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Original poster

Downsizing with two primary school children - would we be mad?

38 replies

ILoveaSunflower · 08/01/2023 10:13

Our current house was bought 10 years ago with an inheritance before we had kids. It's in a stunning location, five beds, country views, and we completely renovated it to our taste etc. I realise how lucky we were to be able to do this.

However, ten years and two kids later were starting to find the cleaning and maintenance of it takes up all our time and money. The garden is split level so it means we have to go down a slippery stone steps to get to which in hindsight with kids was a mistake.

Our current income doesn't match the amount of money needed to maintain a house this size and it needs more money spent on it to make repairs etc than we currently have.

Would we be mad to downsize to a smaller more manageable house? Somewhere with a small garden and less rooms to clean? Something within our means to maintain.

We could use the equity to pay for our kids university or just as a nest egg for maintenance bills etc.

OP posts:
Original poster
ILoveaSunflower · 08/01/2023 10:14

I should add is it mad to be thinking about downsizing, are we too young? (Late thirties)

OP posts:
rwalker · 08/01/2023 10:15

I wouldn’t

itsgettingweird · 08/01/2023 10:15

Sound entirely sensible to me.

If a decent 3 bed with good sized garden makes a decent future nest egg you have the best of both worlds - a house you can afford to maintain and is big enough and financial security should anything go awry.

Gazelda · 08/01/2023 10:15

ILoveaSunflower · 08/01/2023 10:13

Our current house was bought 10 years ago with an inheritance before we had kids. It's in a stunning location, five beds, country views, and we completely renovated it to our taste etc. I realise how lucky we were to be able to do this.

However, ten years and two kids later were starting to find the cleaning and maintenance of it takes up all our time and money. The garden is split level so it means we have to go down a slippery stone steps to get to which in hindsight with kids was a mistake.

Our current income doesn't match the amount of money needed to maintain a house this size and it needs more money spent on it to make repairs etc than we currently have.

Would we be mad to downsize to a smaller more manageable house? Somewhere with a small garden and less rooms to clean? Something within our means to maintain.

We could use the equity to pay for our kids university or just as a nest egg for maintenance bills etc.

Of course you wouldn't be mad. Your house doesn't suit the family, so move to one that does. Bear in mind there will be costs associated with moving, but you'll gain financially in the long run.

BuffaloCauliflower · 08/01/2023 10:17

Sounds like a really sensible plan. Find something that works for your family.

toomuchlaundry · 08/01/2023 10:18

I’m assuming you are not contemplating downsizing to a one bedroom flat.

Turtledoveholly · 08/01/2023 10:18

Yes provided you can afford somewhere big enough and have factored in the costs to sell and buy .. or can you consider a lodger to increase income

MoreTeaLessCoffee · 08/01/2023 10:21

I would, why spend your kids' childhoods feeling permanently stressed about repairsband dissatisfied with your home if you don't need to. It's your home, move somewhere you can relax and enjoy.

UpendedPineapple · 08/01/2023 10:21

What's the downstairs space currently like?

Candleabra · 08/01/2023 10:22

Of course you wouldn’t be mad.
Find a house that suits your needs.
There’s a lot of downsizing that can be done from a 5 bed.
But don’t underestimate the amount of stuff you have, it just expands to fill a house. Be ruthless and declutter before the move or you’ll be disappointed and the new house will seem too small.

ProceedWithOptimism · 08/01/2023 10:30

I would; we're in a similar situation and will be downsizing in a few years once both kids are in their teens.

The maintenance of this house is expensive, time-consuming and boring! I dream of a boxy new build tbh.

Starlightstarbright1 · 08/01/2023 10:41

With 2 kids i would also think through transport, links to towns schools etc.

But no not unreasonable

Original poster
ILoveaSunflower · 08/01/2023 10:45

UpendedPineapple · 08/01/2023 10:21

What's the downstairs space currently like?

Kitchen diner, living room, utility, fifth bedroom plus bathroom. And a basement room that I hate as it has become a man cave

OP posts:
NancyJoan · 08/01/2023 10:47

A four bed with a more manageable garden sounds like it would suit you.

HandlebarLadyTash · 08/01/2023 10:49

Sounds like the right decision.

Didiplanthis · 08/01/2023 10:53

It sounds incredibly sensible ! We live rurally in a house that worked brilliantly pre kids it's OK size wise but I wish we lived nearer to town, that my secondary age child could get herself to and from school (it's a mile walk to the bus shop up a 60 mph country road with no pavement and annual fatalities). And less mud... urghh the mud !!!

Original poster
ILoveaSunflower · 08/01/2023 11:33

ProceedWithOptimism · 08/01/2023 10:30

I would; we're in a similar situation and will be downsizing in a few years once both kids are in their teens.

The maintenance of this house is expensive, time-consuming and boring! I dream of a boxy new build tbh.

Exactly! Me too!

OP posts:
SnowdaySewday · 08/01/2023 12:25

In 20 years time, are you and your children going to look back and think, “Wasn't it great having a big house and country views”, or “Wasn’t it great having the time and money to do things we wanted rather than parents working long hours and being stressed to pay for repairs and upkeep of the house”?

Think location rather than house (other than to get the minimum number of rooms you need) and find somewhere more manageable with good transport links so your children can easily get to school, friends and activities and a shed for the man cave.

Gassylady · 08/01/2023 12:38

Another one who can’t wait to downsize to a more modern square box with lower bills and a much smaller garden. My kids are in exam years at the moment so have made a conscious choice to wait until secondary school is done. If my kids were as young as yours I’d definitely be moving ASAP

NellyBarney · 08/01/2023 12:48

Be prepared that you will all get nostalgic, and only remember the good bits after a few years. It's imminently sensible to move now, so try and remember your reasons for it😀

DazzlePaintedBattlePants · 08/01/2023 13:00

I wouldn’t rule it out but I would be careful that the resulting cash doesn’t get frittered away.

I think it’s worth examining why you can no longer afford the current place. Increased mortgage rates? Lifestyle creep? Childcare costs? The house is an ancient money pit?

I have yet to regret having more space with children. And don’t forget your children will only be small for a short period of time (the comment about steps and supervision makes me think they are small). If you’re currently in the weeds of young children and nursery/childcare bills, that’s temporary and I’d try and wait it out.

Nikla · 08/01/2023 13:11

I would go for it.

A 3-4 bedroom house with a nice sized garden with 2 young kids would be perfect.

No point staying somewhere that you can't afford/maintain. No point in struggling.

Sounds like a good idea to me!

TheaBrandt · 08/01/2023 13:15

How old are the kids? Unless they are super wholesome horsey types teens and rural is not a great mix. My teens have a far better quality of life than I did growing up in a village with minimal public transport

PeekAtYou · 08/01/2023 13:17

I would downsize so that I could use the extra cash on other things like holidays that would bring me more joy. I'm

megletthesecond · 08/01/2023 13:18

Go and get yourself a 4 bed with good transport links and practical garden. Houses in towns can still have a nice view.