to manage.

Yes we are mortgage free, but to me its not been worth it at all.

Stay in the house

Moving will cost you in solicitor's fees, stamp duty, estate agents' fees, moving costs, surveys, redecorating to your taste etc. I think you also need to mentally separate out the interest part of your mortgage from the capital repayment. That part is essentially money that you're saving, not spending. I view the interest we pay as the 'rent' and it's very much worth it for us . Plus as house prices increase (as they do in the long term) your dream house will go up in value more than your cheaper house.

And weekends away are occasional - you're in that house every day. Living in a house that meets your needs is a big deal imo.

Tldr - stay!

I would stay in the house. The whole process of buying/selling is just too much of a nightmare and you already know that this is a nice, safe area.

I would look at ways of saving more/increasing income instead.

What's your income if you don't mind stating? But from what you've said, I think I would stay put, so long as your lifestyle isn't hindered too much now.

Depends how much the mortgage could increase by, and whether that’s manageable for you. Personally I would rather be mortgage free.

I would stay.

As long as you can manage without excess stress, stay in the house. Nicer place to live, good investment, and it's all too easy for money to just drift away when you haven't got actual bills to pay. (Mortgage free here, it's amazing how much money I can spend on rubbish!)

Talk to the kids and engage them in the choice. Show them how much prices for everything are rising, and that belts are going to tighten a bit.

If you were asking about moving to a dream house or a more practical place, I would say go for the cheaper one, but you are already there, so I would try and stick with it. Moving is expensive anyway. You could easily spend £15k to move house. I was thinking just the other day about how we actually earn more but have a worse standard of living than a few years ago, unfortunately I think it is where a lot of people are at the moment.

How old are the DC. Living the rural life may be a dream now but will you all still like it when they are older?

You seem to be considering two extremes: a mortgage you can barely afford versus mortgage-free. Is there some middle ground of nice (but not dream) house with small mortgage. You also need to factor in the moving costs.

The other alternative is to increase income; everybody else seems to be on huge percentage rises at the moment!

Can you extend the term of the mortgage to reduce the monthly payment? Then aim to downsize in the future if needed.

Stay in the house. Although mortgage rates are unlikely to go down for a while, high interest rates will be pushing inflation in wages so your mortgage relative to income should reduce. Life will get easier.

I would also stay in the house. Is it likely you'd sell at the valuation; lots of houses near me in a naice area with appealing schools etc are only a selling with a significant reduction after months of being on the market.

I think it’s something you got to weigh up the pros and cons. I’ve seen many people post on here lately that they moved house from their ‘dream’ home and they regretted it. I feel that reading between the lines (and not knowing you - so impartial) to the situation I think you may feel the same way too.
Not many people have £25k in savings and I feel that if you make a few small adjustments to your lifestyle you can stretch your income.
In regards to mortgage - yeah seems expensive for sure - the time will come when it’s paid off - and you will most likely find that in years to come the value of your house will increase even more.

If it was me, I’d stay where you are.

Stay in the house. Forget about expensive holidays for a couple of years. Kids enjoy picnics, camping, beach days, etc. All fairly cheap stuff. Overpay the mortgage to reduce it and make it more manageable.

As much as date weekends and day trips etc are fun, they never make up for living somewhere you don’t love day after day and comparing it to your previously much loved house you had to give up. Especially if you go from having space and views to busy estate living, where lack of privacy and neighbour noise can be an issue.

on saying that though, is this really just about the luxuries. If not and you are potentially struggling then I’d consider down sizing if you simply can’t afford to live there.

the 15k drop in bills is a huge number though. Which indicates this is a massive down size you’re considering.

so if you can afford it. I’d stay put.

Stay. This Colc will pass. Your holiday is paid off for this year. We kept our big house while we needed the space with dc and it paid off later on when we did downsize, went mortgage free, part time and this year we are retiring early.
Use your imagination with the dc to have adventures - make dens, teddy bears picnics, camp in the garden, bike ride, local train ride, look out for coupons for days out or NT pass. Loads of cheap holidays available if you research and book well in advance so you can chip away at it. CP are so much cheaper if you are willing to take a day or so off from school. I used to book when there was an inset day.

Stay.

It's not as though you can't afford the mortgage payments or bills.

you live in a house you live, that you've made just how you want it, with plenty of space for everyone.

you'd be utterly mad to move to one like you've described so you can have date weekends/more days out/eat out more, but be living in a smaller, less nice, less spacious house.

stop thinking you need to spend money to enjoy life.

The times I remember, as a child, most fondly were days we 'did stuff' together, like going into the logging Forest (permitted) to chop the smaller branches for firewood, having tea from the flask & stacking the trailer. Or decorating & being trusted to do the gloss paint. Afternoons of trying to beat Dad at monopoly or building something with Dad.

Not the trips to places (which we also did)

same as in a relationship. We're there for each other every day. It doesn't require 'date weekends' all the time. Holidays don't need to be luxurious & exotic every year.

I get your generation has been brought up differently, & largely, my generation are to blame for that.

keep your lovely home, change your mindset.

keep your lovely home, change your mindset.

this with bells and whistles on.

If this was the opposite way round, upsizing and loosing the fun stuff, the answers would be a little different, as you can’t miss what you never had.

but it’s a very different animal to give up a house you’ve spent years renovating, love, with plenty of space and nearly 60 percent equity, just to do expensive fun stuff. It will never make up for the loss you feel on a day to day basis when you look around your home and our your windows.

I'd look to extend the mortgage term to the maximum possible (In UK mortgage market there is really no downsides to doing this as its normal to remortgage full amount every 2-5 years anyway) and look for ways to earn additional money.

I should have added as well that you can always take a lodger if you struggle once your kids have grown up and go to university. See it as a long term thing.

I am house hunting at the moment and the stress is awful. Once I find somewhere I am never, ever moving again!!